>>> YOU'RE WATCHING "THE MUSIC MAN" ON
TURNER CLASSIC MOVIES. SO YOU'RE EITHER AN OLD WOMAN OR
A YOUNG GAY MAN. [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE ]
♪♪♪ >> MASON!
MASON! >> WHY, HELLO THERE, WINTHROP.
>> WHEN DO YOU THINK US KIDS ARE GOING TO RECEIVE OUR SPECIAL
MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS? >> WELL, I GUESS WINTHROP'S
STILL WORKING ON THAT LIST. >> SAY IT TO MY FACE, BITH!
[ LAUGHTER ] >> WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, WOAH!
OKAY, EASY, WINTHROP. I THINK EVERYONE'S JUST A LITTLE
EXCITED ABOUT THESE INSTRUMENTS. [ DINGING ]
>> OH, AND LISTEN! THAT COULD BE THEM ARRIVING
RIGHT NOW. ♪ OH THE WELLS FARGO WAGON
IS COMING DOWN THE STREET PLEASE LET IT BE FOR ME ♪
♪ OH THE WELLS FARGO WAGON IS COMING DOWN THE STREET
I WISH I WISH I KNEW WHAT IT COULD BE ♪
♪ I GOT A BOX OF MAPLE SUGAR ON MY BIRTHDAY
IN MARCH I GOT A GREY MACKINAW ♪
♪ AND ONCE I GOT A GRAPEFRUIT FROM TAMPA ♪
♪ MONTGOMERY WARD SENT ME A BATHTUB AND A
CROSS-CUT SAW ♪ ♪ OH-HO THE WELLS FARGO
WAGON IS COMING DOWN THE STREET ♪
♪ OH PLEASE LET IT BE FOR ME ♪
♪ IT COULD BE SOMETHING FOR SOMEONE WHO IS NO RELATION ♪
♪ OR IT COULD BE SOMETHING VERY VERY SPECIAL NOW
JUST FOR ME ♪ [ DINGING ]
>> OOH. >> OOH.
>> WELL, HELLO, RIVER CITY! >> OUR INSTRUMENTS!
>> DO YOU HAVE MY CLARINET? >> YEAH, WHAT ABOUT MY FLUTE OR
WHATEVER? >> WELLS FARGO'S GOT SOMETHING
EVEN BETTER THAN INSTRUMENTS. THEY'RE CALLED BANK ACCOUNTS!
[ LAUGHTER ] AND I'M GIVING EVERYONE AT LEAST
THREE OF THEM! >> YEAH!
WAIT, WHAT? >> THAT'S RIGHT.
EVERYONE GETS A BANK ACCOUNT. LIKE WHAT'S YOUR NAME, SON?
>> WINTHROP. >> OKAY, WHAT'S YOUR NAME?
[ LAUGHTER ] >> SALLY!
>> THAT'S ONE ACCOUNT FOR YOU, SALLY, AND FOR YOUR DOG.
>> SIR, I DON'T THINK THESE CHILDREN OR THEIR DOGS NEED BANK
ACCOUNTS. >> OH, SURE THEY DO.
IN FACT, THIS WHOLE TOWN NEEDS BANK ACCOUNTS, LIKE YOU, SIR AND
YOU, MA'AM, AND THIS SKINNY GENTLEMAN OVER HERE.
>> THAT'S A MAIL BOX. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS, SIR? >> YOU KNOW WHAT A QUOTA IS,
KID? A QUOTA IS A TARGET I NEED TO
HIT OR I'M A DEAD MAN. SO, WHAT DO YOU SAY?
DO YOU WANT TO KILL ME? OR DO YOU WANT TO SHUT AND UP
GET A CREDIT CARD? >> BUT SIR, YOU'RE SWINDLING
CUSTOMERS, ISN'T THAT FRAUD? >> IS IT A FROG?
NO, IT'S A CREDIT CARD. >> I SAID FRAUD, I THINK YOU
HEARD ME SAY "FRAUD." >> EVERYONE HATES THIS KID,
RIGHT? [ LAUGHTER ]
>> WELL, I THINK THE BOY'S RIGHT.
>> YES, IF WELLS FARGO KEEPS DOING THIS, THEY'RE GOING TO GET
INTO TROUBLE, TROUBLE, TROUBLE, TROUBLE TROUBLE.
>> SHUT THE HELL UP! [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE ]
YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND THE PRESSURE I'M UNDER!
THESE WELLS FARGO GUYS ARE JACKALS.
AS A MATTER OF FACT -- THEY TOOK MY DAUGHTER.
>> NO THEY DIDN'T. >> OKAY.
YOU GOT ME. SALES TECHNIQUE.
BUT COME ON, YOU'VE GOT TO HELP ME OUT ON THIS.
IF I HAVE TO FACE MY BOSS TOMORROW WITH NOTHING, I'LL
SHIPOOPI IN MY PANTS. ♪♪♪
>> HEY, MISTER. I'LL TAKE ONE BANK ACCOUNT,
PLEASE. >> WOW.
I WAS ALL WRONG ABOUT YOU, KID. YOU'RE A REAL PAL.
THAT'S WHY I'M ALSO GOING TO GIVE YOU SOMETHING CALLED AN
EXPLODING MORTGAGE. THAT SOUNDS PRETTY COOL, HUH?
>> SURE DOES! >> YOU'VE GOT TO LEARN HOW TO
TALK, MAN. I'M, LIKE, DRENCHED.
♪♪♪ ♪ IT COULD BE SOMETHING FOR
SOMEONE WHO IS NO RELATION ♪ ♪ OR IT COULD BE
YES IT COULD BE YES YOU'RE RIGHT
IT SURELY COULD BE ♪ >> OH, ON THE WAY IN I RAN OVER
THREE KIDS. ♪ JUST FOR ME ♪
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] >> WELLS FARGO!
SOWWY! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]