What happens when 800 of the world’s most elite footballers
and their managers live together under one roof
Players stop being polite
and start getting Re-al
This is
The Champions
Bayern is not sleeping
we’re just giving other teams in Bundesliga a head start
I dress in all black
because every game is a funeral for the other team
Right now this show is good
people are happy
But wait until Season 3
things will go very bad
Now you see it
Now you don’t!
Obrigado, obrigado
A hat-trick
Don’t see what the big deal is. I can do that.
For my final trick
I need two volunteers
Ow, my shoulder hurts
Ah...my good friend Mo Salah has volunteered
No...I was just stretch–
A round of applause for Mo Salah, everybody, Puskas winner
Anyone else?
I’ll do it
Oh, Sergio Ramos wants to
OK. Come on up.
I’ve got a very bad feeling about this
Please dim the lights
Firmino
And now, let me see. Can Mo go
from box to box!
Er, please, I would like to leave this box
No problem, Mo
Ibra
Khedira
El Shaarawy!
Oh s--t.
Oh my goodness!
What is this?
What?
I’m so sorry
I don’t know what happened
Well, can you separate us?!
I’m not a doctor
I… I can’t...
What do you mean?
You caused this! You fix this!
Sergio, be nice
You catch more flies with honey than-
Ow!
What?
You listen, OK
If you don’t use your little magician magic to fix this
then I’m going to make YOU disappear
OK
I’m just a little magician, OK, not a BIG magician
You need a real sorcerer.
Take this.
El Brujo De Porto Alegre
The Great Warlock
He has tortured me in the past
And to this day, it still gives me nightmares
He sounds cool to me!
This place gives me the creeps, man
Maybe we should just go see a normal doctor?
Oh, Mr. Tough Guy
shaking in his boots
Listen, you don’t know what this witch is capable of, OK!
Well, whatever it is, it got him a nice house
Oh great Jinn, we seek your help
I, Ronaldinho, would be happy to help you-
Oh!
We would be most grateful if you could separate us
If there is anyone in this whole world who knows about
getting separation from Sergio Ramos, it’s me, baby
Let me see here
Ay, that’s definitely a curse
A curse?
Yup. Curse.
Ah, but the good news is
that this curse is a lot like Sergio
It’s very easy to break through
Sorry...my shoulder is...
kind of a dick
Ah, Ramos doesn’t scare me
His violence is a compliment
It’s his way of letting you know
he can’t stop you
Oh, is that right?
Don’t you make me break your other shoulder
you one-season wonder!
At least I am not a cheater!
OK! OK! Enough, you two!
Enough, you...one...two...
Listen
It seems that when Coutinho did his incantation
he didn’t account for your animosity towards each other
You can’t have hatred in your soul when you go box to box
I learned this lesson well as a man who has two wives
I can tell you
But don't worry
It's very easy to fix
This curse will be lifted when you, Sergio
apologize to Mo for injuring his shoulder
And all you have to do, Mo
is simply forgive Sergio
Nah, forget it
Not worth it