INFJs generally have an all-or nothing approach to life - an almost insatiable
tendency to think in extremes. They’re either a success or a failure. Their performance was
excellent or completely abysmal. If they weren’t perfect, then they were a disaster.
INFJs rarely do middle of the road when it comes to anything in their lives.
A recent 16Personalities survey found this inflexible mindset to be,
not just a very common trait among INFJs,
but also, one that presents itself more extremely than in other personality types.
The survey also found, INFJs are likelier to think and behave in more extreme ways,
when in comes to many other parts of their lives.
So let’s explore; Why are INFJs so Extreme.
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More likely to have a nagging feelings about things they need to do
“91% of INFJs said they constantly have a nagging
feeling about all the things they need to do” 16Personalities.com
Only 76% of other personality types agreed with this statement,
so it definitely seems to be a far more prevailing thought pattern among INFJs,
and it might have something to do with the unique way their minds are structured.
INFJs have Introverted Intuition (Ni), and Introverted Thinking (Ti) as core cognitive
functions. This can make them more mentally oriented to future thinking and goal setting.
They’re able to take their thoughts one by one and start calculating probable outcomes,
and trajectories of actions. They’re then able to develop opinions on best and worst
case scenarios and the likelihood of each - mentally envisioning
the successes and consequences for a vast range of scenarios.
A mind that is wired to plan so intricately, can be exhausting to keep up with. Almost
like having too many internet tabs open at once and being unable to file them away.
In order to cope an INFJs mind will often force a shut down of certain thoughts and tasks deemed
too superficial or less important. While this can make an INFJ more focused and productive on
achieving personalized goals, it can often cause their lesser thoughts to fall by the
wayside - often leaving a nagging feeling that something is off or missing inside their mind.
More likely to go through the entire menu before ordering
“78% of INFJs said they always go through the entire menu
before deciding what to order” 16Personalities.com
The average among other personality types was 69%.
This greater agreement amongst INFJs, could indicate they are
more indecisive. Than other personality type.
INFJs often need to thoroughly think through many factors,
before moving forward with a decision, and this can naturally lead to some tentativeness.
When they have to choose between multiple things on a menu, or even
pick a favourite movie, song or drink, they can find it ridiculously difficult.
It can sometimes take them hours to decide what to buy when shopping because, they have
to weight up the many pros and cons. They’re able to see the good, and bad in everything,
so it can feel frustratingly harder to pick a favourite, or one thing over another because
to them, there is a benefit and opportunity cost with each choice.
This is probably why most INFJs need to look through the whole menu,
as how else would they know what all the options are for a cost/ benefit analysis.
More likely to get upset about having bad thoughts
“84% of INFJs said they feel upset if they catch
themselves having bad thoughts or impulses” 16Personalities.com
66% of other personalities said they did.
The extreme prevalence of this among INFJs, likely has a lot to do with their higher than
average empathy levels. INFJs are able to absorb other peoples emotions as if it were their own,
and as a consequence, they’re able to see themselves through other peoples eyes.
One one hand, this can be great as it makes them incredibly altruistic.
However, on the other, it can make them a lot more self critical,
especially about things they deem as being negatively perceived by others.
When they have a thought that can be categorized as bad, the tend to panic
about what others might think, were they to know. From this perspective,
INFJs don’t just have to contend with the bad thought, and what that means, but also an added
layer of the shame they feel from others, which is why it might be more upsetting.
More likely to re-read an email multiple time before sending
“86% of INFJs said they always reread an email after sending it” 16Personalities.com
The average among other personality types was 76%.
INFJ are probably likelier to do this, because of their higher sensitivity to others emotions
and their understanding of the power of language. INFJs tend to be very careful
with their words to avoid being misunderstood, or unintentionally hurting someones feelings.
Even after they press send on an email, an INFJs will often re-check it several times,
and ruminate over things like, grammatical errors and how well did I get my point across,
and I should have really wrote this instead. And maybe this
sounds a bit harsh. And oh could I have ended with a smiley face.
INFJs tend to be overly concerned with their image, even when it comes
to their email communications. This is not meant in a superficial way,
but more an altruistic one. They want their writing to inspire the receiver towards a
particular thought or action. So it’s not just about their personal image, but the
success of a cause, or something their trying to achieve, that can make them so particular.
More likely to ruminate over their day, at night
“79% of INFJs said they often stay awake at night
thinking about things that upset them during the day” 16Personalities.com
The average among other types was 59%. This disparity is likely do
with an INFJs Introverted Thinking Function.
INFJs are incredibly deep thinkers, who are able to see scenarios and reflect from
multiple angles. Whilst this usually makes them great problem solvers, it can leave
them more susceptible to overthinking - when your thoughts get out of control, and you’re
unable to shut it down. It can be incredibly unhealthy, obsessive and lead to nowhere.
Sometimes their constant analyzing can get to a point, of negatively affecting
many aspects of their life, such as their ability to get an adequate nights rest.
Their racing thoughts can be so engrossing, they won’t really want to go to sleep. They
could be consumed with trivial conversations of the past, to future possibilities or to
the absolute nonsensical, depriving them of much needed sleep throughout the night.
More likely to be emotionally moved by something beautiful
“87% of INFJs said they are deeply affected by natural beauty,
like blooming flowers” 16Personalities.com
Only 69% of other personality types agreed. So evidently being a deeply feeling person,
on extreme ends of every spectrum, has some benefits.
INFJs tend to be highly sensitive to the outside world, which means they can react more
strongly to both positive and negative experiences - both the depravity and
injustice, as well as the vibrancy and beauty that exists in our world.
Studies have shown this reaction shows up in areas of the brain associated with
experiencing strong emotions, as well as those involved in thinking and perceiving.
INFJs hardwired to appreciate and respond to what is beautiful. Not only that, but they’re
also predisposed to want to create beauty too. An INFJs intuition is very visual in nature,
so in seeing, and creating beauty, they can inspire their intuitive insights.
INFJs are extremely passionate and complex individuals, which is probably why they tend
to be on the extreme end, when it comes to particular thoughts and behaviors.
Their unique set of cognitive functions might also give them an innate ability
to sense and perceive the world, in a way that enables them to shift to
a wider range of perspectives, than other personality types.
Do you think the INFJ personality type tends to veer to extremes in their thoughts and behaviors?