Well, I'll never forget it.
The enemy had us pinned down on all sides
The snipers had taken out Tommy and Seán.
Their bodies lay strewn in the dirt
only six bullets between us
My hands were so sweaty
I could barely hold the controller.
I should have been there for you.
You couldn't have done anything.
Your Wi-Fi was down.
I know. I know.
but sure didn't we win the very next game.
Oh sure we did and what was it we used to say again?
Winner Winner Chicken Dinner!
That's right.
Good man yourself.
Ah simpler times.
Ah they were.
Sure even the Guinness tasted better back then.
Sure they've been watering down the Guinness for years.
Have they now?
Ah I'd say so.
Well cheers.
Cheers.
It's good to see you again.
Do you have any regrets Johnny?
What do you mean?
In life I mean.
I always wanted to see
The Lying Tower of Pisa
But I'm too old now
Oh, listen, I tell you what
I spent my entire life learning ten different languages
and then they come along with this universal translator
"Et maintenant ils ont cette traduction universelle..."
Ah will you shut up?
Do you remember when they thought A.I. would take over and kill us all?
Ah would you get a grip.
Ah sure my AI barista can't even get my coffee order right.
And he never ever writes my name correctly.
Look at this one.
Intellegence huh?
Artificial idiots.
Did you hear the last mosquito died this morning in Glasgow zoo?
Little Bertha?
Sure they couldn't get her to mate.
Ah no.
How's the family?
Oh Jane is not taking to Mars at all.
She thought the Red Planet would be a lot hotter.
Right.
We have been arguing 25/7.
Well come here to me.
Does she want tickets to the concert hall this Friday?
Oh it's classical composer season
I've got three tickets to see the complete works
of Cardi B in C minor.
Oh, that should be lovely.
Alright well give us her number there.
And I'll drop her a line.
Yeah, yeah Okay so its...
087
9275579
0797
55
99 5
Quan.
Sure it's mad the way years ago
They never knew a number existed
between seven and eight.
I know yeah yeah
Oh did I tell you I finally managed how to use
the tik-tok thing.
Good man youself.
I'll show you here.
I cannot get reception on this thing
for love nor crypto-currency.
Come here, did you hear the news?
Apparently Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston
were both spotted going into the same space shuttle.
Do you think they might get back together?
Well, I don't know I'd say we'd be sooner waiting
on the third coming of Christ to be honest.
Did you see the Shawshank Redemption?
The original?
No, no the remake with Jack Black and Lindsay Lohan?
No, but I'll have plenty of time to watch movies in my retirement
Well, if they ever stop upping the retirement age
I know, what is it now 98?
Ah they should have left it at ninety quan
I know.
Well better get back to work
Me too. Back to the grind stone.
Hey Youtube
So a lot of my followers have been asking where I got my tracksuit from.
Today I will be reviewing the pint at this Irish bar
On Mars
Doomdah!
Thank very much for watching we are Foil Arms and Hog
We've new videos every Thursday and we would love it if you would subscribe to our channel.
We're going to Derry this weekend.
And then we're off to Kerry.
We're touring our live show all over Ireland.
And aren't we going to Britain.
Ah we are all over the place to be honest
Manchester and Portsmouth and Southend and what not.
Beautiful places.
Names are written around here somewhere do I do all the work for you?
You should come along the boys did do a good show.
This man is very handsome isn't he?
You should shave.
What is this designer stubble?
What's this where are the sleeves gone?
If I had hair like you now I'd let it...
Ah it's beautiful.
Come here will we do the Doomdah?
I would love a doomdah now.
Right here we go.
Doomdah!
Anyway cheers
It was shaving foam.
Shaving foam. Are you happy? I ate shaving foam.
Ah you are not even on camera for it.
Sacrificed.
For so little.
Aw it's in his mouth! It's in his mouth!
It's like I've got Rabies.