LADIES AND GENTLEMEN -- CHANCE THE RAPPER!
♪♪♪ [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> THANK YOU. THANK YOU.
THANK YOU VERY MUCH. I'M SO HAPPY TO BE HERE HOSTING
"SNL." I'VE BEEN HERE BEFORE AS A
MUSICAL GUEST, BUT THIS IS THE FIRST TIME I'VE HAD TO LIKE TALK
AND STUFF. SO, WE'LL SEE HOW IT GOES.
I DON'T HAVE ANYTHING TO PROMOTE TONIGHT.
THE ONLY THING I'M HERE TO CELEBRATE IS THANKSGIVING.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] AND IN THAT SPIRIT, IN THAT
SPIRIT OF GIVING, I PLEDGE TO GIVE $1 MILLION TO CHICAGO'S
PUBLIC SCHOOLS. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
THANK YOU. THANK YOU.
THE ONLY PROBLEM IS, I TALKED TO MY ACCOUNTANT, AND I DO NOT HAVE
IT. SO I NEED TO MAKE SOME MONEY
VERY FAST. BUT THEN I REALIZED THERE IS NO
GOOD THANKSGIVING SONGS AND YOU CAN MAKE SOME SERIOUS CASH OFF A
HOLIDAY HIT. MARIAH CAREY IS AT THAT TREE
LIGHTING EVERY YEAR SINGING "ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS YOU"
IT'S NOT BECAUSE SHE LOVES GIANTS TREES.
IT'S BECAUSE SHE LOVES HAVING A THIRD ASSISTANT WHOSE ONLY JOB
IS TO YELL AT HER SECOND ASSISTANT.
TONIGHT I WANT TO BECOME THE MARIAH CAREY OF THANKSGIVING.
AND I WANT MY SONG -- I WANT MY SONG TO HONOR WHAT IS TRULY
SPECIAL ABOUT THIS HOLIDAY, HOW IT'S THE ONE TIME A YEAR YOU
INVITE ALL OF YOUR RELATIVES TO DINNER, EVEN THE ONES YOU CAN'T
STAND. SO TO ALL YOU WEIRDOS AND
OUTCASTS IN THE FAMILY, THIS ONE'S FOR YOU.
♪ IT'S THANKSGIVING TIME THE ONE DAY A YEAR
WHEN YOU INVITE THE FOLKS THAT YOU NORMALLY FEAR ♪
♪ IT'S THANKSGIVING TIME WHEN YOU'RE FORCED TO SEE
EVERY SINGLE BAD APPLE ON YOUR WHOLE FAMILY TREE ♪
♪♪♪ ♪ YEAH YOU ARE TECHNICALLY
RELATED BUT THEY DON'T SHARE YOUR DREAMS ♪
♪ THEY ARE YOUR COUSIN IN LAWS WHATEVER THAT MEANS ♪
♪ OH THEY WON'T BE AT YOUR WEDDING YOU DON'T KNOW THEIR
FULL NAME ♪ ♪ ONE IS A FAILED MAGICIAN
AND THE OTHER'S JUST INSANE BUT AT THANKSGIVING TIME NO
ONE SAID IT WOULD BE FUN ♪ ♪ LIKE WHEN YOU ARE YOU'RE
AUNT SHAVONNE SHOWED YOU A GUN YOU ARE NIECE IS GOING TO
CRY ABOUT NO ONE IS WOKED ♪ ♪ AND THAT'S THE EXACT TIME
YOUR UNCLE DECIDES TO TELL A COSBY JOKE ♪
♪ IT IS THANKSGIVING TIME SO SAY GOOD-BYE TO THE RULES
YOUR UNCLE BROUGHT HIS OXYGEN HE'S CHAIN SMOKING KOOLS ♪
♪ IT'S THANKSGIVING TIME THEY'RE A TOTAL TRAIN WRECK
BUT ON THIS ONE DAY THEY GONE GET OUR RESPECT ♪
♪ AND OF COURSE WE CAN'T FORGET THE TRUE HEROES OF
THANKSGIVING THE TURKEYS ♪ >> CAN I GET AN AMEN?
>> AMEN. >> I SAID CAN I GET AN AMEN?
>> AMEN. >> I SAID CAN I GET A DRUM
STICK?
>> HELL NO. >> I TRIED.
♪ IT'S THANKSGIVING TIME AND WE'RE ALL ON ONE SIDE
EXCEPT FOR THE TURKEYS WHO ARE ALL GONNA DIE ♪
♪ IT'S THANKSGIVING TIME SO GET OUT THE CARVING KNIFE
YOUR UNCLE SHOWED UP WITH A WOMAN WHO'S NOT HIS WIFE ♪
♪ AND I APOLOGIZE FOR CAUSING A FUSS BECAUSE NOW
ALL YOUR RELATIVES ARE LIKE IS HE TALKING ABOUT US ♪
♪ AND YOU CAN TELL THEM YOU CAN TELL THEM
IT'S THANKSGIVING TIME ♪ >> COME ON, CLAP.
♪ ONE DAY A YEAR ♪ YEAH.
♪ SO JUST DRINK THE RED WINE ♪
AND THECHB -- AND THEN EIGHT TO TEN BEERS.
♪ EVERY CRAZY AUNT YOU SEE IT'S STUFFIN AND COUSINS AND
LOVIN' AND OVENS AND BELTS NOT ADJUSTING ♪
♪ IT'S THANKSGIVING TIME ♪ ♪♪♪
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] WE'VE GOT A GREAT SHOW FOR YOU
TONIGHT. EMINEM IS HERE.
SO STICK AROUND, WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.
♪♪♪