(upbeat music)
(grunting)
- It's July of 1897--
- Miss Foxtrot, no.
We can't go on another educational adventure right now.
River needs our help.
Look, I know it's risky, but if we try hard,
we can get her back safely.
- Yeah, we just need to believe in ourselves or something.
- And I think you're just trying to protect yourself.
- No, no-no-no-no, listen.
This is Salomon August Andree of Sweden.
Resourceful, eternally optimistic,
and a total failure.
(laughing)
- Hi there, I'm gonna fly a hot air balloon
from Svalbard over the north pole to Canada,
or maybe Russia, both work.
- He's not sure?
- Well, you can't steer balloons.
- I can.
My balloon will drag dozens of long ropes
along the ground, slowing it enough
that we can use sails to change course.
All aboard!
Come on, gang, hop in the balloon.
(laughing)
Hands and feet inside the basket.
Just kidding, you can put your feet up.
(sighing)
- Oh.
- Up up and away!
(magical instrumental music)
(yelling)
- Shit-shit-shit-shit-shit.
(dramatic music)
That's fine.
(laughing)
It is fine now.
- It wasn't.
Andres immediately lost his only method of steering,
and he unloaded so much weight
that the balloon shot up to an altitude of 700 meters.
At that height, hydrogen escaped even more quickly,
and ice crusted onto his balloon.
(yelling)
- Shit-shit-shit-shit-shit.
(yelling)
- Oh, I'm getting sick.
- Get used to it.
With no equilibrium, Andree rose
and fell for two days straight.
- Everything's going great.
- We're all gonna die!
- Okay, compromise.
Let's say we've had some ups and downs.
- Boo!
(yelling)
- Andree was forced to hike back to civilization.
First he went southeast.
- Eastward ho!
- But he was on an ice flow drifting the opposite direction.
He actually traveled backward.
He then converted his balloon into a raft
and set sail to the southwest instead.
- Westward ho!
- But the wind changed directions almost immediately.
- Hmm.
- By September 12th, two months
after his initial departure,
Andre decided to camp through the winter on an ice flow
and let the drift carry him wherever it would.
- Wherever
ho!
- Less than a month later, the ice broke apart
under his encampment, forcing him to relocate
to solid ground, even still, Andree
remained relentlessly upbeat.
Here's what he wrote about himself
and his two companion.
- [Andree] Morale remains good.
With such comrades, one should be able
to manage under, I may say, any circumstances.
- See!
He and his friends looked out for each other.
- They were dead within days!
- Oh that sucks. - Dammit!
- Ah, come on!
- See?
If you try hard, believe in yourself, and stay positive,
you can still fail and die.
- But he was also hasty, stupid, and unprepared.
We can't knowingly abandon River.
- Yeah! - Right!
- Yes we can, I'll show you.
(grunting)
(shivering)
- If you liked that episode of WTF 101,
I have good news, there's way more of it on DropOut.
DropOut is the new premium, ad-free
and uncensored comedy platform from College Humor.
(growling)
(gasping)
(whispering)
Go to dropout.tv and start your free trial today.
Don't worry about me, I'm fine.
Nah, this is all gonna turn out fine.
I feel safe.
- Ho ho!
How's everyone enjoying the wondrous land of Calindonya?