The Angry Family.
The daddy was mad at the mommy.
"What world am I in?" "Just so you know, Ray,
we're getting the flower drapes. Just so you know, Ray,
I ordered the boring couch without the footrest!
And Ray, we're going to move in across the street
from your parents... just so you know!"
"No, no, no, no, no, bah, bah, bah, bah!"
"Faker!"
"What?"
"You could use the VCR but you don't want to,
so you pretend not to be able to! Faker!"
"Look around, everything in here is your decision! That lamp,
that painting, the flower drapes over the sink...
I hate those drapes! Look at it, they're one pattern
and the walls are totally a different pattern.
Seriously, what were you thinking with those drapes?"
"Come on! You stop it!
"What are you doing?" "Shift it down!"
The mommy was mad at the daddy.
"Why did you make me do that?" "I didn't know!
I didn't, I didn't..."
"What did you do Ray? What the hell did you do?"
"No, no..."
"I need to listen better?" "Yes, yes!"
"What is wrong with you? You can't tell I'm upset?
I mean after how many years,
you can't tell I'm not in the mood right now?"
"It's to make his life easier!
You told him to screw up their wedding,
what is wrong with you? It's their wedding!
Would you have done that with our wedding?
Would you have purposely done s-..."
"Now, get out!" "I am not getting...
what are you, crazy? Are you crazy?"
"Ah!"
"Just, give me..."
And the mommy and daddy were very mad at the grandpa.
"What are you talking about? I'm not going to pay anything.
The wallpaper is fine!"
"I want it the same! Do you hear me?
Exactly, exactly the same! And I mean exactly the same!"
"It's your father, isn't it?
Now listen to me, if you were to... God forbid...
and I get the children, I'm willing to leave him."
"No, this is completely different.
I have to do everything around this house!
If I don't do it, it doesn't get done."
"Well that's because... now take it easy...
that's how it's suppose to be."
"No, what are you doing?" "Oh!"
"Look what you did. Are you happy now?
"You're making me nervous, giving me the stunk eye!"
"All of the sudden I'm not driving the kids?
Where's this coming from?"
"From my near death experience!
It's amazing your license hasn't been revoked already."
"Ah, let them take it.
The damn thing's expired anyhow."
"Oh God..."
"What?"
"Frank! You told me you took care of it.
What the hell is wrong with you?"
"You're driving without a valid license?"
"I didn't want to wait in those long lines!
Besides, I kind of like the picture on this one.
See? 10 pounds lighter and more hair!"
The grandma got mad at everybody.
I did not!
It's wonderful...
"We decided that Bernie and Linda
are going to be their guardians."
"No one's having your sauce until you talk to her!"
"I can't believe you!
If there's every anything wrong, it's PMS. Huh?
Sometimes I just don't know what to do!
Sometimes I just want to smack you!"
"Debra's right Raymond!"
The grownups were always very loud.
It hurt the kid's ears.
The end.