- This (bleep) nasty.
Oof! (coughing)
(gavel banging)
(hiphop music)
I'm here to help you
with all your (bleep) boy needs.
Let's get right into it.
The people verse she forgot.
My girl left her pair of shoes
in my man's whip.
She keeps hittin' me up
for his number to get them back.
I'm just saying
if she knew that that's the homey,
why don't she ask me to get them for her?
Seems like she's lookin' for more than her shoes.
I don't know,
maybe I'm lookin' into it too much.
You're kinda lookin' into it too much, sir.
But if she keeps asking for the number,
and that's yo homeboy
why the hell yo lazy ass
ain't went to go get the shoes yet?
Why yo girlfriend ain't got her damn shoes back?
Yo homeboy could've been dropped them off to you.
You could've met up with him.
Next time she asks for his number,
"Hey bae, hey bae,
I need yo friend number
cause I left my shoes in his car."
You need to be like "(bleep) ha!
Jokes on you, I got the shoes.
Come over to the house,
I got em. I got em.
Flip it on her.
You surprise her
and go get the damn shoes.
Quit tryna beat around the bush
and not give her the mans number.
Why you ain't got your girls shoes back?
Yeah, she's guilty,
but you are too for not handlin' that.
Both of y'all guilty.
Case closed.
Go get them damn shoes.
(laughing)
You know what,
I need to fix my lip gloss.
Y'all stressin' me out.
Phew!
The people verses no reply.
When we're out together
my man is on his phone nonstop.
I swear he's constantly typing and laughing
even when were "Netflix and chill" mode.
But yet when we're apart
he'll go hours without replying to my texts.
He says he's busy working,
but I think he might just be a f*boi.
Now hold your horses.
(Bleep) don't lose your man because of me.
Let me just tell you my experience.
I see both sides.
I work a lot,
so I'm always on my phone,
always texting when I'm out with my friends,
even when I'm out with the boo.
But me being always on my phone,
I always answer it when I'm not with my friends.
So if he's not answering the phone
when he's not with you
and he's giggling while he's typing,
(sarcastic laugh)
Baby girl maybe another (bleep) is making him giggle.
Are you funny?
Maybe you just need to take some comedy classes.
Cause he all up in his phone laughing
and you need to make him laugh in person.
Don't be boring.
(Bleep) practice your standup.
Learn some jokes.
Try some uh,
go to Wild' n Out.
Look go to Wild' n Out
and get some (bleep) from DC Young Fly or something.
Make yo man laugh.
Obviously he likes to giggle, okay?
Um, if he guilty?
I'm not gonna say he's a f*boi,
but you're probably guilty for being boring.
(chuckles)
Hm! This looks like it's gonna be a good read.
Okay, the people verses bag boy.
The summer before senior year of high school
I was working at a grocery store
in my hometown and I got really friendly
with this guy who told me
he was a freshman in college.
He was flirting with me all summer
and we did make out a couple times,
but nothing else happened.
I found out that he quit
and he told everyone we had sex even though we didn't.
Oof.
I feel like that makes him a f*boi.
But I'm not sure,
I haven't really hooked up with too many guys.
Poor baby, he is definitely a f*boi.
Guilty, guilty, guilty, guilty.
(banging gavel)
Guilty!
Don't you be doin' that to these young girls.
You didn't hit it.
With yo lame self.
Gotta go around lyin' on your little pee pee.
It's probably the size of my damn pinky toe!
Lyin' on that little girl.
She says she ain't been
with that damn many people.
Don't be puttin' her name
in the streets like that.
You kissed her two times
and now you're tellin' people you had sex.
Liar, liar pants on fire.
Leave that little girl alone.
Oo, makin' me mad.
I hate when guys lie on me.
Sometimes it's not a lie, though.
Mmm!
Uh, but don't lie on that damn little girl.
Aight?
You are guilty.
Case closed.
Poor baby.
It's okay, girl.