Hey everyone,
Welcome to another installment of Harry Potter Theory. In this video, I’m going to be discussing
Hogwarts - the finest school of witchcraft and wizardry in the wizarding world. More
specifically, I’m going to be discussing something that you’ve probably never thought
about - the schools plumbing system.
Hogwarts was founded around 990 AD- when four 10th century witches and wizards got together,
and decided that they had in the sorting hat’s own words: ‘the selfsame yearning, to make
the world’s best magic school’. These founders were Godric Gryffindor, Rowena Ravenclaw,
Salazar Slytherin and Helga Hufflepuff. When the quartet finally got together, they put
their magical powers together and Hogwarts was born. When Hogwarts was first founded,
it was a time of hardship for witches and wizards- as everyday magical folk were being
persecuted by muggles for their abilities. It was a time of tension and hostility- which
is why it was so important that the magical school remained hidden somewhere in the Scottish
highlands. Students began attending the school right away, and the four founders each helmed
one of the four Hogwarts houses- Gryffindor, Slytherin, Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff.
This time period differed from the current time period in many ways, and the Hogwarts
castle was no exception to changes through the passage of time. Over the years, as technology
progressed, the castle was outfitted with upgrades as to reflect these new technologies.
And one supremely important piece of technology that we didn’t always have around, that
is often overlooked, is the TOILET.
According to wikipedia:
The first modern flushable toilet was described in 1596 by Sir John Harington, an English
courtier and the godson of Queen Elizabeth I. Harington’s device called for a 2-foot-deep
oval bowl waterproofed with pitch, resin and wax and fed by water from an upstairs cistern.
This meant that for hundreds of years the Hogwarts castle had no toilets- in fact, according
to JK Rowling, Hogwarts wasn’t outfitted with proper toilets until the EIGHTEENTH century.
So what, you might ask, did witches and wizards do to relieve themselves before the introduction
of toilets in to the castle? Well, this peculiar 2019 Tweet from the Wizarding World Twitter
gives us some insight:
“Hogwarts didn't always have bathrooms. Before adopting Muggle plumbing methods in
the eighteenth century, witches and wizards simply relieved themselves wherever they stood,
and vanished the evidence.” Now, while this sounds absurd and disgusting-
relieving themselves where they stood was actually a much less animalistic method than
what the rest of the world was doing before the introduction of toilets. In fact, before
the modern day toilet became commonplace, muggles would use ‘chamber pots’- large
basins located inside of the house. However, there was no plumbing to speak of that was
attached to these chamber pots- thus the contents were simply THROWN out of the window or off
the balcony. If people needed to relieve themselves and they were out and about- it was common
practice to simply drop trou and do the business right where you stand. In fact, this practice
was so common that in a 1609 book that advised gentlemen on manners- there was a whole segment
on how to deal with the smell of other people’s excrement.
In the mid 1700s Hogwarts finally installed its plumbing system, and interestingly enough,
this plumbing system actually endangered the hidden location of Hogwarts founder Salazar
Slytherin’s ‘Chamber of Secrets’ - the same chamber containing the fabled basilisk
intended to rid the school of muggleborns. This is because the proposed plumbing system
was constructed right on top of it. According to CANON- a descendant of Slytherin who was
at the school at the time helped to keep the chamber hidden by concealing the trap door
that led to the chamber. I love that that’s canon.
But the canon that I love even more, in such an absurd way, is that witches and wizards
simply did the business and vanished the evidence. What a concept. However, this notion also
brings with it some other questions - what did less talented witches and wizards do?
Let’s say, you relieve yourself, but you’re a first year and you haven’t quite gotten
the hang of magic yet. What then? Is it the responsibility of your professor and classmates
to dispose of your excrement? Or is the onus on you to do it? Perhaps the embarrassment
of not being able to do it pushes them to learn faster.
One thing is for sure- witch, wizard or muggle, people were gross back in the day.
Did you guys know this VALUABLE piece of wizarding canon?
Let me know in the comment section below
Until next time
It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live