I had a client [who] asked me yesterday, "Mark, I want to keep this guy's interest, but I want to do
it in some fun ways. I want to actually enjoy the process." So I thought in today's video,
I would share with you seven fun ways to keep a guy's interest. Don't forget to check out my book.
It is now available. You can grab it from the description below. I do a whole chapter on this.
Grab it, it's fantastic. And I'll see you for the fun ways to keep his interest right after this.
[Music playing]
So in today's video, we're going to be talking about seven fun ways to keep a guy's interests.
So let's get straight into them, ways that you can enjoy to keep his interest. Number one,
focus on feminine energy in particular, responding and receiving. So one of the big ways to make a
guy chase that you're going to enjoy is when he comes to you, but for him to come to you, there
has to be the space for him to do that. There has to be, you've got to create that space. You've got
to allow that to happen. So by responding, by focusing on responding, when he comes to you,
he's listening for that energetic reward, right? He wants to feel the energetic reward of, "Hey,
I was a good guy and I came to you, so I get the feminine energy response," which is in your
enthusiasm, your excitement to see him, the energy that you share with him in the way you respond
could be something super simple. The energy you give him in a text. He asks you out,
the responsiveness you give to him in the way you respond. Not only do you get to feel great
in your feminine, him chasing, but he gets to feel like he came to you and got rewarded for it.
Receiving such a key piece of your feminine energy, and for all the women I talk to,
receiving, when they allow themselves to do it, it feels fantastic for them.
When you allow him to give and yourself to just receive, it raises your value in his eyes. It
raises your value in your own eyes and it makes you feel really, really good. So focusing on
feminine energy in terms of the way you respond and the way you receive is very, very powerful
in making a guy chase. Number two is do everything slowly. Now, sometimes my clients think I'm trying
to spoil their fun when I give them this tip, but it, it actually enhances the relationship,
and it enhances your enjoyment. It allows him to chase more, and it gives the opportunity for
a really healthy long-term relationship to form. So when you move things a bit slower,
I'll give you an example. I have a client, she's getting divorced. And she said, "Mark,
I've been seeing this guy a month. He met my kid yesterday, and we're already seeing each other
three times a week." Pretty quick, right? I said to her, "Look, if you slow it down,
you'll have the opportunity to do all the things you want to do now--that is enjoy your time with
him, enjoy the sex with him, enjoy the good vibes with him. You can do all of that just as well
in a month or two months from now, while still seeing him one to two times a week now.
And even though it takes away a little bit of your present fun, what it does is it allows that that
whole experience to expand over time. You don't get in too deep too fast, and it actually gives
the opportunity for you to form something really real with this guy." It is always hard, especially
if you've just come out of a relationship for example, and you're a bit deprived. You're like,
"I just want to enjoy myself." And that's all great. But by doing things slowly, by leaving
some healthy time gaps by just maybe maxing it out twice a week early on, and just taking that time,
you'll allow things to form really organically really naturally. And it creates that challenge in
that space for him to miss you and him to be the driving force and him chasing you. Not only that,
doing things slowly allows you to have good boundaries against love bombers or guys who
want to go too fast. It gets respect from the guys who want to go at a healthy pace and it sets your
early boundaries. All good things. So early on, do things slowly. Number three is to keep your long
standards in your mind. So by long standards, I mean standards that you want to be able to tell
from a first date. Think about some things that you're looking for in a guy that you wouldn't
be able to tell from the first date, the first week, even the first month. For example, is he
always going to talk to you respectfully when he's tired or in a really bad mood or really stressed?
Probably not going to know that in the first month. Is he able to show a range of emotions?
Can he show healthy sadness or healthy insecurity? Can he be vulnerable? Can he
show the emotions that men are told are weak? A lot of that stuff, you not, probably not going to
see in the first month, right? Can he do healthy conflict with you? Does he still respect you when
you guys are in conflict? How does he go when he hears your Nos, when you put a boundary up that he
doesn't like? All of these things are things that will take a little longer to come out.
And they're things that really make the foundation of a healthy relationship. So I'd really encourage
you to keep these in the forefront of your mind. And the way it makes the guy chase is that a guy
will feel that you have these long-term standards and he feels that extra challenge. He feels that
you're not fully won over. I still have to prove myself. And that's a super healthy way to approach
things. So by keeping your long standards in mind, things that are going to take time to come out,
you not only get a great relationship, which is going to be fun for you,
but you also keep the guy chasing. Number four is to stay present. And by saying "present," I mean,
rein back in the future projections in your own mind, right? It's so easy to project out in the
future and think, "We're going to be amazing in years. It's going to be the most beautiful
life together." I advise clients to try not to think, beyond the time you've been seeing him
or most double the time you've been seeing him, right? So if you've been seeing him a week,
try not to think beyond one to two weeks into the future. If you've been seeing him a month,
try not to think beyond one to two months and so on. Now, obviously as you've been together
longer and longer, that expands further, but early on, a great way to keep him chasing,
we already talked about keeping the long standards in mind where he has to prove himself,
but also staying present in the now because the guy will feel, "Okay again, I've still got to
prove myself. I've still got to show up the best. I can't just get lazy with this, girl, with this
woman." And that alone, you just staying present, letting him drive the car feels real good for you,
but it also keeps the guy chasing. Number five is make a note of his fears. So it's easy when you
get to really like someone and you feel yourself putting them a little bit on a pedestal up there.
It's easy to sort of forget that this is just a man, who's a human, who has fears just like you.
And depending on what the guy is, he's going to have all different kinds of fears.
So avoidant men, they're going to be scared of not having their needs met, of no one being there for
them at a deep level. Anxious men are going to be scared of you abandoning them, even secure
men are going to be scared of not being useful to you or not serving a purpose in your life.
Men are just humans. We have fears as well. We get scared like you do. And by you seeing that,
not only does it make you feel safer and calm you down because it's like, we're just imperfect
humans like you are, it's going to make him feel more connected to you because he's going to say,
"Well, she sees me for what I am. She's not got me on a pedestal. She's not putting me up
way up there. I'm just, I'm just a human in her eyes, which he knows, so he's going to feel good
about it. He's going to move towards you. And you're going to feel good about that too. So by
making note of men's fears seeing the humanity and fear that we all have, you're going to be able to
really relate to him. He's going to be able to relate to you. And ultimately, that's going to
keep him moving towards you. Number six is the attitude of gratitude. How attractive is it when
a man can just be in a grateful state around you? He says, you know what? I'm having a rough day,
but I'm grateful I have food in the fridge. I'm grateful I have a roof. I'm grateful I'm here and
I'm breathing, and I'm grateful for life. I might be grateful for a book, all these little things
that he can just find gratitude for, that is just an attractive energy. I don't care what you say,
man, or woman, that's going to be an attractive energy. Not only that though, does it make the guy
chase? Yes, it does. But it makes you feel great right throughout your day. And I know for me,
this is a big reset for me. If I get in a negative mindset or if I'm, if I'm focusing on,
what's not working in life, simply going back to all the things that I'm so lucky to have,
it always reinvigorates me. And it always makes me a nicer person to be around as well. So by
fostering this attitude of gratitude could even be something as simple as before you go online, you
look at five things you're grateful for, or you do a gratitude diary each night, But I'm telling you,
by fostering this energy, you're going to feel great. And when you share this energy around,
you will absolutely have men and people moving towards you and guys chasing you
for a relationship. And number seven is to know your worth. And that gets thrown around
a lot. You hear a lot of coaches say that, so what does it mean? Well, on a practical level.
And, and this took me a while to absorb and to really remind myself that I have unique value.
There is no one out there like you, in fact, there is no one out there who's likely anything like you
at all. And it's amazing how often we forget that. We think, "Oh, that person, that guy,
or that girl has the same to offer a partner as me. They're better than me." And it's like,
we're comparing some very basic things. And for some reason, we always compare ourselves short,
and that's just not true. But if that's your mindset, unfortunately, that becomes your
reality. So what I have clients do, and what I'd recommend for you to do is to write a list.
If you've got a hundred things, yes. 100 things that you write down that are amazing about you,
that creates a really beautiful cushion under your confidence, under your relationships, even
under your dating, which says, "Well, you know what? I've got a hundred great things about me,
so it's kind of your loss if you don't follow this through." And men sense that attitude and
they're like, "Oh, it's kind of my loss if I don't go after her. I better go after her.
And I do it! Like they really, really chase, but you've got to keep this in mind.
And whatever you focus on with your mind is going to grow. So if you focus on all
the things that aren't working for you, or the ways others are better than you, that will grow,
and that energy will come across. Versus if you focus on all the things that you have to offer
that too, will grow and that energy will come across. So I recommend having a big list and then
having five to 10 that you really know at the forefront of your mind and go over these every
single day, because there are certain things about you that no other woman can match. Absolutely not.
And when you really know those things at a deep level, and you put your focus on them every day,
men are going to feel that. And because you are valuing those things within yourself,
they will too. So that is knowing your worth. And that is seven ways. Don't forget my book is
now available. So grab it from the description, lots of stuff in here about self-esteem dating,
understanding men, all that sort of stuff is in here, building great relationship, check it out.
And hit the subscribe button if you haven't already. Subscribe button, little bell, so you
get the notification, leave a comment in the space below. What are some fun ways that you found to
get a guy chasing you? I'd love to hear them. Pop them in space below. And if you have a question,
pop it below as well, and I'll answer it in Ask Mark. I'll see you in the next video very soon.
Showing bloopers.
What have you done, Matty?
You can post that.
Try to work here, but Matty's glued my face on the sunflower in the background. Look!
Matthew, do we need to get you more work? Are you happy? Are you happy where you at?
It does, it's right in the sunflower. Look at it. Look at that smile. This guy.