we are now joined by dr sue varma
board-certified psychiatrist dr varma i
think this was such a shock to a lot of
people because we just saw her she was
just at the country music uh you know
hall of fame i mean at the awards she
walked the red carpet and she had a plan
to go on tour we didn't see this coming
i guess that's the case with a lot of
people with mental illness it can be you
know and one one of the positive signs
we look for is someone who's forward
thinking and future planning and that's
why this really comes as a shock i mean
we do know that she had a long history
of depression but we weren't expecting
that she was really like optimistic and
hopeful but realistic at the same time
dr varma for folks who are watching
listening right now what what are some
of the signs that folks should be
looking out for signs that someone may
be suffering so two hallmark signs low
mood and um a lack of interest and
pleasure and things that they once used
to do plus not socializing poor hygiene
and grooming um and avoidance of social
situations you know you always wonder
like what could i have done i when you
look at wynonna and ashley i'm sure
that's been kicking around in their head
what could i have done and families do
carry guilt absolutely so you know the
first thing i would say is don't blame
yourself like monday morning quarterback
isn't going to help in this situation
what can you do to celebrate the
person's life what can you do to um
counsel uh and grieve with the family
and celebrate but also educate the
public which is something what we're
doing right now you wrote something that
really struck me for people watching and
that is depression is a medical
problem it is not a moral failure
this is not something that people are
doing to themselves
tell us more about that idea yes no a
lot of times family members will say but
you know i came to your house i tried to
get you up you ran away you went into
your bedroom and you may talk talk about
that and you have to recognize this this
is a medical illness in diabetes you
have a problem with your pancreas right
you have problems in the body depression
is a medical illness that affects the
brain nobody's doing this to themselves
people do not choose to be unhappy
in families does it the dynamic change
when it's a matriarch or a patriarch
sort of the leader of that family like
you have with naomi judge because who's
going to tell her anything right because
she has a whole team around her already
you'd think tom such a great question so
many times we don't want to get involved
or we're afraid of interfering or being
too nosy so we don't ask a person about
their treatment the best thing you can
do is to ask are you going to therapy
how is it working out do you like your
therapist if not what can we do can i
help you find a different therapist ask
your therapist what more can i get out
of the treatment change medications
there's so much that family members can
do but how do you even begin to to
approach the subject like if you see
someone who's starting to you can see
what's happening yes they're not as
hygienic they're they're sleeping more
what's the proper way to go to go in and
address this start with open-ended
questions and then like what how are you
doing how are you really really doing i
have time i'm not going anywhere yeah
the phones are hidden i'm making eye
contact with you an arm on the shoulder
and eye contact and said i'm here for
you i've noticed x y and z you're not
the person that you used to be are you
feeling joy two things people who are
suicidal will tell you they feel
helpless and they feel like they're a
burden on their family members if
somebody tells you that they're hopeless
we should point out we don't know
exactly how uh naomi had she but she was
some people millions people suffer in
silence over these things you know you
don't know they don't talk about it she
was so open you just wrote a book on it
yeah she had so many adversities in life
childhood trauma
she i read had a thing called treatment
resistant depression what is that yes so
treatment-resistant depression refers to
a subgroup of people who have had two or
more medical treatments that have failed
and we know that one-third of
patients will fall into this category
who have received a variety and one
third will be super super resistant so
that's why it's important to recognize
that you might need a second opinion you
might need to have a change in
modalities of treatment there's so many
available right now and psychotherapy
talk therapy particularly cognitive
behavioral therapy where you change the
way that you think and perceive the
world and interact with people to in
order to change your outlook and to
change your functioning but what you
just said about starting that
conversation that was that was fantastic
and don't give up so dr vaughn
thank you so so much we appreciate it of
course we also want to take a second to
remind everybody that if you or someone
you know is struggling you can always
call the national suicide prevention
lifeline that number is on your screen
right now it's
1-800-273-talk and of course you can
text home to
741-741
yeah thanks again
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