Dark greetings everyone, and welcome to the first episode
of After the Shadows, a show created just for you, the fans,
where we talk about what we just did in the shadows!
I'm your host Harvey Guillén.
I'm super excited to be here with you all.
We have a bat-tastic show lined up for you today.
So let's get started.
[UPBEAT SPANISH GUITAR]
I first want to quickly recap everything that happened.
After being involved in the killing of the entire Vampiric
Council of the Tri-state Area, the gang is understandably
worried for their lives.
Not only do they still have this lingering death
sentence on their heads, but Guillermo
is a full blown slayer!
That's pretty cool!
So there's that.
OK, well that being said, I think
it's time we brought on our special guest for this evening.
A great entertainer, a great humanitarian, and my dear
friend of over 50 years.
Ladies and gentlemen, miss Kristen Schall!
Hey!
Thanks, Harvey.
Big fan of the show.
No, no, I'm a fan of yours.
Like I think we--
When we first met, I was just fanboying over you,
just because I'm such a fan of all your work.
Oh yeah, maybe.
You didn't really let that on.
No, I think I did.
My memory is, you rolled up with the cash from My Spy,
and we got in your special car, because you
had a driver because you were doing press all day.
Harvey is like, high-end.
And we went to the wrap party, and you and I just
danced on the dance floor with all the nine-year-old kids
also in the cast.
But I didn't think that you were a fan.
I just thought we were soulmates.
That's what I meant by that.
I meant that we were soulmates as soon as we met.
[LAUGHTER]
It's been a while since we saw the guide since season one.
So she's back for season three.
What has happened in that time?
Like what personally has happened with her?
I mean has the wholesale slaughter of her employers and
masters changed her in any way?
Yeah, why wasn't she at the opera, or whatever?
She wasn't invited to opera.
[INAUDIBLE] wasn't invited.
Yeah, what has she been up to?
I mean clearly, she's been hanging with the wraiths.
They're sort of her--
that's her family, is the wraiths.
Wait, does the guide have a last name?
People called her the Floating Woman, because they think--
that's how she's credited.
But her real name in all the scripts and everything
is the guide, period.
And I love that.
I love that there's not a real name.
I love the mystique.
And I had the same thing, because I played
a character called Number Two for the Mysterious Benedict
Society.
And there's something about not having a name
that actually makes the characters richer for me.
We also have other storylines.
Like have that Nandor is wooing his romantic interest,
which is super fun.
We find out that Colin Robinson wants
to know where energy vampires come from,
so he's on a self journey.
And the best part is that both Nadja
and Laszlo get asked by you, to be the heads
of the Vampiric Council.
Lords and lady, I have assisted every local Vampiric
Council since 1759.
The best of the best!
And now stand charged with assisting you.
Nice.
All right.
And now we have these guys, which is--
whatever.
It's above my pay grade.
She's not excited about it.
She doesn't think that these vampires are up to snuff
to lead the council.
But I think if she had the choice,
she wouldn't have picked them to run it.
Well there you go.
I think that pretty much sums up the first two episodes pretty
nicely, except for the fact that Laszlo
is falling down a rabbit hole with his infatuation
with pornography.
So that's another important thing.
What do you mean?
Like, he's always been infatuated with pornography.
[LAUGHTER]
OK, well I got some questions for you from the audience
they have sent for us.
So--
Are you serious?
They're here?
I thought you said this wasn't live.
This is questions that were asked ahead of time.
(FAKE COUGHING) Fuck off!
OK.
Kristen!
OK.
Here's the first question we want to ask.
How did you train for your role?
We kind of touched about this earlier.
But like, how did you learn to just scuttle up
the side of a building, or how to make
yourself blurry to shadow?
Catching stakes, like all of that.
How do you prep for that?
By the way, did this get cut out?
Or do people recognize this hat, and where
do they recognize it from?
Tweet at me.
Tweet at me and the actor who-- what?
OK, well, here's the thing.
One of the biggest things about preparing for the role
is getting this accent, which was very
nerve-wracking until it hit me that I
couldn't get the accent wrong.
Right?
Because if the vampires are these
mythical made-up characters, so the way they talk,
it doesn't matter.
Like she has an accent because this is her origin,
but she's also eternally alive.
So she's gone through all sorts of walks of life.
So people's accents can change and flux like Madonna.
So that-- as soon as I realized that, I felt more comfortable.
But then again, I will say that there are some--
I need to work on it more, because is that articulated?
And can you understand what the hell she's saying?
Because I already have a lisp, and then you
throw fangs in my mouth, and then you ask me to like,
trill my R's.
I'm just a little nervous.
We cannot allow a human to wander free here, unless
you're making him a vampire.
No chance,
No, absolutely not, no.
That's a real quick answer.
Sorry, Guillermo, there's nothing we can do.
Scoot, scoot!
And the door stays open, I'm--
[DOOR SLAMS]
Bye-bye.
I feel much better about that.
Our last question before we play
our first game of the season is, ready, dramatic pause--
we had over 306 million requests for you
to answer this question.
It's the most important question I've
ever been asked to ask anyone.
So here it is.
What's it like working with me?
[LAUGHTER]
Why are you laughing so loud?
Well, it's always fun to work with Harvey,
because Harvey is always up for being playful.
I feel like you and I just have a good time.
We do, I love having you on set!
Yeah!
We're going to move on to our game.
I'm really excited.
This-- you've heard of a New York minute, right?
So this is In a Staten Island Minute.
What is a New York minute, something quick?
It can happen in a quick minute.
So the whole point of this game--
I'm going to ask you some rapid fire questions
with 60 seconds on the clock.
The goal is for you to answer as many questions
correctly as you can.
Are you ready? Here we go!
One minute on the clock!
OK, vampires are known to sleep in a--
Coffin.
B, that's right!
Next one.
OK, our lead vampires all have the ability
to turn into bats except Colin.
What does Colin turn into?
A, a troll, or B, a gecko?
A, a troll.
[SILLY TONE]
That's wrong, sorry.
Next one!
What was the name of the first literary vampire?
First vampire that appeared in literature.
A, Vampyre John Polidori, or B, Dracula.
Dracula.
[SILLY TONE]
It's Vampyre John Polidori.
All right, moving on to the next one.
Both you and I are friends with Shadows
co-creator Jermaine Clement.
Which of the following is his birthday?
January 10th.
[HAPPY CHIME]
Oh, good one!
Next one.
OK, next question.
In Bob's Burgers episode, Nightmare on Ocean Avenue
Street, your character Louise is dressed as what for Halloween?
A--
A dragon with a girl tattoo.
[HAPPY CHIME] That's correct, moving on!
All right, we got in episode one,
we see your character tell Nadja and Nandor
about their new positions of power within the council.
What--
[BUZZER]
The buzzer went off and you got three right.
But you were reading the questions so slow--
No I wasn't, I was speeding through.
There was a lot of things to get through.
I'm trying to help you here.
I want to win!
I want to win.
So there's something that happened on set, Kristen,
that people don't know.
But you work with animals a lot, all the time.
And we actually had an incident where, well,
something landed on your hat.
And here we have some footage of it.
Can we roll the clip?
Kristen?
Don't move, there's a bird on your head.
Don't move.
Call animal control.
I don't know what number--
MAN: Can we call someone on set?
Call 911.
There's a bird on--
MAN: Don't move, don't move, though.
Don't move, don't move, he looks angry.
Don't move.
Is it going to scratch my head,
it's going to scratch into my brain.
It's starting to peck--
MAN: Yeah.
Something's coming out from the back, but don't worry.
Just, we have to do the scene, we have to do it.
OK.
I love that even with the bird on your head
that was scratching your skull, you decided to still
continue with the scene.
Yeah I mean that's bringing back like a lot of trauma.
So all's well, that ends well, right?
I mean everyone was--
I guess.
Get your own agent, bird!
You know, like stop trying to upstage--
It was trying to upstage you.
Full disclosure, I think one of the producers
talked to the bird before it left.
It might be coming back next season.
On your head.
On my head, exactly.
On your head, Guillermo.
Kristen, people may not know this about you,
but you have an amazing singing voice and a career that people
may not realize-- you were part of a girl group before,
a pretty famous one.
That if we show this clip, people are going
to put two and two together.
So without further ado, let's roll that clip.
[SINGING] Where my girls at?
They're right here.
[OFF-KEY VOCALIZING CONTINUES]
They're right here.
[LAUGHTER]
[SINGING] Ooooh.
Cut.
But how was it?
We just have some rewrites to look into.
Rewrites of the song?
Yeah, It's not working out.
I mean, I can see why you left the group.
But like, I can also be like curious, saying what was that?
Like why did you leave the group?
A lot of rewrites, OK.
And I was starting to lose myself.
You sound great, though.
You still got the moves and everything.
Thanks so much for joining us, Kristen!
This has been amazing!
Congrats on your show!
Wasn't she great?
I love her so much.
OK, now I want to talk about something
that is my personal favorite thing about this show.
It's your art, fan art.
OK, as you famously are aware, we
love to feature fan art from Shadows fans across the globe,
and we're not about to stop now.
So make sure you use the hashtag #AfterTheShadowsFanArt.
That's hashtag #AfterTheShadowsFanArt.
We'll keep an eye out.
Well, that's it.
That's our first episode of After the Shadows.
I want to thank you for watching,
and I want to thank Kristen Schall for being my first guest
this season!
Oh, and also a very special thanks to our sponsor,
human blood, for being so plentiful
and keeping vampires relevant all these years.
Human blood-- it's what's in you!
Good night.
[UPBEAT MUSIC]