[classical music playing]
Good afternoon, sir.
Could we interest you in some chocolate?
Chocolate? Did you say chocolate?
Yes, sir. With or without nuts?
Chocolate? Chocolate?! Chocolate!
[laughing]
Hey, that's not fair.
Cowboys couldn't afford cannons.
They couldn't afford station wagons, either.
Nice paneling.
Alright, pinhead, your time is up.
Who you calling pinhead?
Wow.
I always come to work at 3:00 A.M.
This is when I count the sesame seeds.
What are you doing here?
Uhh, I forgot my, uh--
And why is the patty vault open?
Oh, I thought that, uh,--
And why are you holding a patty behind your back?
I... I... I... no, I didn't do--
And why are you acting so nervous?
And why are you sweating so much?
And why do you look so hungry? And...
You like Krabby Patties, don't you, Squidward?
All you have to do is answer the phone.
Aye aye, Captain.
[ringing]
Is this the Krusty Krab?
No, this is Patrick.
[whistling]
[ringing]
Is this the Krusty Krab?
No, this is Patrick.
[whistling]
[ringing]
Is this the Krusty Krab?
No! This is Patrick!
Ah.
[Patrick] I am not a Krusty Krab.
Pardon me, Ugly Sponge coming through.
People respect self esteem.
[slurping]
Hi. I am very ugly.
But you should enjoy the movie anyway.
Excuse me, sir.
I hope my horrible ugliness won't be a distraction to you.
Not an all, boy. [sniffing]
[groaning]
Ah.
Oh, but wait.
There's something else I wanted to ask you two.
Oh, what was it?
Oh, yeah, yeah. Don't you two have any brains?!
Squidward, we don't need television,
not as long as we have our... imagination.
Ooh.
Why don't we try being nice?
Ah, okay.
Remember, Patrick, flatter the customer.
Make him feel good.
Hello.
I love you.
I think you laid it on
a teensy bit thick there, old pal.
[music playing]
Ah, no, I lost my pen.
- You can borrow mine. - Thanks.
[SpongeBob] I lost something once.
[music playing]
I lost something I couldn't live without.
My identity.
But sir.
I thought I sent you away, cretin.
But, sir, there's gotta be something I need to improve on.
Anything!
All right, the sauce.
[gasping] Ooh. What?
The sauce. I don't know. You're using too much sauce.
Okay? Reviews over.
Uh, uh, uh.
What?
Uh, uh, uh.
[Plankton] What's the matter with you?
Ah.
SpongeBob, thanks for finally getting rid
of that horse.
You're welcome, Mr. Krabs.
Now, if we could just get rid of Squidward.
[laughing]
Good one, sir.
Ah ha. It worked girl.
I'll just keep ya back here until Patrick finishes
that stable I asked him to build.
Ah.
Come on, SpongeBob, take the door
and smash my face back.
I can't. It was one thing doing it by accident,
but I can't hurt you on purpose.
You'd better hurt me or I'm really gonna hurt you!
Well, okay.
Now, don't hold back, SpongeBob.
Just really let me have it.
Just remember, Squidward, this is going to hurt me
more than it's going to hurt you.
Um, okay, let me just memorize--
Ow! Hey, I wasn't ready.
Would you mind waiting 'til I--
Hang on, you're starting to look like your old self again.
Nope, skill too handsome.
It's still not working.
Maybe I'm not doing it hard enough.
So, hang on a second.
Let me--
[groaning]
[music playing]
[SpongeBob] Yikes.
Squidward, you're even more handsome now.
[bellowing]
[Patrick bellowing]
[bellowing]
What are you, simpletons doing?
[gasping]
[Patrick] You're going to look good
on my mantle!
[panting]
Friends forever, SpongeBob!
[panting]
[music playing]
[panting]
[music playing]
I gotcha now, SpongeBob. [grunting]
Patrick, no!
Wow.
Oh, SpongeBob, Can you come here, please?
I couldn't find that watch anywhere.
All I found was this stuff.
I fell in.
And that guy
Why do you think of Mr. Krab's new plaid kilt?
P-P-P-P-Plaid?
Hey!
[clucking]
Well, you don't have to be nasty about it.
[clucking]
Wow.
Okay, now, how many of you have played
musical instruments before?
Do instruments of torture count?
No.
Is mayonnaise an instrument?
No, Patrick, mayonnaise is not an instrument.
Horseradish is not an instrument either.
Wow.
Hi. How are ya?
What happen to you?
Oh, I got normal.
Whatever that means. Hey, SpongeBob.
What do you say we charge
into Jellyfish Fields nets ablaze?!
Oh, let's do something normal, like window shopping.
Let's do this.
[grunting]
Yeehaw. Hey, your turn.
I think I'll pass.
Wow.
The time has come to double, no, triple our efforts!
How about a break? We've been at it for days.
Think about the children.
That's what I did. Use the children to crawl
into small places you couldn't normally reach.
This is a load of barnacles.
I heard that!
Wow.
How tough are ya?
How tough am I? You got a new bottle of ketchup?
- Sure. - It's on!
[grunting]
[panting]
[grunting]
If I could just run this under some hot water.
Get outta here.
This place is too tough for you, little man.
Too tough for me? That's downright ridiculous.
I'll have you know, I stubbed my toe last week
while watering my spice garden,
and I only cried for 20 minutes.
Wow.
Let's investigate this crime and catch the low life
who's responsible.
Give it a rest, Patrick. There's no crime to investigate.
Now, go home.
Stupid Patrick. I didn't do anything wrong.
Ah, what am I getting so worked up about?
Wow.
Goodlands, half a league.
[neighing]
Badlands, 20,000 leagues?
[groaning]
Wow.
[classical music playing, clapping]
[classical music playing]