Woah
GAH
WO
HOHOHOHO
HOHOHO
I almost run into your BUTT
but AMERICA DON'T PLAY LIKE THAT BABY
Hello everybody
My name is Markiplier and
welcome back to Slither.io
I'VE BEEN TRYING
FOR A WHILE NOW
TO GIT GUD
and uh..
unfortunately
my skills of
"gitting" and "good"
are uh
nonexistent pretty much
...for the most part
BUT
Now that I've started recording
I have a FUNNY FEELING
I'm gonna do much better
than I hath been doing.
And how I hath been doing
has been...
Well, we're not gonna talk about how I hath been doing
Because I hath
Been doing terribly.
But from now on...
I...
...shall do much WOOF
FAAAA
HA
HAHA
HAAAhaahaaahk...
Aaaah, goddammit
I'm just a sack of crap,
I know I am...
I KNOW I AM
Muhuhuhuhuhuuu....
Now we can finally see the stars and stripe
in their full glory,
as they were always meant to be.
So.
Anyway,
Um,
As far as getting good at slither.io,
the answer is no, I have not,
100% no, ummm
But changes have been made to the game
To make it a little more fair overall
from everything else that has been done before.
There's been many, many, many changes
Well, not that many...
Alright, we're getting somewhere
Not ... not a lot of places,
but America don't play...
America don't play...
America believes in freedom!
And America shall deliver!
HREH!
Gimme yer freedom.
Gimme all yer freedom.
Aaah!
AAAAH GET OFF ME
Whoa, shit.
Oh, god.
Oh gersh.
Oh Gershwin.
Ohh, George Gershwin.
Oh, STARS AND STRIPES FOREVER
RAWR
AAAHA
OH
HOW DID THAT GET HIM?!
OR NOT ME!
WHAT THE FUCK?!
That should have been him!
You guys SAW THAT!
*That sound when you THINK about the Illuminati, but find out that the air horns get to you first*
I got ROBBED!
Now that America's getting back to a respectable length,
As America should...
Hopefully we'll be able to
establish our dominance here,
just like EVERYWHERE ELSE
And everything that we have
Established dominance in
You know, Childhood obesity,
Childhood diabetes,
Childhood s- never mind.
We're number one in all of those categories!
And no one will ever stop us ever
never forever
Cause WEE
Are America.
hehehe
AAH! AHAHAHA!
America's not afraid to run away from a fight!
It takes a lot of bravery to be that brave.
Right now, America's just scoopin' up the scraps
from everybody else's battles
BUT SOON
America will stand
on America's own!
And of course America refers to America
in the America person.
Not the third person,
we're not some third world country...
We're the WORLD'S...
I was about to say 'worst.'
But that's not what America is!
MUH
'MURICA
Everybody watch out,
'Merica comin' through.
Don't worry about yourself,
worry about America.
WHOO
OOH
WHOO
That guy could've got me.
If he'd have been a little more conscious
about where he was joltin'...
... Jeezums.
Ah!
Oh, god.
Whoop
Haha...
Got ya
And what America kills,
America keeps!
Even though I was just about
to run away screamin',
It don't matter to you.
Just let me be me!
And everything'll be fine,
I'm number two on the leaderboard
MARKIFART
AND 'MERICA
RUUUUULLLLLLE ALL!!!!!!!!!!!
Ehhh
I just gotta
hold on to it desperately.
And never let go
Just like everything else.
Shit. Shit.
Everyone wants a piece of America.
Bleah!
The population is getting
a little dense over there.
I don't know why,
but everyone is congregating
in one spot.
And no one seems to be dying.
I don't know why.
Oh boy.
I got a bad feeling about this.
Oh.
Hello!
It's me, apparently,
I don't know why,
but it's me...
Euheheheh
Everyone's just coiling in
a bunch of circles.
No one seems to be exploring anywhere.
Are these actual...
players, or are they just, like,
computers that are programmed to
go in, like, circles?
That's bizarre...
Whoa, woof-
AOOAOOAOOH
OOHAOOH
Almost got killed on me!
Oh my God...
That would have been embarrassing.
Damn it.
I'm stuck on number two...
Uhhh
and it seems...
it seems like there might be
some
weird behavior going-
whoa.
Hey, zap,
how you doing?
Oh, man.
Oh...
Uh-oh...
Ooh.
There we go.
That's delicious.
That's the stuff that I
was looking for.
Whoa, hey.
What're you doing there?
I'm just gonna carry on...
goodbye, everybody...
see ya...
I'm outta here...
Ah, fuck.
I'm...
Agh, I'm just slightly
behind number 1.
All America wants to be
is number one!
Is that so much to ask for?
Probably.
Probably a lot.
Man, everybody's, like,
in perpetual s-
WHOA NO NO
LAGGY NAGGY
HOOHOO
WOO
AAAAH
HOOHOOHO
WEEEEHEHEE
Whoa
Ah, no good.
No bueno.
Oh, FUCK THE LAG
Ehh
Ehh, I'm so scared
I'm so scared
I'm so scared for lag
Oh God lag
Euheheheheheheheh
Heuheheh
Oh, jeez,
the lag is gonna get me.
But I'm so close!
I'M SO CLOSE!
TO VICTORY!
YES!
YEAH!
FOR ONE GLORIOUS MOMENT!
I AM NUMBER ONE!
OH YES!
OHH YES!
I DID IT!
I DID IT
Oh...
This may not be too tough
of a server to go on,
but...
WHOO
For one...
GLORIOUS MOMENT...
I am
the victor.
Oh my god, I did it!
I did it!
I did it on a server
that's probably filled with
all kinds of bots.
I have no idea, though
Ohhhh
Shit.
Alright, we're fine...
Everything's fine.
Okay...
Well
Thank you for sacrificing yourself
to the great cause that is the Markimoo
The Markifart
Appreciates your candor.
Do not worry.
Your body will be imbibed
by the great country America.
And will be put to the best
of use possible.
Well, now that I'm number one,
what else can I do?
I mean, I always knew that I was number one
in my heart of hearts, but...
Now...
I...
I have so much potential.
AAH
That guy was...
That guy was for realsies.
The doom spiral has begun again.
The cycle begins anew
The death
Will come eventually
Soon
Just piles of turds,
don't mind us...
Just tryin' to scoop...
A little bit of victory...
There we go
That sweet, delicious victory...
YES
MORE FOR THE MARKIFART
The Markifart must survive!
The Markifart must continue to grow!
Whoa,
that guy almost got me...
But not today!
THE MARKIFART LIVES ON!
Whoa, shit, yeah.
Uh-oh.
Lag.
Euheheh
Euheh heh
It's this lag...
Maybe I should just go
into the corner and hide there,
and just keep my title.
Forever and ever.
Hehe
In perpetuity.
Hey, Chica, how's it going?
I'm a winner, Chica!
Chica's between my legs.
I'm a winner, Chica!
Look at me!
I know you think I'm a loser,
but it's okay,
I proved you wrong.
Ah
OH! OH NO!
OH NO!
OH, NO!
OHH,
NOOO!
Ah, whatever,
I was number one,
and I was number one for a while!
So I DID IT!
YEAH!
'MERICA'S NUMBER ONE!
Okay.
So thank you everybody
so much for watching,
I think in the next...
If I do another one of these,
I'm gonna play with you guys again,
and then try to get a big party going on
and then get number one with you guys!
Even though you guys always
try to sabotage me,
WHYYY?
So thank you everybody
so much for watching,
and as always,
I will see you
In the next video!
Bye bye!
Outro Music: Crazy La Paint by Minimusicman
Bada buuuuuuuum