(audience cheering)
- You been on this show for 18 seasons
Nick Cannon is still rich and you are broke.
(audience laughing)
This [beep] is keeping all your money,
my brother stay woke.
(audience cheers)
(points dinging)
(air horn blasting)
- Who the mother sucker
♪ up beat music ♪
(audience cheering and laughing)
- eat that ass up,
♪ Drum music ♪
- That's - that's what it look like
- eat that ass up
- Let's go!
- Do the world cup goal celebration.
(audience cheers)
(point dings)
- Ladies and gentlemen, of the Kingdom Zamunda
I'd like to welcome my son, Michael Blackson.
He's the prince. Today is his birthday.
Strippers, DJ,
drops a hot beat by OG Parker right now -
lets go.
(audience cheering)
♪ Hip hop music ♪
- (Group) Yeah, yeah, yeah, aye!
Twerk it for the prince,
twerk, twerk it for the prince
- Turn up!
- (audience) Ayy!
- Twerk it for the prince, twerk,
twerk it for the prince.
- (audience) Ayy!
Twerk it for the prince, twerk
twerk it for the prince!
- What sis? He about to be king
I'm twerkin' for the prince
yeah I'm workin' for the prince.
Feed him grapes, yeah, even iron shirts up for the prince
- I ain't twerkin' for the prince
- No!
- Pull up in the Cadi
and the prince real ugly he look like his damn daddy!
Yo!
(audience cheers)
- I'm the prince and I'm doin' my thing
- (audience) Ayy!
- All these girls twerkin' I can't wait to be king, yeah!
- Twerk it for the prince, twerk it
twerk it for the prince
- Stop! Twerkin' for the prince, stop it
(record stops)
- I just got a text from the village, this ugly (beep)
not my son
(audience laughs and applauds)
Stop twerkin', twerk for me -
there it go lady, put the beat back on!
Twerk for me!
- (male and female rapping together) Twerk it for the king
twerk, twerk it for the king
twerk it for the king, twerk
twerk it for the king
twerk it for the king, twerk
twerk it for the king
- (indistinct)
- Why sis? 'cause he really the king
(points dinging)
(audience cheering)
(air horn blows)
- Your topic is African Culture
♪ Hip hop beat ♪
- Shootin' my animal, I'm shootin' my animal
shootin' my animal, now you wild out!
- Wakanda forever! Wakanda forever!
Wakanda forever! Now you wild out!
- I'm wearin' a 'gator, I'm wearin' a 'gator
I'm wearin' a 'gator, now you wild out!
- (spits)
(audience and stage members laughing and cheering)
(spit sounds)
Now you wild out!
(audience laughing)
(points ding)
- Bow bow black sheep!
- Ay!
- In a black jeep! With the black seats
- Hey!
(indistinct)
- Motha suckaaa
- He's so Black!
- We Black motha suckaaa, we so Black!
- Hold up, hold up, hold up
Look - I'm so black
you gotta talk to me at the right time
so Black that if I wear black I'll look
naked at nighttime
- Woo!
(audience cheers)
- I'm Black, hey! My skin got me on a hurt mission,
I'm not food but if I was food, I'm so Black
I'd be jerk chicken.
(audience cheers)
- Hey!
- I gotta say I'm Black like every time
if my skin had a clock on it, it'll be 11:59.
- (audience) Hey!
- Hey! Ain't nobody do it better! I'm Black!
My skin! Lookin' like the newest leather!
- (audience) Hey!
- Bow bow black sheep, in a black jeep!
With the black seats
- Hey!
- We back, motha suckaaa!
- We so Black!
We Black motha suckaaa! We so Black!
- We Black, motha suckaaa!
(audience cheering)
- Red squad, are we ready!?
(audience cheers and applauds)
- The Red Squad, wild out!
- Pledges...
- (group together) Hoo!
- Big Brother Canon is watching us don't let me down.
(audience laughing)
- Lock up!
1 - 2 - 3 - 4 -
(audience cheering and laughing)
♪ Whoa, we finally made the show ♪
♪ So many times we heard no ♪
♪ But not we finally wild'n out - Stop! ♪
Lean...
(audience cheers and applauds)
- Pledges, unlock!
(audience laughs)
- Whoo! They wanna know,
Mr. Black, how'd you get on this show?
- They don't know I'm here
I close my eyes and I walk right in this bitch.
(audience laughing and clapping)
- This my cousin Adjwa and (beep) (indistinct)
(audience laughs and cheers)
(audience clapping to beat)
But with those (beep) she could feed my
whole damn village.
(audience laughs)
- ♪ Yeah, you, yo, (scatting) ♪
(buzzer)
(indistinct singing)
(audience cheering and applauding)
- There is a colonizer! (shoots spit)
(point dings)
(audience cheers and laughs)
(audience cheering loudly)
- I love a woman with a fat ass
(audience laughs)
Every time we make love all you hear is
'blat-blat-blat-blat-blat-blat-blat-blat-blat-blat'
(audience laughing)
'blat-blat-blat-blat-blat'
(points dinging)
(audience cheering)
- The battle is: Jess Hilarious versus
Michael Blackson
(audience cheering)
(audience laughs)
- (beep) you, mother (beep)
(audience laughing)
I used to be a fan. I wanted to (beep) you
but I found out you were a man
(audience laughing)
- (beep) you look like me
(audience laughing)
I ain't gonna run, I'm just gonna tell you
how Black you is
(audience laughing)
You look like under the bed
Stevie Wonder sees you every day
(audience laughing)
- Okay! Okay mother(beep), okay
I am Black as (shit), but please don't hate.
I got one confession - this accent is fake.
And I'm really from Philly for real, and I'm not even
African, I'm just Black as (shit) so,
that's just what it is.
(audience clapping and laughing hysterically)
Ha ha!
- (beep) you (beep)
(audience and stage members laughing)
Ya mom and ya pop is the same mother(beep) you
(audience cheering)
- And your winner is...
Jess Hilarious,
(point dings)
the Michael Blackson version
(audience cheering and applauding)
♪ Hip hop beat ♪
- Hey, hey, wild sauce
Beauty, you a beast
- (audience) wild sauce!
- But your girl is my (beep)
- (laughing) Wild sauce
You play soccer with bare feet!
- (audience) wild sauce!
- Yo - Your girl look like my (beep)
- (audience) Wild sauce!
(laughing)
(buzzer)
(audience wooing)
- Wild sauce!
- I got this
(audience laughing and cheering)
♪ Slow jam beat ♪
(audience laughing and clapping)
Turn this music off!
(audience laughing)
(music stops)
I don't have to say a word.
(audience laughs)
Just look at me!
(audience laughing)
- (laughing) 'Silence of the Lambs'?
(audience cheering and clapping)
Uh, when - 'When Darkness Falls'?
(audience laughing and clapping)
(buzzer)
(audience and stage members laughing)
- You all ready?
- You bet your (beep)!
(audience laughing)
- All right, (indistinct)
- You are built like a 12 year-old lesbian!
(audience laughing)
- Boy if you don't get your God Damn - (spit)
'the food's ready' lookin' ass boy I'll - (indistinct)
- You have tattoos of all the (beep)
you owe money to!
(audience cheers and laughs)
- You don't get your bad coat, thriller-dancin'
lookin' ass - and guess what!
You ain't even need makeup, stupid ass boy!
(audience cheering)
- D C stands for (beep) chaser!
- (audience) Ooo!
- Guess what?
- What?
- In your car, I bet you ain't got (indistinct)
on the floor -
yabba-dabba-doo feet havin' ass (beep)!
(audience laughing)
- Kiss my ass, motha sucka! You-
(timer buzzes)
(audience and stage members cheer)
(applause)
- Give me Brett Michaels, Brett Michales
(audience cheers)
On the route!
- You fat bitch!
(audience laughing)
You are eight months pregnant!
(audience laughing)
- If you don't get your God Damn last citizen
of Wakanda so the Black Panther has been
stripped away!
(audience cheering and clapping)
- Every time you walk, your legs talk to each other!
They say 'you let me pass', ' I let you by'
'you let me pass', ' I let you by'
'it's my turn', 'it's my turn'
'it's the other turn', 'wait a minute!'
(beep) you, mother(beep)!
Kiss my ass!
- Woo, woo! (grunts and yells)
(audience cheering and shouting)
♪ Hip hop beat ♪
- Shut up, everybody!
Turn that music off!
(music stops)
Hey, listen
Come here, skinny bastard.
(audience laughs)
Look at this skinny (beep) .
You look like a healthy crack head.
(audience laughing)
Big ass lips, I bet you can whisper in your
own ears (mumbling sounds).
(audience laughing)
(point dings)
- Okay, okay, okay!
- Kiss my ass, (beep)
He look like a Rick Ross starter kit.
(audience laughing hysterically)
- Wait a minute, wait a minute!
I bet you be in the village,
with a sharp ass spear.
You be behind bushes like -
(together) 'I'm bout to make that lion bring that ass here'
(audience cheering)
- Shut up! Shut up don't laugh at them!
You are not my type of woman, you are too skinny.
Me and you together, would start a fire
(audience laughing)
(point dings)
♪ Hip hop beat ♪
- I seen all your movies, you's a bad actor,
but your hairline so far back
it's still in Africa.
(audience wooing and laughing)
(point dings)
- Try again, motha sucka!
(audience laughs)
Kill the music, please, DJ, I don't need -
(record stops)
- Let's do this
- I don't need peace -
I don't need peace in my villa-
I don't want you.
- Naw, naw-
- You are a Z-list actor, get out of here, please.
(audience cheering)
- Who got one? Stevie J, come here my brother.
Come here.
- I got you
(audience laughing and clapping)
- I had to Google you to see what you do,
they say you is a hit maker but this motha
sucka ain't make a hit since '92.
(audience laughing and clapping)
(point dings)
Stevie J!
- I got you, (beep) you mean,-
(in accent) this is my lost cousin, listen
(audience laughing)
I have a, secret.
We went to a restaurant, and I ordered my chicken fried.
He ordered his chicken alive.
(audience applause and laughing)
(point dings)
I want to kill him myself, motha sucka!
(audience laughing)
- Conceited! You've been on this show for 20 years!
Aren't you bored?!
Nick Canon, give him a Wild'n Out achievement award!
(audience laughing)
(point dings)
- Let me see that gap in 'ya mouth, smile!
- No!
- Yes!
- No!
- When you do I know you hatin' it.
Those teeth are so far apart they in
a long distance relationship!
(audience cheering and laughing)
- Hold on!
(point dings)
- Hold on!
- Hold up motha sucka! Come here! Come. Here! And you -
come here you punk bitch!
Look at this bootleger Migos!
You ain't Quavo, you Jose!
(audience laughing)
(point dings)
You ain't Offset, you Off-White!
(audience laughing)
You ain't Takeoff,
(point dings)
you run away!
(audience cheering and laughing)
(point dings)
- Michael Blackson,
you so dark it look like somebody threw some
fire at'cha.
Ya hair so nappy, I know when you comb it
it sound like firecrackers.
(audience laughing and wooing)
(point dings)
- Shut up! Everybody, shut up!
(audience laughing)
Look at this short (beep)!
You are shorter than my scene in the movie
'Next Friday'.
(audience 'Oo-ing')
(point dings)
Come here, motha sucka!
- I'm on yo ass!
- You look like a thug and a nerd
(audience laughs)
You gonna rob me or e-mail me, motha(beep)?
(audience laughs)
(point dings)
Look at this (beep)!
He look like Future's past.
(audience cheering)
(point dings)
Hit me, holler, you're my peeps.
But how you a gangsta rapper with a
mouth full of baby teeth?
(audience laughing)
(point dings)
- Hold up, Michael Blackson!
Let me make one thing clear!
You so black at night, when you blink
you disappear!
(point dings)
- I'm gonna start with this brother lookin' like
Drake with a concussion, come here.
(audience laughs)
(point dings)
Come here! Lookin' like a unsuccessful Joe Buttons!
(audience cheering)
(point dings)
Come here! Hurry up and buy!
(point dings)
(audience laughs)
(performer laughs)
Fat brother, come here!
This guy has stomach and titties,
happy Father's Day and Mother's Day,
motha sucka!
(point dings)
(audience wailing and cheering)
- You are shorter than a (beep) with no legs
(audience laughing)
This (beep) has his face and his feet on his license.
(audience laughing)
(point dings)
- Yo Nick, why would you bring somebody this
Black my way?
I mean this (beep) so dark, he probably only
shop on Black Friday.
(point dings)
(audience cheers)
- Look at this (beep)!
Somebody poured bleach on Rick Ross!
Jacques Itch! Please, come here.
- (laughing) Jacques Itch
(audience and stage members laughing)
- You have 11 kids, either your pull out game is weak,
- (audience) Ooo!
- Or you need some love
But by the way your grandma face is set up,
I think you just need some hug.
- Ay, back up, back up
(point dings)
(audience laughs)
- Excuse me, excuse me.
Michael Blackson.
Nothing you just said was funny at all.
You're standing up here looking like a
dark chocolate disco ball.
(audience laughing and cheering)
(point dings)
- Ayo, check out-
you need to chill and tell him to stop
he a no-win,
this boy Jacques up here with them damn
braids women be havin' under they sew-ins.
(audience laughing and woo-ing)
(point dings)
- Yeah!
- I want your leader!
- I'm here.
- Nick Canon, you think you're slick
comin' up with Wild'n Out.
You only have rappers on this show so you
can help you finally put an album out.
(audience cheering)
(point dings)
(audience applause)
- Hold on. Hold on.
Michael Blackson,
you really shouldn't say another word,
if you created Facebook, your name would
be Dark Zuckerberg.
(point dings)
- Since you dress like a disco ball
I'm about to get my dance on.
How dare you come on live TV
without any pants on?
(point dings)
(audience cheers)
- Shut up! Don't laugh at his -
- Yeah!
- I want Carlos (indistinct)
come here, please.
- (audience) Woo!
- You been on this show for 18 seasons,
Nick Canon is still rich and you are broke.
This (beep) keeping all your money,
by brother, stay woke.
(audience cheering and laughing hysterically)
(points ding)
(air horn blows)
- Little (beep), come here
You think you have bars, that is-
not all of that.
I would battle you face-to-face,
but you only reach up to my (beep) sack.
(audience cheers)
(point dings)
_ Michael Blackson, everything you said
that's tragic. You so dark, if you was a
magician, it would only be Black Magic.
(audience cheers)
(point dings)
- Turn that (beep) off!
♪ Hip hop beat ♪
(record stops)
- In my village, we rap in a-cappella!
(audience laughs)
Where's that red-bone (beep)
Nick Canon?
- Uh-oh.
- (laughing) Right here!
- (audience) whoa
- They say once you go Black, you never go back.
But when it come to Mariah you make us all
look like a bunch of liars!
(audience laughing hysterically)
- (beep)!
(point dings)
- Kiss my ass, your whole team!
Look at this dirty (beep)!
This (beep) took a bath and lost weight!
(audience laughing)
- Hold up, Hold up, boy!
(point dings)
- Hold up!
- Get out the way!
- Look, Rush Hour 8!
(audience cheers)
(point dings)
(applause)
- Wait a minute! (laughs)
- This (beep) here. This (beep) is shorter than
Amber Rose ponytail.
- Oh!
(point dings)
(audience cheers)
(indistinct yelling)
- Hold up, Michael Blackson
You the same color as Coca-Cola,
man everybody take two steps I believe
this (beep) got Ebola.
(audience laughing)
(point dings)
(record scratching)
- Kiss my ass! Turn that off!
(audience laughs)
This (beep) has no bank account.
This is how he transfer money from his savings
to his checking:
(money scratching)
(audience wailing)
(applause)
(points dinging)
(indistinct chatter)
(grand applause)
- (indistinct) Motha sucka!
♪ Hip hop beat ♪
- Hold up, motha (beep)!
Hold up, turn that (beep) off my (beep).
(record stops)
Jess, bring your ass here.
I'm not gonna front, you lookin' kind of fine.
But without that wig, you look like Nick Canon
from 'Drum Line'.
(audience cheering)
(point dings)
Come here, my (beep)!
Look like Jake from StateFarms
(audience laughs)
God Damn, (beep), you look like,
my left nut. I hit-
I hope none of your dreams come true, bitch.
(laughing)
- Wait wait, you said - you said
Bobby remind you of your nut(beep)
- My left nut
- Is that what you think?
My (beep) you so Black I bet you (beep) ink!
(audience cheers)
(point dings)
- Hold up, motha suckas.
Jess used to look like Donkey from Shrek.
Now that you got a new hairstyle and new booty,
then wild out would be doin' real good with them checks.
(audience laughing)
Come here.
(point dings)
Come here, you-
- Nooo!
- Hold up-
- Whoa! No! Shut. Up!
- I'm listening.
- We don't know if you young or old!
- Uh-huh!
- You remind me of Instagram,
the dark mode!
(audience laughing)
- Shut up. Them thick-ass glasses,
when is Jesus coming?
(point dings)
(audience laughing hysterically)
I'm trying to get my life together!
(applause)
This (beep) got prescription windshields,
shut up!