S: I scream, you scream
S: We all scream
S: For sprinkles
H: Okay everyone, riddle me this
Why does it seem that ice cream places, at least in Minnesota
Have ceased to carry rainbow sprinkles?
I can't find them anywhere, my friend called a few different places
And asked if they had rainbow sprinkles and every single one
They were like no, we don't have those
Because I was under the impression that that was like
The most basic ice cream topping that anyone could ask for
And yet I can't find it anywhere
S: You know what this sounds like? H: What?
S: A conspiracy H: Yeah, of some sort, I don't know what it is
S: The powers that be are taking the sprinkles away
H: [laughs] S: Whatever will we do
H: Don't get me started
[intro song] Hello, hello, welcome to the show, welcome to the show
Welcome to the show, it's time to talk about our lives [Chloe bark]
H: The ice cream stores might not have sprinkles but you know who does?
H: The grocery stores, they have sprinkles and now I have sprinkles
H: I am going to go to Dairy Queen, who does not have sprinkles
H: And I am going to order my ice cream and sprinkle my own ice cream
S: Let's do it
S: When we lived in our apartment like two years ago
S: We had a DQ that was like 2 miles away and it was a treat
S: We would go there, I don't know, once a week to celebrate
S: Things that were like... H: Once a week?
S: I don't know, once a week, once a month
S: Not always once a week
H: Well I think it was once a week but it wasn't to celebrate
S: It was also like ... it was fun to celebrate things with DQ
S: Now, for the last two years... left up here
S: We haven't had a DQ in our vicinity H: Yeah
S: So we haven't had DQ
H: Although, not to start any issues.. S: What issues?
H: I think Culvers, which we had in Northfield is better than DQ
H: I don't know, in case anyone feels strongly S: Oh, that's an issue
H: I don't want to start a whole thing about it
H: But I do think that Culver's is better than Dairy Queen
S: Anyway H: You're not even gonna voice your opinion?
H: What do you think? S: I don't eat ice cream
H: That's true
S: I'll eat Culvers more because they have soup
H: And you like their cheese fries S: Yeah
S: Anyway now we live about 5 minutes from a DQ
S: So Hannah's life has drastically improved
H: This is my first time going though, I can't believe it
H: Cause when we got the house I kept saying
H: Wow, I can't believe I'm lucky enough to live near DQ
H: And I actually haven't gotten around to going
H: If you noticed, Shane said we live like 5 minutes from here
H: And he's giving me directions cause I don't know at all where I am yet
S: Well you haven't been there yet H: I have been in this shopping area
H: But I don't know how to get here from our house
H: Not good with directions, it's gonna take me a few more months
H: Before I can navigate here on my own S: You'll get the hang of it
H: I'll get there
S: There's a Burger King? H: We knew that
H: Just all the way around, onto the highway?
S: No, before H: That's the highway it looks like to me
S: Right here H: That's not the highway?
H: Ooop
H: Why does this look like it's not a driveway
H: Oh okay, we're here
S: Those people are eating outside H: I know
S; Are you doing drive-thru or are you going in?
H: I was doing the drive-thru
H: I don't actually know we're I'm going I'm just gonna keep driving
S: There's like people here on dates H: Maybe I should go that way
H: Oh, wow, there's a lot of people lined up
H: You don't want a blizzard? S: Nothing
H: You think they have... they have hot fudge right? They haven't taken that away?
H: Yeah, they have hot fudge, I am going to get a sundae
H: I guess a sundae is what it's called
H: I just want a cup of ice cream with hot fudge
S: That's called a sundae H: Apparently it's called a sundae
S: That's not what I think of
H: Shall I just order a cup of ice cream with hot fudge instead?
S: What do you mean? H: Like not call it a sundae
H: Sundae is chocolate, strawberry, hot fudge
H: Hot fudge sundae is what I'm getting
H: You don't want fries or anything? S: Nah, I'm full
H: They have a thin mint blizzard S: Yum
[swamp noises]
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S: Oooh, that might be a mother
S: I see a mother, oh, it's a gator
S: Oh, I hate gators, in the vegetation
H: I don't see it
S: Oh, it's a tree
S: Alright, I'm taking a big risk here, as you see behind me
S: There is nothing but lush luscious vegetation
S: And that can only mean one thing
S: It is riddled with crocs
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H: Uh, by programs do you mean TV shows Shane?
S: My programming H: Okay
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S: Oh mama, something just slithered out of the lake, it's a croc
S: I've been waiting my whole life for this moment, a real croc
S: Hello little fella, you're friendly, you're friendly, you're friendly
S: Here, here, here, you're friendly, alright, don't mean to hurt ya
S: We'll let her be, it's a mother, I can tell it's a mother
H: They have a blue raspberry one S: No thank you
M: Hi, welcome to Dairy Queen, how can I help you?
H: Hi, can I please have a medium hot fudge sundae?
M: Okay, anything else? H: No, that's it
M: that'll be 3.54 H: Thank you
H: I did it S: Good job, get your sprinkles ready
S: Make sure you have them out when they hand it to you
H: I'm gonna eat some of the hot fudge off, then I'm gonna sprinkle
S: Really, why?
H: Yeah, I'm not gonna put it on top of that
H: I like vanilla ice cream with sprinkles and I like vanilla ice cream with hot fudge
H: But I don't like them together S: Oh my god
S: You have to make a masterpiece of everything?
H: No, I'm gonna have them separately
S: You know what, to each their own
H: Yeah, it doesn't really affect you so S: Everyone has their own ice cream opinions
H: Yep S: Oh, pretty drive-thru area
H: All flowery and beautiful
H: They did the flip S: They what?
H: They put the blizzard upside down S: Why?
H: That's a thing, if you don't do it you get the next one for free
S: Are you serious?
H: To show that it's frozen enough to put it upside down that it won't come out
S: Never heard of that H: They're doing it
S: I had no idea, I've lived my whole life... H: Really? That's funny
H: You know so little about ice cream in general
S: That wasn't upside down H: Those were french fries
H: Oh, do you smell that? French fries? S: They smell pretty funny
H: You are a ray of sunshine today
H: It's my turn
H: Oh, I have to pay S: Oh yeah, you do
S: I do smell french fries
H: Hi, good, how are you? Thank you, you too
S: Gonna flip it?
H: No, Shane, because it wasn't a blizzar
H: Shall I pull over or shall we go to a park?
S: Pull over
H: Mmm, wow, look at that, beautiful
S: Time for... H: Time for my ice cream
S: Sprinkles H: Uh uh, not yet
H: Mmm, oh my god, want any? S: No thank you
H: It is time S: Now that it's eaten
H: No, there is still a good amount in there, it's all blown out, okay
H: You can't see that S: This is a big moment
S: Are you doing it with the lid off? H: You have to
S: Isn't there the holes? H: No, just a regular lid
S; Wow, that's bold of you H: There is zero other option
H: So that's not really bold of me
H: I will probably put more sprinkles on in a minute
S: Got your sprinkles on the ice cream H: True ice cream
H: I don't understand why places aren't.. I want a cone dipped in rainbow sprinkles
H: And I can't give that to myself
H: Like unless I bring a giant vat of sprinkles to dip my cone
H: You know? Anyone in Minnesota, I'm sure that there are places...
H: Like when I was growing up in Conneticut
H: Whenever we would go to the beach, I could get you rainbow dipped cones
H: So I don't understand, but if anyone in Minnesota knows of a place
H: That does sprinkles on soft serve, please let me know
S: This is urgent, everyone, please
H: It's not urgent but it is important
S: We are at the end of our options here, we're feeling a bit desperate
S: If you can help us, please do
H: Mmm, cause these are really good but they're not...
H: The store bought sprinkles are not the same
S: How are they different? H: They're harder, they're longer
H: They're just different S: They're longer
H: Yeah, see? S: They look like sprinkles
H: They're long S: Yeah
H: That's not normal S: You can cut them in half, each one
S: How is it? H: It's so good, I love it
H: I'm gonna come here every day
[music]