This story is called.
"Wife of 20 years was cheating for 6 years, my 2 kids may NOT be mine".
This is heartbreaking, I recently found out, that my wife of 20 years was cheating for 6 years, and my 2 great kids, 2 boys, in their early teens, may not be mine.
I am 48, and my wife is 49, we met in high school, basically, we are high school sweethearts, we married shortly after high school.
We have always had a great relationship, we have never really had any big arguments or anything like that, we were always best friends, and we enjoyed doing things together, whether it was going out for dinner, going to the movies, amusement parks, or just watching TV.
There was never a dead bedroom, and we always enjoyed each other's company.
When the kids were at a friends house, or at a stay over, we would have, date nights, we would go out to dinner, then, we would come home, and have some adult time.
I am a hard worker, and I have always provided for my family, I own my own business, and I work long hours, but, I always made time for my wife, and my kids.
My wife used to work, but she quit her job, about 6 years ago, because she wanted to stay home with the kids, and that was fine with me, I wanted her to be able to do that, and I was able to do that financially.
I always tried to do things around the house, to help her out, I would even try my hand at cooking dinner sometimes, just to give her a break.
I never tried to control my wife's movements, if she wanted to go somewhere, I didn't question who she was going with, because I trusted her 100%, she never gave me a reason NOT to trust her, she was always where she said she was going to be.
Whether it be with the kids, or her friends.
I guess I was just a naive husband, who trusted his wife implicitly, and I never thought that she would cheat on me.
I never even considered the possibility.
But, it turns out, that is exactly what she did.
About 2 months ago, I was going through some old pictures, and I came across a picture of my wife, with another man.
They were in a restaurant, and from the looks of it, they were just chatting, they had smiles on their faces and having a good time.
I asked her about it, and she told me, he was just a friend from the job she used to work, and that they had gone out for lunch a few times.
I believed her, because I had no reason NOT to believe her.
Then, about a week ago, I was looking at an old phone of hers, I know I shouldn't have done that, and I saw text messages between her, and this other man.
They were talking about how much they missed each other, and how they couldn't wait to see each other, I WAS BLOWN AWAY, I did NOT even see this coming, I was in shock, I couldn't believe it.
So, after seeing that, I had a million thoughts going through my head, I was trying to figure out what I should do.
Something told me to confront her about it, but, something told me NOT to, I wanted to keep digging, to find out more information, before I said anything.
So, I started snooping around, her email, her social media accounts, I could NOT find anything else, which was surprising.
Later that day, I called my brother, he is a doctor, I asked him could I come by his office, he said sure, my brother and I are close, he went
off to college, while I became an entrepreneur, I am a partner of 2 storage facilities, and I am a landlord for a commercial building.
When I go to see my brother, I had a copy of this photo of my wife and this other man, and I asked my brother, has he ever seen my wife with this guy, he said no, I have never seen them together.
My brother asks me, what's wrong?
I told him about the text messages, and that I had found this photo, I asked him what he thought I should do.
He said, you need to confront her about it, and see what she has to say.
I then indicated to my brother, that I don't want to do that just yet, I want to find more evidence if I can, he then says, what about her social media?
I told him, I didn't find anything suspicious.
He then told me, to check her email, I said, I already did that, and I didn't find anything.
He said, check it again, look for any messages that have been deleted.
He told me, some people don't check the DELETED folder, when they delete email messages.
I went home, and logged into her email account, I had her password, and sure enough, there were a bunch of deleted messages, between her and this other guy.
I just stared at the screen, in disbelief, I mean, there were A LOT of messages, so, I decided to print them out, and hide them.
I then waited for my wife to come home, this day, she was out with her girlfriend, supposedly they went to get their nails done, and then went shopping.
When she came home, I was in the kitchen, I had made dinner, and I had the printouts of the messages hidden.
I asked her how her day was, she said it was good, after dinner, we went into the living room, to watch TV.
I went on like everything was normal, like I didn't know anything.
We watched a movie, and went to bed.
The next morning, I called my brother and told him, I found messages between her and this guy.
I told my brother, I want to make sure the kids are mine, before I say anything.
So, after talking to my brother, my kids were in school, I took them out of school that day, and took them to my brother's office, so he could do a paternity test on them, he said it would take a few weeks to get the results back.
I took the kids out to eat afterwards, and all I could think about was the paternity test, and what the results would say.
A few weeks later, I got a call from my brother, he said he had the results of the paternity test.
I asked him, what do they say?
He told me that the kids ARE mine.
I was so relieved, now, I wanted to put another plan in action, I wanted to hire a private investigator to follow my wife, and see what she is up to, if she is really hanging out with her friend most days.
Since the kids are in school, she has A LOT of free time on her hands.
A few days later, I met up with the private investigator, and gave him a photo of my wife, her friend, and the guy I suspect she is cheating with.
I told him, I wanted him to follow them, and see what they are up to, or if she is indeed, hanging out with her friend.
The private investigator said, he would call me when he had something.
About a week goes by, and I haven't heard anything from the private investigator, so, I call him, and he said, he didn't have anything yet.
As all of this is unfolding, I am keeping the same demeanor with my wife, even being intimate with her, which I know is bad, I don't want her to know anything.
A few more days go by, and I get a call from the private investigator, he said, he had something for me.
He told me, he followed my wife, and her friend to this guy's house.
I thought to myself, what the hell is going on?
I asked him, what did they do?
He said, they went inside for a few hours, and then came back out.
I am scratching my head at this point, so, the private investigator tells me he will keep me posted, and he also said, he can see if he can get a little closer to them.
A week passes, and the private investigator continues his surveillance.
But, this time, when he contacts me, he tells me, he was able to get closer to them, he followed my wife and her friend to this guy's house.
When they went in, the private investigator waited for 30 minutes before exiting his vehicle, then, he made his way to the back of this guy's house, all
the windows were shut, and blinds closed, except one, he could see my wife, her friend, and the guy I suspected she might be cheating with, ALL NAKED.
The private investigator took photos of them through the window, he said, it was pretty clear they were having SEX
I told the private investigator to gather EVERY THING he had on my wife, and get it to me as soon as possible, I wanted to confront her with the evidence, and see what she had to say for herself, but, I wasn't ready yet.
I could NOT let my emotions ruin it.
A few days later, I receive an envelope from the private investigator, it contains photos of my wife, and her friend naked with this guy, as well as text messages between them.
Now, I had to call a few divorce lawyers to see what divorce would look like for me, I had to protect myself, and my kids.
I also wanted to make sure, when I divorced my wife, that I would NOT have to pay her any money, she has been cheating on me for years, and I did NOT want to pay her anything, if I could help it.
Once I found a good divorce lawyer, I had one more step.
Once I had everything in place, I was ready to confront my wife, I had all the evidence, photos, text messages, and even video footage of the 3 of them naked together.
I waited for her to come home from hanging out with her friend, at this point, I didn't care, she came home, I had prepared a wonderful dinner, the kids were upstairs, I fed them earlier.
I sat her down, and said, I have a surprise for you, it was the envelope I prepared with all the evidence of her cheating, and it said, "To My Wonderful and Faithful Wife", she has this big smile on her face, but, little did she know, her life was about to change.
When she pulled out the photos and screenshots of her text messages, photos, her body language TOTALLY changed, she looks up at me, with a look of shock, and disbelief.
I told her, you better get a good divorce lawyer, because, you are NOT going to get ANY of my money.
After that brief conversation, she got up, called her friend, and left the house.
After she left, she sent me a barrage of text messages, apologizing, you know the drill.
My wife stayed gone for a week, my kids started asking where their mother was, I told them, mother went to visit some friends, she will be back in a few days.
I was obviously lying.
As the weeks go by, my wife comes to the house every so often to see the kids, I have had to hire a babysitter for a few hours, until I got home from work.
Fast forward 1 week, my attorney tells me that he has filed for divorce, and we are just waiting for the court date.
A few days later, my wife was served with divorce papers, and she is asking for joint custody of the kids, and she also wants half of my income.
I told my attorney, there is NO WAY I am giving her half of my income, and I will NOT allow her to have joint custody of our kids, she has
been cheating on me for years, my attorney said, here in California, unfortunately, infidelity plays a SMALL role in divorce court.
At the divorce hearing, the judge pretty much demolished me, she gets spousal support for 5 years, but, not a lot, I can deal with it, and joint custody of the kids.
She has them one week, and then, I get the kids for one week.
I was hoping for full custody, but, I will take what I can get.
The worst part is, my kids are going to grow up thinking their father was a cheater, and their mother was the victim.
That is the hardest part for me to deal with.
The judge did NOT award her the house, I got to keep that, only because, my dad owned it, and deeded it over to me, BEFORE we were married many years ago!
A few weeks after the hearing, I was at work, and I got a call from my son's school, he was crying, and said that his mom was taking him and his brother away, and he would never see me again.
I rushed to the school, as fast as I could, and actually ran into my ex-wife, I told her, if she takes the kids out of state, I will have her
arrested, and she said, "try it", I called the police, and they told her, with a custody agreement in place, she COULD NOT take the kids out of state.
Since then, every thing has calmed down a little, we have a somewhat civil relationship, for the sake of our kids.
Even after I went through all the trouble of hiring a private investigator, I still had to pay, and I lost my kids to joint custody.
Don't get married in California, PLEASE, just don't.
As for the ex-wife, the guy she was cheating with, he dumped her, apparently, he was using a rental house to cheat, his wife found out, and she is divorcing him.
Thanks to everyone in the forum, especially the guys and gals that told me, to make sure I think this through, I was highly emotional, when I found all those messages, and the photo.
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