>> Stephen: HEY, EVERYBODY!
WELCOME BACK!
MY NEXT GUEST IS A WRITER, DIRECTOR, AND PRODUCER YOU KNOW
FROM MOVIES INCLUDING, "THE 40-YEAR-OLD VIRGIN," "KNOCKED
UP," AND, "THE KING OF STATEN ISLAND."
HE HAS JUST CO-DIRECTED A TWO-PART DOCUMENTARY ON GEORGE
CARLIN CALLED, "GEORGE CARLIN'S AMERICAN DREAM."
PLEASE WELCOME BACK TO THE LATE SHOW, JUDD APATOW.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ( BAND PLAYING )
>> Stephen: THANKS FOR BEING HERE.
>> SO GOOD, SO GOOD.
>> Stephen: YOU LOOK NICE.
YOU LOOK REALLY NICE.
>> Stephen: THANK YOU SO MUCH.
WE'RE COVID FRESH.
>> Stephen: HAVE YOU HAD IT?
I HAD IT, LIKE, THREE WEEKS AGO FOR MY SECOND TIME.
>> Stephen: I HAD IT THREE WEEKS AGO AND IT DIDN'T STOP
TILL A COUPLE OF DAYS AGO.
>> IT PAUSED.
>> Stephen: THAT PAUSE IN THE MIDDLE.
YOU HAD IT TWICE.
DID YOU HAVE THE ORIGINAL.
>> YEAH.
>> Stephen: THE CLASSIC AND THE --
>> THE CLASSIC.
IT'S DIFFERENT WHEN YOU GET THE CLASSIC BECAUSE BACK THEN PEOPLE
WERE REALLY NERVES AND YOUR FRIENDS WOULD CALL YOU AND SAY,
YOU OKAY, MAN?
JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW, I LOVE YOU, IF YOU NEED ANYTHING --
( LAUGHTER ) WHEN I GOT IT THREE WEEKS AGO,
SOMEBODY CALLED AND SAID, HEY, I HOPE THE LAKERS DON'T TRADE
LeBRON.
( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: Y YOU CO-WROTE A
DOCUMENTARY "GEORGE CARLIN'S AMERICAN DREAM."
>> YES.
>> Stephen: ONE OF MY GREATEST REGRETS IS I NEVER GOT A CHANCE
TO MEET HIM.
WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST EXPOSURE TO HIM?
CLASS CLOWN, ONE OF MY BROTHERS HAD THE ALBUM AND LEFT IT WHEN
THEY WENT TO COLLEGE BECAUSE I DIDN'T WANT ME MOM TO KNOW.
>> HE'D SAY THE DIRTY WORDS.
HE'D SAY, YOU KNOW, YOU CAN PRICK YOUR FINGER BUT YOU CAN'T
( BLEEP ), ( BLEEP ).
( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: WHAT WAS YOUR
FIRST EXPOSURE.
>> MY FIRST JOB IS I WORKED FOR COMIC RELIEF AND MY JOB WAS TO
GET EVERYBODY'S AUTOGRAPH ON THE POSTER SO THEY COULD SELL IT FOR
CHARITY, AND THIS IS ME GETTING HIS AUTOGRAPH.
( APPLAUSE ) CHECK OUT MY OUTFIT.
I GOT THE GREEN WITH THE YELLOW AND THE BLUE.
>> Stephen: A COMEDIAN.
EXACTLY.
LOOK, NO BEARD.
>> Stephen: YEAH.
MY FAMILY HATES I HAVE NO BEARD.
>> Stephen: WHAT WAS YOUR EXPOSURE?
HOW DID YOU FIRST FEEL ABOUT HIM?
>> I HEARD ABOUT HIM BECAUSE AT MY HOUSE WE HAD THE LENNY BRUCE
RECORDS, THE GEORGE CALLAN RECORDS AND THE BILL COSBY
RECORDS.
>> Stephen: THE WHAT?
THE BILL COSBY RECORDS ( LAUGHTER )
>> Stephen: WE HAD THEM, TOO, THE BILL COSBY RECORD AND GEORGE
CARLIN.
HE'S ON MY MT. RUSHMORE.
>> AND YOU'RE IN THE DOCUMENTARY.
>> Stephen: I HOPE I SAID FINE THINGS.
>> YOU WERE VERY ELOQUENT.
I WAS GLAD YOU'RE IN IT BECAUSE YOU TALK GOOD.
>> Stephen: THEY PAY ME TALK GOOD!
( LAUGHTER ) >> WE WOULD WATCH IT AND EDIT
YOUR INTERVIEW AND SAY, HE'S SO SMART.
I'M GLAD I DON'T TALK ON AN INTERVIEW BECAUSE I'M DUMB BUT
YOU ENCAPSULATE EVERYTHING.
>> Stephen: I WORKED FOR SMART CENTRAL MANY YEARS.
>> WHY WAS GEORGE CARLIN MEANINGFUL TO YOU?
>> Stephen: I'LL ASK THE QUESTIONS.
( LAUGHTER ) IT WAS JUST FUNNY, LIKE, I'M AN
IRISH CATHOLIC KID AND HE'SING ABOUT HIS IRISH CATHOLIC
CHILDHOOD.
HE OPENED MY EYES TO A WHOLE OTHER THING YOU CAN MAKE FUN OF.
I DIDN'T REALIZE YOU COULD MAKE FUN OF THE CHURCH.
HE'D SAY, THEY GOT RID OF LIMBO.
IT WAS HARD TO UNDERSTAND.
WELCOME -- TO LIMBO.
>> HE WAS VERY AGAINST THE IDEA OF HELL.
HE DIDN'T LIKE HELL WAS PART OF RELIGION BECAUSE HE USED TO SAY,
THEY TELL YOU IF YOU DON'T FOLOW THESE RULES, YOU'RE GOING
TO BURN IN HELL -- BUT WE LOVE YOU!
AND WE NEED MONEY!
( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: DID YOU LEARN
ANYTHING ANT GEORGE CARLIN THAT YOU DIDN'T KNOW, SOMETHING THAT
SURPRISED YOU ABOUT THIS DOCUMENTARY?
>> ONE THING THAT SURPRISED ME IS, YOU KNOW, HE HAD MANY
PHASES.
HE WAS LIKE BONO.
HE WOULD REINVENT U2 EVERY YEAR.
>> Stephen: LIKE IN THE BEATLES, I WANT TO HOLD YOUR
HAND, THEN HE PUT OUT THE WHITE ALBUM.
>> IN THE MID '80s HE SAW SAM KENNISON AND HE SAID I DON'T
WANT TO EAT THIS GUY'S DUST AND HE TRIED TO OUTDO HIM FOR THE
NEXT 20 YEARS.
>> Stephen: HE WAS GREAT FOR THE FEUD-LIKE MONOLOGUES.
DO YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT WHAT HIS PROCESS WAS LIKE?
BECAUSE HE'S SOMEBODY WHO DOES OR HAS DONE SIMILAR WORK.
WHAT WAS IT LIKE, HE WOULD BASICALLY DO A 45 MINUTE TO AN
HOUR MONOLOGUE.
THERE ARE JOKES IF IT BUT HE IS TELLING YOU THE PROCESS TODAY.
>> HIS MAIN PROCESS IS HE DID COCAINE.
>> Stephen: DID HE DO A LOT OF COCAINE.
>> HE WAS OBSESSED WITH WORDS.
I THINK HE MAY HAVE BEEN OBSESSIVE COMPULSIVE IN SOME WAY
OR HAD ATTENTION DEFICIT AND MAYBE WAS DOING DRUGS AS SOME
WEIRD WAY TO FOCUS HIMSELF.
HE NEVER HUNG OUT WITH PEOPLE OR PARTY, BUT HE WOULD DO A LOT OF
DRUGS AND WRITE AND WRITE AND LISTEN TO MUSIC.
>> Stephen: ONE OF MY FAVORITE THINGS I HEARD CARLIN TALK ABOUT
WAS THAT HE HE MISUNDERSTOOD LY BRUCE THAT HE THOUGHT IT WAS
COOL TO BE ARRESTED AND ENDED UP IN A PADDY WAGON WITH LENNY
BRUCE ONCE AND SAID, WE DID IT, WE GOT ARRESTED.
LENNY SAID, DUMMY, THE OBJECTIVE IS TO STAY ON STAGE AND SAY YOUR
STUFF.
>> LENNY BRUCE WAS IN A COMEDY TEAM WITH JACK BURNS AND LIKED
HIM AND CALLED HIS EIGHT AND SAID SIGN HIM.
>> Stephen: I DIDN'T KNOW THAT.
>> HE GOT HIM IN THE BUSINESS.
>> Stephen: WOW.
WHAT DO YOU THINK CARLIN WOULD BE TALKING ABOUT TODAY?
DID YOU SEE THAT INTERVIEW WITH ESPER JUST NOW?
>> I DON'T THINK GEORGE CARLIN WOULD LIKE MARK ESPER.
( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: WHY NOT?
WHY NOT?
>> BECAUSE CARLIN'S WHOLE IDEA WS THAT PEOPLE WITH MONEY
MANIPULATE THE WHOLE SYSTEM.
SO IF SOMEBODY KNOWS THAT TRUMP IS A MANIAC AND YOU WOULD THINK
THE DAY AFTER HE GETS FIRED IS THE DAY TO GO, HEY, HE WANTED TO
SHOOT ALL THE GEORGE FLOYD PROTESTORS IN THE LEGS, BUT HE
WAITS A YEAR TO WRITE A BOOK AND MAKES MONEY.
THAT WAS GEORGE CARLIN'S WHOLE THING IS THEY'RE NOT LOOKING OUT
FOR YOU.
>> Stephen: YEAH, YEAH.
LET'S TALK ABOUT PEOPLE YOU LOOK OUT FOR.
>> YEAH.
>> Stephen: YOUR FAMILY.
THAT'S RIGHT.
>> Stephen: WE'VE ALREADY TALKED ABOUT YOUR LOVELY WIFE
LESLIE.
THERE YOU GO.
YOU ALSO HAVE TWO DAUGHTERS WHO ARE IN THE BUSINESS NOW.
DOES THAT MAKE YOU NERVOUS KNOWING WHAT SHOW BUSINESS IS
LIKE?
ARE YOU, LIKE, GO FOR IT, IT'S NOT THAT HARD.
>> YOUR DREAM IS YOUR KIDS WILL SURPASS YOU.
AND THEY HAVE.
>> Stephen: NO.
YOU WANT THEM TO FAIL?
>> Stephen: NUMBER ONE, BABY.
NUMBER ONE.
( APPLAUSE ) ARE YOU NERVOUS AT ALL?
THIS IS A WEIRD BUSINESS TO BE IN.
>> I LIKE IT.
I JUST SAY STAY AWAY FROM THE COCAINE.
>> Stephen: WORKED FOR GEORGE CARLIN.
DID YOU ENJOY THE COCAINE?
>> I NEVER DID COCAINE.
I'M SCARED OF ALL THINGS.
MY MOM GAVE ME FIVE BUCKS NOT TO SMOKE WHEN I WAS TEN YEARS OLD
AND I, FOR SOME REASON, HONOR THAT.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> Stephen: MOMS.
MOMS.
"GEORGE CARLIN'S AMERICAN DREAM" PREMIERES THIS FRIDAY ON HBO.
JUDD APATOW, EVERYBODY.
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.