- It's not the chairs that are comfortable.
It's-it's my (beep). (Jordan laughing)
I have the most comfortable (beep) in the world!
- Cyanide and Happiness, number four.
What could possibly go wrong?
(flatline beeping)
Right?
Today, we're learning about
and breaking down the crazy medical type situations
and injuries that happen in the dark comedy show.
(record scratching)
All right, let's dive right in.
(soothing jazz music)
- This is the most comfortable-
Oh my God! (Jordan laughing)
How is this even possible?
- Uh-oh.
- It's not the chairs that are comfortable.
It's-it's my (beep). (Jordan laughing)
- I have the most comfortable (beep) in the world!
- Well, it brings up an interesting point,
it's very important to have a good chair
because of like back support and comfortability.
Good, comfortable chair where the pressure
is actually distributed kind of throughout your tuchus
will be very important.
(Man laughing)
(upbeat music) Oh my God. (laughs)
Just sitting everywhere.
(Jordan laughing)
I like the fact that we got stick figures
but somewhere in there I saw a butt.
(upbeat music)
- You have (beep) cancer.
- Oh my gosh!
That's such a messed up set up.
You can have cancer of muscles.
You can have, you know, soft tissue tumors.
You can have rectal cancer.
So let's see where this doctor is talking about.
- It's when you have cancer in your (beep).
- Oh my God, how could this happen?
- Think, have you sat on anything radioactive lately?
(upbeat music) (Jordan laughing)
- Oh man, sorry buddy.
We hear radioactive, it breaks down your cells.
It will continue to replicate itself
and that's basically a simple way
of describing how cancer cells just continue.
It's the same cell just repeating itself.
- How much longer do I have?
(ominous drum boom) (Jordan laughing)
- Wow!
23 years old and died of cancer, that's horrible.
Somebody actually gets cancers at a young age,
typically do better.
So cancer is not a death sentence.
There are some cancers that have treatments,
some that don't.
Some that have a lot of experimental things.
There's a lot of different factors
that come into play when it's related to cancer,
- (crying) Grandpa, I don't want you to go.
- Don't be sad.
- You can see the screen in the back.
It's actually a cardiac monitor.
Typically a cardiac monitor
will have a lot more things on it.
Usually an EKG rhythm.
And then sometimes you'll see a respiratory rate.
- I'll be with your grandma, and someday all be together.
- This is common.
Typically people who get very sick,
their skin changes different colors
versus you can see the family members
have different colored skin.
People potentially are elderly or terminal.
We know that there's a point at which
they're potentially going to die soon.
It is hard, it is emotional.
- Together again. (machine beeping)
(machine flatline beeps) - Oh.
Poor thing!
If the monitor goes asystolic, which is no beats,
you actually just double check
to make sure that everything is plugged in correctly.
Then you actually check to see if the patient's responsive.
A lot of times you'll hear stories
where the monitor said somebody was dead.
Somebody starts CPR and the patient's awake
and yelling at them.
(Grandpa screaming) - Oh!
Nothing, there's nothing!
Just, it's the end. (Mom yelling)
Just the end!
Darkness, darkness all around!
Nothing, nothing! (chokes)
- What? (monitor flatline beeping)
Was that?
There's something called Lazarus syndrome.
This happens occasionally.
Maybe a couple seconds later
they actually get a heartbeat back.
And then the patient dies again.
There are accounts of people who have passed away
and then come back.
Nice feelings per se, not typically emptiness.
(machine flatline beeping)
- (laughs) They all do that.
- What?
The nurse just pulling out the plug,
turning off the monitor, and saying, ha everybody does that.
Not good bedside manner.
Typically you also don't just cover the patient up either.
You allow the family to be with the patient
as long as they want.
You bring chairs, you bring tissues,
you bring water, coffee, whatever people need
to be with a family member,
- A brain transplant takes some getting used to.
- I've never heard of a successful brain transplant.
- You wanna get plenty of rest and-
- Wait, wait, I-I got a brain transplant?
- Yep, just in time too.
(Jordan laughing)
- I do like the depiction
of where the surgery potentially was.
Typically, probably gonna be bandage up pretty well
after a brain transplant.
There could be confusion after you have brain surgery.
- You would've been- - Wait, wait!
Who did it come from?
- Oh, someone tried to drive his motorcycle
out of a building and he got pancaked.
- Whoa.
The question ends up being the personality of the brain.
Doesn't continue on, because it's just in a new body
but it's the same brain?
Big, life question there.
Oh my gosh, please.
(Motorcyclist laughing) - Oh!
- Look how fast I'm going! - My goodness.
- Oh shi- - Okay.
This brings up a good point.
They actually have like a lot of rules
and hoops to jump through
so you don't abuse the organ that you're getting.
Typically, if you're an alcoholic
that caused the liver to be destroyed in the first place,
they actually won't give you another liver
if you continue to drink
because you are just going to potentially kill
the next liver.
- Come on honey, we can make it!
The border is only a few more feet.
- So if she's running, she's pregnant, you can still run.
Is that the best thing to be running
and jacking up your heart rate?
Probably not.
The baby's pretty much full grown.
Your ability to perform in the sense of exertion
is gonna be diminished, but you can still do it.
Wait a minute, you're now leaving Canada?
Soory to see you go, eh?
Oh my gosh, so stereotypical.
We're full, go home.
Oh my gosh!
- I can't go any further,
this baby is coming out now! - Oh no!
- No, not yet.
My son- (Jordan laughing)
- I don't know if you guys caught that,
but he closed her legs.
Sometimes babies come out and super quick,
or takes 24 hours, or 48 hours, it all depends.
Can you actually stop a pregnancy
or delivery from happening?
No, but you could potentially like slow it down a little.
(Dad grunting)
- Glad to help out, eh? - Oh my gosh.
- Listen, Barbara, when I tell you to push,
I want you to give it everything you've got.
- Wait, what?
- We've only got one shot at this, Barbara.
Push! - What the- oh my gosh.
Okay, okay.
There are definitely rules
about babies being born in the United States,
they will be a US citizen at that point.
I didn't make the rules.
(Mother grunting)
(baby crying)
(Jordan gasping)
(laughing) Oh my gosh.
No!
In real life, when somebody is in labor
we put them in a position called the McRoberts position
which is actually in the stirrups, when their legs
and their knees are kind of up towards their chest.
Sometimes, the baby doesn't want to come out.
So what you end up doing is doing super pubic pressure
to get the baby's head to go down,
to get underneath the bone.
Nobody's jumping on the belly, nothing like that.
- Now pinch the nose
and give two rescue breaths. - Okay, coach.
(student breathing) - [Coach] Good.
- Oh, they're doing CPR.
All right, lift the chin, pinch the nose,
two rescue breaths, okay.
Breathing is important,
but chest compressions is more important.
Get 'em to the hospital
so we can get them other medications.
But the survival rate, unfortunately,
of somebody who's gone into cardiac arrest
is pretty darn low.
- [Coach] Now continue the chest compressions.
- One and two
and three and four. - Good.
- Chest compressions are done
at a rate of 100 times a minute.
You do it to a song in your head, "Staying Alive" is classic
but there are a lot of other songs out there,
but remember you gotta do it hard and fast.
(Dummy gasping)
- Oh my gosh, his dummy is alive.
- I'm alive?
(crickets chirping) - Like-
That individual did good CPR.
What is happening? - Oh my God!
Oh my God, oh my God! (creepy violin music)
- The creepy music. (Dummy screaming muffled)
(Jordan gasping)
- What? (Dummy screaming muffled)
(Coach grunting)
(garbage bin rattling)
Wow!
This guy just did pillow therapy.
What the heck, does it actually work?
You typically can breathe through it,
unless you're getting your airway collapsed.
Nobody does that.
Don't do that.
If anybody's interested in learning CPR, BLS, ACLS,
in the United States, the American Heart Association,
those courses all over the place.
A lot of times they're done at schools,
universities, colleges, that sort of thing.
You could actually have somebody come and teach everybody
and then you could be certified.
The certification lasts for two years
and then you need to get re-certified
if you wanted to keep it.
This was crazy, it was awesome!
It really entertaining!
I was kind of shocked
and taken back at some of the scenes that I saw,
but I liked it, if you guys liked this,
check out more craziness with these other
Cyanide and Happiness reacts that I did.
Thank you so much for watching, stay healthy my friends.
(upbeat music)