- And can I get a large pizza with
pineapple on it.
Ooh.
- Yeah, sure.
- Isn't that just wrong.
Pineapple on pizza.
Don't you want to just call the cops and
have me arrested for bad taste?
- No, not at all actually.
- I'm so bad.
You better, you better spank me.
Ooh,
I'm disgusting.
You're disgusted.
- Ma'am with all due respect, I work at Pizza Hut.
Nothing can disgust me anymore.
- Ugh.
That's hot.
- Every Pizza Hut ever.
- Here at Pizza Hut,
we like to stay up to date with our competitors.
You may have noticed Domino's highly popular pizza tracker.
Well here at Pizza Hut, we have our own pizza tracker.
His name is Dennis.
He's going to text you updates while driving.
- Okay.
(car engine)
(crashing)
- Pizza, pizza.
- Hi, welcome to Pizza Hut.
No one out pizzas, the Hut.
- What does that even mean?
- Huh?
- You're using pizza as a verb.
You can't pizza someone.
How do you out pizza someone?
- Well, actually...
- Come on push, you have to push.
- You got this sweetheart, I believe in you.
- Oh, it's beautiful.
- Is it a boy or a girl?
- Neither.
It's a pizza.
- You made baby with a pizza?!
- Sorry, buddy.
Looks like you got out pizza'd.
- Nooo!
- Still hot.
- Right?
- So the doctor kills the baby?
- No, he eats the pizza.
- Pizza.
- So close.
Thank you for calling Pizza Hut.
Can I interest you in Domino's?
- Hi, Pizza Hut?
You're my favorite pizza place.
- Hahaha, that's great Shane.
Do you want to actually order something this time or what?
(dial tone)
Shane?
- Hi, grim reaper?
- Pepperonis.
- 50 boxes, that's a lot. (phone ringing)
- Hello, this is pi...
Ah, damn it.
The phone's covered in grease again.
- Oh, I got it, I got it.
Okay.
Okay, I got it.
Hold on one second.
Oh, I got it. - Okay, I'm coming.
- No, no, no.
I got it.
Okay, hold on. - Dude.
- I'm just gonna pick it up.
- I...
Mostly...
I'm just going to...
I'm just...
- Why don't you just pick it up.
- No, I have it.
I literally have it.
I have it.
- Whoa whoa, whoa. - Okay, whoa.
- I have the grease phone. - I have the grease phone.
- Oh god it's so...
- Let's put it up...
- Hello, is anyone there?
I'm trying to order a pizza for Shane Topp.
- Sauce.
- Can I get two pepperoni pizzas.
And do you guys do that thing where the
crust is stuff with cheese?
- Oh yeah.
Everything here is stuffed with cheese.
You're not paying in cash are you?
- Oh no, I'm not.
- Wha..
How did...
- That's just how things go here.
Everything here is stuffed with cheese.
- Nice.
- Pizza.
- Go, go, go, go, go.
- Come on, come one.
Let's go.
- Go, go, go, go.
- Let's go, let's go, let's go.
Go, go, go, go.
Come on.
Go, go.
(crashing)
- Pizza Hut, fresc pizca ont it way.
- You made baby with a pizza?!
- Sorry baby.
I don't know why I said baby.
(laughing)
I don't know why I said baby.
- Sorry baby.
- Right?
- So the pizza's a pizza?
- Yeah, dude.
- So...
How did he get out pizza'd?
(laughing)
- Mm, want a bite?
Or would that be weird?
- That'd be a little weird.
- Oh, that'd be weird?
(laughing)
- Owe, okay.
I got it. - It's fine, it's fine.
- No, I got it, I got it.
- I got it, I got it. - Okay, I got it.
- I got it, I got it.
Okay. - Oh, come on.
- All right, take it. - Oh, geeze.
Oh god, it's so oi...
- Let's put on the back.
Did you put butter on this?
- I didn't put,
I didn't put butter on nothing.
- It doesn't even have a battery.
- You don't even have a battery.
(laughing)
- I got it, I said I got it
- I got the grease phone.
- I have the grease phone. - I have the grease phone.
- Let's go, let's go.
Come on, go, go, go.
Come on, let's go, let's go.
- He drives a Porsche.
- Oh, wow.
- Wow, wow.