We just met, but I know you're my soulmate
I've got your name tattooed on my chest, neck, and face
Let's get hitched,
right away,
or at least pick a date
I've got next week open
When do you have open?
I sent you my left ear, but you tossed it off the pier
Then said something I couldn't hear
What?
I gave you all my string and my fingernail clippings
I hope I don't sound deranged, but
I'd chop off my head for you
I just went off my meds for you
I drank a bottle of Krazy Glue
And lick a bathroom attendant's shoe
Oooh, that's good shoe
I would peel you a million grapes
And make a portrait using audiotapes
Yes, I'll protect you from robots
and futuristic apes
(Hooh)
Get your damn stinking paws off my girlfriend
You dirty ape from the future
Calm down, you crazy clown
What is wrong with you?
Stop offering things that you'll never have to do
Just take your pills,
pay your bills,
I don't want you dead
Why would I want a boyfriend who doesn't have a head?
A little pot of glass pull ma hard on through my ass
You know what you could do for me
What baby?
The dishes and the trash, let's take that tango class
Then watch some live time TV
I'll shop at Target with you
Buy you tickets to Dave Matthews
I'll go to brunch with your bookclub friends
I'll tell you that: "You're not fat" again
This nightmare never ends
I would rather eat fifty grenades
and wear a speedo made of razor blades
Than have to deal with you baby
and your stupid mom
The key of awesome
Hey everybody thanks for watching another episode of key of awesome
I wanna give a big thanks to my friend Elle
And if you want to watch any of her amazing series: "What's up Elle?" ,
Click down here
Aw, thanks Mark and guys, if you want to check out more key of awesome videos, click over there
right there
I have to go to the bathroom
me too
[electric guitar]