Hey guys!
So this is the first video of the year
and.. it an.. and it's two weeks into the year
so we're already behind schedule
Sorry guys I was in Hawaii
and hence the long hair
I don't know what that has to do with Hawaii
I don't know Hawaii
Back to the topic.
So it's about two weeks into the new year and it's right about that time
where half the people who make new years resolutions have already given up.
The other half are about to give up.
And of course there's the half that you know never made resolutions.
Plus the half of people that actually keep their resolutions.
That's four halves...?
Not starting off strong Ryan
But anyway!
I don't know about you guys but I always make New Year's resolutions.
And to be completely honest
I don't think I've ever kept one throughout the entire year
I mean last year my resolution was to stop drinking energy drinks
And if you guys watch the behind-the-scenes
You know that I didn't even come close
And after really thinking about it and questioning
Why I always fail my new year's resolutions
I think I figured it out!
I always start the year off strong but then over time
I slowly start BSing myself and
Convincing myself that I'm not cheating on my goals but I am.
It sounds confusing...
Let me just show you!
Here's how the beginning of last year kinda looked like for me.
This ain't so bad I don't even feel like having an energy drink.
But I do have to work today so maybe just one for emergencies
I mean last year I was drinking five a day, so two a day is still an improvement.
Last time I checked, 3 is still less than 5
So was 4
5 would be a tie with last year, so I probably shouldn't...
But then again a tie does hang from a neck and a neck is connected to the head
so this area could be called the ned or the heck, as in "Eh? What the heck."
but this year, NOPE! This year's going to be different.
I'm not gonna BS myself this year
And to be sure of that, I'm gonna hold myself accountable... with me.
Here's your list of resolutions:
Eat healthier, don't offend people,
no more cursing, fart jokes, dark jokes,
bad puns, dabs and redbull
Actually that should say energy drinks, not Redbull.
Actually that's probably another thing you should stop doing.
You're always promoting random brands for free.
Alright, add it to list then.
Okay!
See once you have your resolutions all you have to do is
not BS yourself, hold yourself accountable and just stick with it.
Especially because right now two weeks into the new year
That's when everybody gives up on their goals.
Like that's statistically proven,
When people...don't fact-check me because I made that up.
But you get the point.
Here's some examples of some types of people that
You don't want to be, two weeks into the new year starting with:
"The New Years Hype" Person
We have all seen it before.
And I'm not gonna lie I've been guilty of it too.
"The New Years Hype" person is exactly what it sounds like.
It's somebody who is overly hyped for the New Year
They're so sick of what happened in the previous year that they're ready to move on
They spent so much time telling other people and themselves
How great this new year is going to be
And how it's nothing compared to the last year
That they actually don't make any changes at all.
You've seen 'em before they all say the same old common basic bi-
*UHP* What?
Cursing, remember?
Right. They say all the same old
Common basic types of things, such as
(Epic voice) I am so ready for 2017! But is 2017 ready for me?
Don't live in the past! Live in the now!
#2017 #Ready
Man, I'm so ready for 2017
And I'm ready to put in f**king work!
What? No! That shouldn't count
I was just acting as someone else.
You still cursed.
I didn't know it counted in my videos too.
Video or not.. OK, well, I didn't know that. See?
So can I just start over?
*sigh* Fine.. but no more chances after that.
"The Technicality Cheater"
Basically this is the guy who cheats on the resolution by a technicality.
Like I mentioned earlier people who BS themselves.
Something I am guilty of...
Actually i'm probably guilty of everything you guys see here
Because if not I wouldn't have thought of it
I wrote this thinking about myself in the past. Yeah, I'm annoying
But anyway! This is the guy who BSes himself
Into thinking that he's not cheating on his goals when he really is...
Basically they're cheating so it defeats the whole purpose.
Look something like this.
Just gonna have one drink a day~
Just gonna have one a day..
Just gonna have one slice....
What?
*buzz*
What? That was just for the skit, I didn't even eat it!
Ryan. I'm you, Okay?
I see all the behind-the-scenes too. You can't hide things from me.
*louder buzz*
"The Unrealistic Goals" Person
I know this is gonna sound the opposite of every inspirational speaker.
Sometimes I don't think it's good to set your goals too high.
At least right away.
Especially for one year if you set your goal too high
And you don't see any progress, like, it's unmotivating.
This is actually not a big part of not BSing yourself
You have to be realistic
Yep, this is gonna be the year.
Is the year I become a billionaire!
Nice, man. I mean you could do it if you really believe
And I'm going to practice basketball every single day
And finally make it into an NBA team!
Yeah man. Go for it
Plus i'm going to travel the entire world and go to every single country
Do it, man. We're rooting for you.
You know what? This is finally going to be the year that I get a girlfriend. )
HAHAHAHA *laughs hysterically*
Yeah~~ Oooookay~~ HAHAHAHA *laughs hysterically*
Suuuure man~~ HAHAHAHA *laughs hysterically*
HAHAHAHA *laughs hysterically*
"The Way Too Easy Goals" Person
pretty much the opposite of the unrealistic goals person
this is the guy who set their goals
too easy to the point where it's like
why do you even have that goal.
*sigh*
i need to stop using Vine.(RIP Vine)
the person in denial
probably all know at least one of these
people this is the person that makes
resolutions about everything other than
the actual obvious problem that they have
No more
Ah, I feel better already
"The Person From China"
It's not even New Years yet!
"The Reset Button" Person
Button, button, I don't know why people
think I say that weird
buh-nn is that how you are supposed to say it? buh-nn
Butt-on there is two T's you gotta say one of them
this is the guys who thinks that just because it's a new year
it's a reset button on everything that
happened in the past year
Hey man, um, I know we haven't talked in a while
but uh..I figured since this is the new year maybe
we could just start over, you know, and I'm willing
to put everything that happened between
us behind me if you are, so, what do you say?
You stole my wallet
made out with Kat while we were still dating
and you ran over my grandmother with your car
Yes, and as bad as those things were you
know i am still willing to put it all behind me
wait is that my wallet
is that you Kat?
wait...
*GASP*
see it's all behind me now
you're failing two of them now?
the pun wasn't even that bad and how was that a dark joke
you killed a grandmother and threw her ashes on the ground
Yes, yes, okay, I see your point but
the pun wasn't that bad
It really was though
And that's your opinion
my opinion was that it's fine
We're the same person
Fine then let's ask somebody else then
Was the pun that bad?
IT'S NOT...
See? Hey, c'mon you can't take the pun goal away from
me I'm actually working really hard on that one
Fine but you still lose the
dark jokes resolution
Deal
"The Secretive" Person
Now these are people who have resolutions that they don't want to
tell anyone about because it's probably
embarrassing and these are the hardest
resolutions to keep because they're secretive
it's literally all on you
hey Ryan can I borrow your-
were you just-
it's not what it looks like
-dabbing?
N-n-n-no I- I was just
(dabs)
I have a problem
Hey, just curious, but why
the lotion if you're just dabbing? Well
why not? I mean, I do use it throughout my
entire day. After all it is Vaseline
Intensive Care Advanced Repair, which can
heal your dry damaged skin in less than
five days *tink*
You seem to know a lot about moisturizing lotion.
Yeah, I guess you could say I
DAB-ble
You know what, I give up.
Wait what?
It's only been one day and I've already
ruined all my resolutions already.
Well, not all of them, I mean, you still have no cursing
no redbull, no fart jokes. Surprisingly
actually I thought those will be the first one to
go and the most important one of all
don't BS yourself remember
and if you ask me actually think you're
doing a really good job with that one
I mean you didn't lie to yourself when
you failed, you accepted it, and now you can
learn from your failures and improve.
Yeah. Hey you know what, you're right it
doesn't matter if you fail your
resolutions as long as you don't BS
yourself actually I dont even have to say BS
anymore I'm just gonna say it
don't bullsh*t yourself
oh wow, okay, uh, I think you're kind of
missing the point of what I was trying to...
It doesn't matter that I failed all my resolutions
in fact, I should fail them, so that i can improve!
No you shouldn't try to fail them
I think...
No! You know what, you're right
I need to stop bullsh*tting myself and just
be me someone that makes bad puns and
fart jokes and, and kills
grandmothers and throws their ashes on the ground
Well, uhh...
Because being honest with yourself and acknowledging your flaws and your
fails are really the only way anyone can
actually improve!
Well I guess that last
part was kind of accurate
Either that or you...
...could also improve yourself with a nice
cold refreshing sugar-free Red Bull
energy drink
now that is some good bull
(fart)
Sh*t
TEEHEE