I sit here before you today a truly broken and defeated man
What is going on? Did you see how happy I was? I was ready to be like "Hi, everyone"
I have been knocked down, kicked, rolled over by an 18 wheeler
And that 18 wheeler is Hannah
Excuse me?
For the longest time, years upon years
I know where this is going, I just realized what you're doing
I have always enjoyed my position as top dog on Instagram
Uh huh, uh huh
I've had my account for much longer than Hannah
True, a decade, probably
I have been creating and curating
Outstanding, fantastic, compelling, engaging content for so long
And as such, I've always had anywhere from a hundred to two hundred thousand
More followers than Hannah
What? No, it's always been twenty thousand more
S: In recent years, around twenty thousand H: Okay (laughs)
Let's check how many followers we have today
S: I have... H: You are screaming in my ear
S: I'm passionate H: Bring it down
I have about 511,000 followers
H: Good job S: Thank you
I just passed the half a million mark
That's really cool
Hannah?
H: Did you want me to go next? S: Go ahead
Um, I think I'm at about 1 million 40,000 now
I sit here before you today, a broken man
Oh, Shane, it's because we had a reel
I guess I had a reel on my page, it has 100 million views
It has like 2 million likes, it just went viral, and that's why
And obviously I'm not actually upset
No, Shane's really actually quite excited by it
Probably more than I am, he brings it up a lot
(Shane laughs) That's been big change number one
True
S: Hannah is like, famous now H: Oh my god
But the actual change, if you will, is that we are making more short content
On Instagram
Yeah
We're posting it on her account and on my account, whatever page makes more sense
H: Uh huh S: And we're having a lot of fun
It's not all replacing Youtube, but it's more...
They're shorter, more jokey videos, they're just quicker, you know?
And it's like a thing now, and we kind of resisted Tiktok for a long time
I still don't go on Tiktok, the comments seem meaner than anywhere else
But we resisted that form of content for a long time, but it's actually pretty fun
S: Yeah H: So we've been doing some more
And we put them on Youtube as shorts, some of them
But if you want to check that out, follow us on Instagram
The point of this was not to tell you to follow us
But just that we're making different content over there
And Hannah's shot miles beyond me in terms of Instagram popularity
But then I'll be like, hey Shane, want to make a reel for your page?
H: And he'll be like nah S: (laughs)
So I'll be like okay, not my problem then
(Intro song) Hello, hello, welcome to the show, welcome to the show
Welcome to the show, it's time to talk about our lives (Chloe bark)
Thank you to Harry's for sponsoring this video
Here's something that many of you probably don't know about Hannah
Something that haunts me every day of my life
And that is that the bottom of her feet, the soles of her feet
Grow hair like a carpet
This is slander, this is libel, this is false information
But thanks to Harry's and their incredible razors
I am able to shave the bottoms of her feet every night before bed
So that I don't have to feel those prickles all night long
That's not true
Hannah and I have been using Harry's for real for a few months now
And we absolutely love it
I have been loving Harry's for other parts of my body
Legs, armpits, whatever, not the bottoms of my feet, we both love Harry's
I found that it gives me a really smooth shave that lasts for a long time
And I have really sensitive skin and it doesn't irritate it which I love
And they deliver the supplies right to your door every month
Making it super easy and affordable to get a great shave
Refill blades start as low as 2 bucks
And new Harry's customers get their starter set
Which includes a 5 blade razor, weighted handle
Foaming gel with aloe, and a travel cover
It's a $13 value all for three dollars
There's never been a better time to try Harry's, so go to Harrys.com/squirmy
To get their starter set for just three bucks
It's 100% satisfaction guaranteed so you have nothing to lose
Just go to Harrys.com/squirmy right now to get this special offer
That's Harrys.com/squirmy
Alright, unfortunately, it's time to shave her feet again
S: It's been about six hours, so... H: (laughs)
Here we go
Change number two is very exciting
Yeah, it is really exciting, that was really the change that we came here
To tell you about, I didn't know about that change that Shane started with
Oh, number one you mean was not..? Yeah, yeah
Yeah, number one wasn't like a thing that we had discussed
As she was setting the camera up I said, I know how I'm going to open this video
I said okay, I thought it would be something brief, it went on and on
S: Brief is not in my wheelhouse H: That's true
Which is why I don't make reels as much as you do
Number two change is that we have recently signed with a talent agency
Yes, we again resisted this for almost four years now we've had our Youtube channel
We've been represented by ICM for our literary stuff for a while
S: So that's still the same H: Yeah
But we've never had an agent specifically for all of this online stuff that we're doing
Yep
S: And recently we connected with A3.. H: Artist's Agency
And really clicked with them very well and we're really excited to be signed with them now
And represented by A3, I'm imagining like cheering noises here
H: Yay (cheering sounds)
S: What that means for you H: Nothing at all
Well, I think it does mean that there are some exciting new and different opportunities
S: On the horizon H: Yeah
That A3 is actively helping us pursue, so yeah, fun stuff on the way
Bigger and bigger and more amazing surprises
H: Yeah, we're excited S: Yeah
Alright, so the third update on our lives is less exciting
Maybe that's offensive to you, but it's about Shane's wheelchair
He has been using it a lot more
S: My new wheelchair H: Yes, his new one (laughs)
Not just any wheelchair
Yeah, Shane has recently become a wheelchair user
No, it's his new wheelchair, and he's been using it a lot more
He got it in December if you don't already know, it's been a long road
It's ironic because I'm not in it right now
No, well there's still some kinks to iron out
But people ask all the time, so he has been using it a lot more
It's in some of the reels we've made
But yeah, it's not a full time transition yet
S: It is so fast H: It is really fast
And it can go so high, and it has a spot for me to ride
I'm obsessed with it and I can't wait for you to be ready to use it all the time
That is, we are now home in Minneapolis for about a month and a half
Until our next big engagement, and during that time
I really really intend to make my new chair my primary chair
Yeah, the goal is to take it on our trip in June
Which seems unattainable right now but maybe it'll happen
I don't think it will but I'm telling myself I will try
It's the goal
I will give it my all, but I am excited about that
And that is a big life change even though it's not as exciting for you
It's not the most glamorous, but yeah, it'll be really cool
What else? What other updates do we have?
H: (Hannah sighs) Oh boy
Hannah has gotten a lot taller in the couple days since we last saw you
That's not true, I'm trying to think
We've been doing some speaking engagements on Zoom
I'm almost 30
Yeah, Shane's birthday is in a month
Wait, what day is it?
My birthday?
No, I mean today, is it April 27th?
I don't know, 28th I think
Then it's exactly a month away, his birthday's May 28th
We're getting really close to his 30th birthday
And last year I did this big surprise, his parents came out to surprise him
Andrew and Laura came out to surprise him, it was this whole thing
And now for the big 3-0..
It's gonna be even bigger than that, right?
No, it's kind of like well, Shane, we did it big last year
We have no giant plans yet but we'll figure something out
I'm normally not a birthday person, I could care less
Something about 30 has me feeling like it's special
It is special! Are you excited?
A little bit
Are you happy to be 30, like you're excited?
S: Yeah H: That's cool, yay
So I will post my birthday wishlist below
S: Just kidding, no I'm excited for that H: Yeah
One little life update is that my mom and dad and brother and his wife
Are all coming to visit this summer, that's always kind of up in the air
Unsure, but we're booking it so we'll be spending time here hanging out
Hopefully it'll be warm by then
Yeah, it's in the summer, it better be
But yeah, guess there's no guarantee
That's another update, it's still cold here in Minnesota
That's not an update, just a way of life
It's not an update, but it's just letting you know that it's still cold
Still in the forties, not nice
Oh, okay, I thought of a big one
We're doing my fertility testing next week
Next week, yeah, like this upcoming week
Yeah, we should've led with that
That is a big one, well maybe I'll... no, I'm not gonna try to edit this around
This will come at the end, we're gonna do that
We'll have to put in the title like, stay to the end for the biggest one of all
That's exciting and nerve wracking, for me at least
But we'll make a dedicated video about that
S: Yeah, yeah H: But that's gonna be exciting
That's the last big update, but let's stop now before we think of more
Then they're gonna get smaller and smaller, like I bought this ice cream, it's gonna get like..
Oh yeah, life update, last night for dinner... (Both laugh)
No, that's what's going on, and we love you, and...
S: We love you? H: Wow
I'm in love with you
I was just like, okay that's nice, you don't usually say that, but..
S: I don't know why I ended that way H: You do
S: We are in love with you H: It's so true
Have a good day, thank you for watching, bye
Bye
Follow me on Instagram, follow me, not Hannah