- In this video, I wanna prove to you,
in however long you see this video is,
I want to prove to you that you are worthy.
And not just prove it to you,
but show you where it stemmed from
when you started to believe that you weren't worthy,
and using an analogy that will change your life,
and the way that you view this.
Now, this thing right here, this little light bulb,
let me show you something about it.
Think of the belief where you may say to yourself,
"I'm not worthy."
The way that our reality works
is that everything in our life
has no built-in meaning, than the meaning we give it.
Now, another word for meaning is belief, or story.
Now what happens is this,
now this little thing right here,
imagine that you are the source of light.
Even as I go right over here right now,
you see these light bulbs right there,
and it's the same thing as this.
Now, imagine that what happens is this is a belief.
Now say the belief is I have ADHD, and I'm not worthy.
Say the belief is from some childhood experience,
there was something that happened,
and you said, "There's something wrong with me.
Someone abandoned me."
What happens is then that light bulb begins to shine.
And then what happens is that belief is activated within us.
Now, the thing to remember is that we are the source.
We are choosing where we put meaning.
Now let's say one of these bulbs says that we're worthy.
Let's say one of these bulbs says,
"I was neglected when I was young, and I rejected."
And then what we did is we tried to do everything we could
to not get rejected again.
Happens a lot with abandonment wounds.
Somebody abandons us, and then what happens,
even if it's an emotional abandonment,
what happens is we end up then trying to modify ourselves
so that we can be loved.
So we're going with this underlying belief
that I'm not worthy, I'm not enough.
Now what happens is the key to this is actually,
'cause you are source energy, you are light,
that's what you naturally are.
The key is just to unplug that, of the bulb,
that says, "I'm not worthy, and I'm not enough."
You know, I used to work in,
I used to do something called forensics debate
back in high school.
And what I would do is this, it was,
you would either debate for a certain topic,
or you'd be a critique against a certain topic.
You didn't get to pick what side you were on.
So for example, one of the topics
that I had to debate when I was in it,
and you go to these competitions,
was like juveniles charged with violent crimes
should be charged and punished as adults.
That was the resolution.
Now, if you were pro, you had to show why that is true.
If you were negative, you'd have to critique
why that is not true.
Well, the job of the negative
is to just show that the positive is not true.
It's not to like necessarily uphold a new perspective.
In the same way with this video,
the goal that I have is to prove to you
that you are worthy by showing you,
and breaking down the belief that you're not worthy.
And to do that, there is another analogy,
or another way of explaining this,
that I find extremely powerful.
And that is understanding that metaphor that I was using,
of this right here, of just unplugging,
literally unscrewing the bulb that says,
"There's something wrong with me."
Now to do this, there's a simple
four-step process you can use.
It comes from Byron Katie, it's called The Work.
And it's four simple questions that begin to,
one, dismantle the limiting belief
that says you're not worthy,
but two, what it does, is it gets you to see
who you would be without it.
You stop identifying with the bulb.
You see what happens in the past,
we had these bulbs that were screwed in
either by other people,
or maybe we screwed it in a little bit too,
based on meaning.
But what happens is then it stays there.
And then what we're trying to do
is we're trying to become better.
I wanna say I am worthy,
but what we do is we start plugging in
these different bulbs without first off
taking out the bulbs that say we're not worthy.
You see, this is the game changer.
And in my life, when I was feeling the most not worthy,
it was when I was starting
to become aware of my own shadow,
where I realized that when I was a kid,
I felt neglected and abandoned.
So what I did is I tried modifying myself
to get validation from other people.
I went so far as to when I was dating women,
I would try my best to like give myself up.
In the beginning, there'd be like a certain energy dynamic,
but then I'd give myself up as the relationship got closer,
or it got deeper,
so that I could then gain that validation and love,
and I would change myself.
I wasn't in my own frame.
And then also I had ADHD.
I thought there was something wrong with me.
People'd say, "You have so much energy,
what's wrong with you?"
Many of you may know this story,
but I used to work at Barneys New York in women's shoes,
Nordstrom's in women's shoes.
And I also had a self-image that says
that I wasn't worthy 'cause I worked a shoe sales job,
that I didn't enjoy, and I identified with that.
But then eventually what I did
is I became aware of that ADHD belief that I had,
and realized that people just told me I had a lot of energy.
I unplugged that bulb, and realized
I just had, people told me
that there was something wrong with my energy,
so what I did is I unplugged that bulb
that said there was something wrong with me.
And I started meditating.
That completely changed my energy.
So the key to what I've tried to share with you,
it's like unplug the meaning you've given to the past,
and the bulb that most of us have that is holding us back
is a belief that says, "I'm not worthy.
I'm not enough."
And the four simple step process, this is all we have to do.
You guys ready?
All we have to do is we have to ask these four questions.
The first one is, "Is it true?"
This is from Byron Katie, The Work, "Is it true?"
And we started looking, "Well, I'm not enough."
Is it true?
Well, sometimes we'll say, "Yes, it is true."
We'll believe that thought so much,
we say, "Yes, it is true."
And then the second question is,
"Can I absolutely know 100%, like no doubt at all,
that it is true?"
That's the question that we normally get to a place
where we say, "You know what?
Now that I really think about it, am I not enough?"
You know, I had this couple experiences when I was younger,
where it really reflected back that I wasn't enough.
I felt abandoned, but there were times that I was enough.
And then what happens is the third question is,
"Who would I be without that thought?"
Now here's an interesting thing that happens.
At this point, we begin to separate our identity
from the thought that says, "I'm not worthy."
Think about that.
So we're looking at that, then we're like,
"Oh, I'm not enough."
That's just a thought we've been believing.
Think about that.
The stories we tell ourselves that happened in our past
were keeping us in a certain mind frame,
where we thought we weren't enough.
They were just stories.
Let me ask you a question,
how does it feel to believe that story?
I used to believe the story I wasn't enough
because of my painful past,
of my ex-stepmom that was abusive,
that wired in and self-image that I wasn't enough.
And then there was that of the ADHD,
feeling that there's something wrong with me.
Once again, there's something wrong with me.
I'm not enough.
Getting rejected when I first approached a girl,
when I was 13, 14 years old,
I asked an 18 year old to go out with me, she rejected me.
I felt like I wasn't enough.
These reference experiences
were stories that I then attached to.
Oh this is the way it works.
But of course, the key to this process for me
was healing, forgiving my ex-stepmom,
and realizing that I could give my past a new meaning.
It made me stronger.
And when I gave it a new meaning,
I then got a new effect out of it.
Many of you know, that I've shared before,
there's the consciousness,
like the different levels of consciousness,
there's a level of reasoning.
And then from the level of reasoning,
above that is love, and then joy, peace, and enlightenment.
Now, reasoning is the intellect of the mind.
That's like Alan Watts, it's classical music.
Now what happens is when we believe we're not worthy,
there's a story, there's a meaning there
that says I'm not enough, there's something wrong with me.
And because of that story, it's then on autopilot.
The key to this though,
is being aware of the story, seeing it as a story,
and then making a new meaning, giving it a new meaning.
And once we give it a new meaning,
or we just completely neglect the meaning,
and we're just being present to the moment,
that's when then we start to become free.
We start to infuse more light into ourselves.
We literally become that of looking at those bulbs
that are right there.
We become the pure source energy that's flowing through it.
And we don't have any bulbs
that are diffusing that energy.
Now, a lot of this worthiness
comes from inner child wounding,
that we believe we're unworthy.
So the key is knowing that you are worthy,
and the key to knowing that
is breaking down the belief that you're not worthy.
Is it true? Can I absolutely know that it's true?
Who would I be?
And how do I act when I believe that thought?
How do I believe and act
when I believe that thought or that story?
Well, I hold myself small, I don't boldly be myself
when I'm in public.
I am feeling like guilty, when I say no to things
I really, when I say yes to things
I really don't wanna do.
Or yet, so you see it's becoming aware of that.
And then the fourth step to this process
is who would you be without that thought?
So it's how do you think when you,
how do you act and feel when you believe it?
Who would you be without it?
Oh my gosh, I would be like so free.
I would feel worthy, I would be present to the moment.
I wouldn't be identified with the past.
I wouldn't care what people thought so much.
I would be myself more boldly.
You see, this is the key to understanding worthiness.
You have value for just being you.
You don't need any reason at all.
The reasoning of the mind is cool and everything,
those are beliefs and our stories about reality.
We can change our beliefs and stories about reality,
and we will then experience new things in our life.
But the key to this is letting go of the reasons.
You are not worthy if you have the perfect relationship,
you are not worthy if you have this perfect job,
and you have everything working out for you.
No, you're worthy because you exist.
Think about it like this,
everything in this reality has a purpose.
Looking out this window, there are these trees.
There's beautiful air, there's oxygen.
There's these bees that are cross-pollinating
these different plants like, and creating all of this stuff.
It all has a purpose.
Now what happens is when we say, "Yeah,
I guess I can see how everything has a purpose
but I do not have a purpose."
Everything, by reality, has value just for being itself.
It has a purpose, and it is here to be.
In the same way, you don't need any other reason
to be anything.
You are worthy for just being you.
Existence and creation does not make mistakes.
Bashar talks a lot about this.
Existence does not make mistakes.
Everything has a purpose.
So if we say, "Well, I'm the one mistake.
I'm the one thing that doesn't have purpose,
and that isn't worthy."
That's a way that we feel significant (laughing).
That's a way that we justify our past.
That's the way we justify the reasoning in our mind
as to why we've experienced what we did.
But guess what?
We are giving up happiness at the expense of being right.
How many times have we said,
"Oh, well, this justifies my past, this justifies this."
Okay, maybe you're right, but is it worth it
at the expense of happiness, at the expense of it?
So the thing that I wanna encourage you to know
is that you have value for just being you.
There's something, there's a unique quality about you
that nobody else is like in the world.
Maybe there's people that are somewhat similar in some ways,
but you, being the unique part of you,
all you have to do is be yourself, be authentic,
and realize that within.
People feel what you feel about you.
You are worthy, you have value,
for just being you, that's it.
Not for what you do for living,
not for how much value you add to other people.
You are worthy for just being you.
Creation does not make mistakes.
You exist right now, you will always exist.
Energy cannot be created nor destroyed.
It's remembering that, feeling safety in that statement,
and then also at the same time,
realizing that anytime you believe you're not enough,
it's just because you believe
there's something wrong with you,
because there's an old story, there's no thought coming up
that's keeping you in that mentality.
So with that, there is a meditation
that can help you with this.
It's an inner child meditation,
where we go energetically to Kauai, Hawaii.
We heal our own inner child.
We talk and dialogue with our own inner child.
It's one of the most powerful meditations I've ever made.
It's completely free.
You can hit the link below to check that out.
Also, what you could do
is you can go to aarondoughty.com/child,
S-H-I-L-D, that's the child meditation, check that out.
And under 14 minutes, that's the proof that you are worthy.
We've broken down the proof and the belief that you're not.
And that's the key to this process.
So with that being said, I'll see you on the next episode.
Subscribe if you haven't already,
like this video if you feel worthy,
and I'll talk to you in the next one.
Peace, much love, and namaste.
(serene music)