Mario: Glitchy? Are you in here?
The oven is jammed with-a spaghetti again!
Huh?
[B-ZAAAAAP]
Mario: Oh, crap!
[inhale]
WOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUHHHH!!!!!!
OOOHHH-HOH-HOH-HOH-HOOOOOOOOHHHHH!!!
[lightning]
Luke: What the hell? Where'd he go?
[fading in] WOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHH!
[SMAK] OOF!
Mario: Oh, jeez, that hurt!
Are my man boobs okay?
Hmm?
Waaah!
Luke: Mario! What are you doing here?
Mario: Who are you?
How do you know me?!
Luke: This may sound weird, but I'm SMG4.
Mario: NO, YOU'RE NOT!
Glitchy isn't Asian!
He has a mustache and a cap, like me!
(but less sexy)
SMG4: Everybody looks like that, though!
Mario: Shuut uup!
What have you done with Glitchy?
You are imposter!
I need to get out of here! SMG4: OH, WAIT!
Mario: *la la la hmm hmm hmmm!
*la! la! la!
*hm-hm hm-hm hmm!
*lalalala la-la la-la
*lalalala hm-hm hm-hm!
SMG4: Mario! What are you doing!
Could you NOT throw food?!
Mario: God dammit! Where is all of your spaghetti?!
Lasagna?! AUUUUGGHH!
Luigi: Mario!?
Mario!!
WAAAUUUUGH!!
Oh, that's not good.
Peach: Luigi!
OOUUUWWAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUHHH!!!
Luigi: Oh, you stupid bi-
iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii
[explosion sound]
Toad: YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAA [boiing!]
Solo style, bitches!
WAAAAAAAAAAAAOOOOOOOOOO!
Mario: Shut up! I'm-a hungry! SMG4: What are you doing?
[POW!] [CRASH!]
Toad: HELLO! Luigi: Ohhhhhh...
Peach: [giggle]
Toad: Dad, is that you?
I haven't seen you since foreverr!
Luigi: OWOWOW!
Toad: [joyful rambling]
WOAAAAAAAAAAAAAUGH! Luigi: Get off of me.
[Toad is still screaming]
SMG4: Guys, stop touching my stuff, okay.
Now, what is going on?
Mario: I have misplaced my pants.
SMG4: C'mon, man! Put on some clothes!
[rumble]
Bowser: ROOOOOOAAA-
Waluigi: wauh, Wauh, WAUH, WAUH! Wario: waa, Waa, WAAAAH!
Po: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Shy Guy: YEAH, TOAST!
SMG4: Okay, everybody, calm down.
We're going to figure out what the hell is going on here?
'cauz all of you...
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!
Mario: Where's Glitchy?
You kidnapped him, and now you kidnapped us!
Luigi: My mustache is crooked.
Waluigi: Oh, come on!
Waluigi doesn't look too sexy in this world!
Shy Guy: FRENCH TOAST!!!!!!!
Mario: Get the kidnapper!
[rioting noises]
Peach: [giggle]
[punch sound] Mario: HAHAHAHHAAHHAHHHH!
[punch] Mario: WWAAAAAAAAAUUHHH! Luigi: WAAAAUUGHH!
[kick sound] Toad: YOH-HOH!
[kick] Wario: Have a rotten day!
SMG4: WA-TAAAHHH! [headbutt] Wario: AAEHHHGH!!
[punch sound] Waluigi: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
[punch] Bowser: RRRAAWWWWR!
Mario: I'm gonna get you! [kicking sound]
Peach: YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAH [kick]
Po: Let's DO THIS!
[DING!] Po: AH-HAH-HAUGH!!!
Luigi: OOOOOH! Right in the [inaudible]!
[FATALITY]
[dat clap]
Toad: [SCREAMING] SMG4: AAAuughh!
[glass breaking] Mario: Wahooo! Toad: Yay! Party!
[more glass breaking] PINGAS PINGAS PINGAS
[even more glass breaking] Waluigi: WAAAAALUIGI TIME!
[more glass breaking]
Wario: [snoring]
[snoring] SMG4: Ah!
Wario: [snoring]
Luigi: Oh, it's getting so hot in here,
so hot, so take off all your clothes.
[record scratch]
Luigi: [screaming]
Oh... I can explain!
It was in the suggestions!
And now it's- I actually enjoy it! SMG4: [inaudible] [laughter]
Luigi: OH-hoh-hoh-hohhhhhhhhh... :(
SMG4: Oh no...
Toad! What are you doing? Get out of there!
Toad: My people are calling me!
SMG4: Don't make me come in there.
Toad: YEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
[SMAK]
SMG4: ?
Old Man: Got any shampoo, sonny?
Waluigi: PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS
SMG4: Aw, no!
Everyone: [inaudible] Peach: *This girl is on fiiiiiiirrrrrrrrre!
SMG4: Uhh... Whaat?
Po: What's up?
Shy Guy: YEAH! TOAST!
Narrator: Po made a bowl of tubby custard.
Po: Tubby custard! Tubby custard!
Shy Guy: Come on, come on, COME ON! COME ON!
[ding]
YEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!
SMG4: Ughhhhhh! Bowser: BWAH-HAH-HAH-HAH-HAHH!
Bowser: [humming Katy Perry - TiK ToK] SMG4: Awwwww... What are you doing? What are you doing?!
Bowser: Bitch! I'm fabulous!
SMG4: Oh!
[slam]
Kevin: Yo, Luke! What's up!
SMG4: Hey, Kevin.
[awkward laughter]
SMG4: Uhh... the- the princess wants to marry you!
Lakitu: OHHHH MY GOD!
AAAAAAHHHHH! SMG4: Nyah!
[SMASH]
[kick] Ughn!
EVERYBODY GET INTO MY ROOM NOW!!!!!!
[INAUDIBLE] LET'S GO! LET'S GO! Toad: NO! Waluigi: WAAAHHHHH!!
Peach: [screaming] Bowser: Come back! I love you!
SMG4: ACKH!
SHOO!
AUGH!
Po: *Me and my sandwich...
*Sandwich,
*sandwich.
Sandwich make me strong!
SMG4: Eugh this... What is this?
Po: WHO TOUCHED MY TUBBY CUSTARD?!
TUBBY CUSTARD! SMG4: Oh, oh, hey, You want this?
Huh?
COME AND GET ME!
Po: [WAR SCREAM] SMG4: [SCREAMING FOR HIS LIFE] OH GOD!
Mario: *When the moon hits your eye
*like a big pizza pie,
*that's amore
WHAAAA?
SMG4: Surprise!!
[whistling]
Everyone: [inaudible]
[slam]
Hey, Kevin.
Kevin: Hey, what are you doing?
SMG4: Oh, I'm just chillin', mate.
That's what I'm doing.
Uhm...
Waluigi: WHO'S TOUCHING MY BUTT?
Wario: Oops. Sorry.
SMG4: How are you... going? And uh-
[SLAM]
Kevin: Uhh... Toad: HELLO! SMG4: [awkward laughter]
Um... uhh...
SMG4: Do you like my new plushie Toad? Toad: Hey! Put me down!
Toad: [growl] SMG4: It can talk.
Toad: [rambling] Kevin: It's really nice.
Toad: [racist rambling]
SMG4: Okay, that's enough.
Toad: [SCREAMING]
[slam]
Kevin: Alright... I was just here to pick something up.
Bye bye.
SMG4: [sigh]
Mario & Waluigi: [penis jokes] [rave music]
Mario & Waluigi: *I'm so fresh you can suck my nuts.
SMG4: Dammit, guys! You're not supposed to be here!
Stop! Just, please stop screwing around!
SMG4: Okay, you can screw around, just
please do not let anyone see you, okay?
Old Man: YEA-YUH!
Bowser: And a one, and a two
I'm king of the koopa and I'm here to say
I'm a kind, kind king and I'll make your day.
Look out and lend an ear;
I've got a proposal for you, my dear.
If you want to live in *harmony
You're going to have to marry me!
Peach: Ugh! In your dreams
and my nightmares!
Bowser: Oh, hell no!
Peach: [screaming] Bowser: [singing Spice Girls - Wannabe]
Waluigi: Hey, can I have some?
Can I have some? Hey!
Hey! Can I have some?
How about now?
Waluigi: [still asking] Wario: [rambling about money and castles]
Waluigi: WAHH! Ohhhhh......
Bowser: *If you wanna be my lover
Po: Did you know that Bowser is trying to force his way into the prime minister position again?
Toad: No! What will the princess say?
Old Man: Is it just me or is this heat wave the most absolutely ghastly thing you've ever experienced?
Po: Not as ghastly as your face!
[laughter]
Luigi: Heh?
Toad: [SCREAMING] Po: [CRAZY NOISES]
Old Man: I JUST SHIT MY PANTS! Toad: [SCREAMING] Po: [CRAZY NOISES]
SMG4: Okay, Mario, Do you have any idea how you got here?
Mario: I don't know.
I just saw a floating screen of my sexy face.
Aw, yeah, and I wanted to kiss that screen.
SMG4: So, Project 64 must have been open.
Mario: Oh! And I tried to close it and it went cuckoo crazy
and now I'm here.
SMG4: Maybe because of the closing the program...
[slam]
Mario, stand back!
Mario: Wha-?
What is it?
Are we looking at sexy explosive spaghetti pictures?
SMG4: Is it in there?!
Mario: AHH-HAH-HA-!
HAH-HAH-HAAAHHHHHHH!
HORRAAYYY! [SCREAMING IN FEAR]
SUPRISE, MOTHAFUCKA! [HIGH-PITCHED SCREAMING]
Peach: [On PC] ...and it's all thanks to you!
Thank you, Mario.
Mario: *Can't touch this! [SCREAMING IN FEAR]
Mario: Wha-? [FALCON...
...PUNCH!] [STILL SCREAMING]
[SPASTIC SCREAMING]
Mario: [On PC] Yahoo!
Mario: Smoke weed every day! [SCREAMING]
[SCREAMING] OH, SHIT!
[SMASH]
Mario: DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMN!
SMG4: Okay! That's enough!
ZYAAH! Mario: Hooo! OOF!
I'm beat.
SMG4: Really?
Mario: Oh, c'mon, man. The guy said it was fine.
SMG4: We need to get to the Super Mario 64 game that's playing in the Mushroom Kingdom.
Mario: [GRUMBLE]
Ain't nobody got time for that!
HAHAHAHAHAHHHHHHHHHHHH! SMG4: Mario, wait!
Mario: Oh! Hey, look! It's the castle!
and maybe the spaghetti I left there and the princess's underwear and-
SMG4: YAH!
SMG4: Finally! I'll go gather everyone up.
Guys?
Where'd they go?
No, no... Oh, no!
no, nO, No, NO!
Everyone: [INAUDIBLE] [singing Chamillionare - Ridin'] [CRASH]
SMG4: [sigh]
Looks like there's only one thing to do now...
[DERPY MUSIC]
[slowed derpy music]
SMG4: [inaudible] [slowed derpy music]
[flop]
Wario: Have a rotten day!
Toad: WAHAHOO!
Mario: Horraay!
Bowser: HEY!
[STOMP] SMG4: AW GOD!
Okay, you all, everyone,
time to go home,
time to get out of my life.
Thank you, it's been fun- no it hasn't.
Any last words? Huh?
Luigi: OOHH HOO HAH HAH!
[speaking Italian]
SMG4: Okay! Nobody has to say anything! Luigi: Whaaa-?!
SMG4: Okay! Time to go! Let's go! Let's go!
Everybody back in the portal! Let's go! Time to go! Luigi: Yaaa! Toad: Here we go!
SMG4: Everybody has to... Yeah. Waluigi: *Weh heh heh-heh heh!
SMG4: Hey Bowser! Take that!
A bra for you!
SMG4: Mario...
see you later.
[inaudible]
Mario: Okay! Bye byyye!
SMG4: Welp. That's the end of that chapter. Ugh.
I wonder if there's a... [inaudible]
[Windows error noises]
SMG4: I'll bet Mario... [inaudible]
[SMASH]
[car alarms]
Mario: MAMA F***ER [car alarms]
Luigi: Waaah!
Steve: Hi, guys!
SMG4: Unhh...
[derp noises]
[inaudible] [laughter]