-Here's how the game works.
On our phones, we're each gonna get
a couple of "fill in the blank" style prompts,
like "A good name for a singles bar for pirates is blank."
Then we each secretly type in the funniest answer
that we can think of, and when we're done,
two answers will go head-to-head on the big screen,
and the other players, along with The Roots,
will vote on which one they think is funnier,
but you don't know whose answer is whose until after you vote.
Okay. Let's all take our seats and grab our phones.
Here we go. And let's start this game up.
Quiplash. Let's do it.
-Sit back and relax.
-Yeah.
And it's hosted by, like, a virtual host.
That's him right there. -It's time for "Quiplash,"
with your host Josh Schmidty Schmidtstenstein.
-That's you, isn't it? -No, that's not me.
-That's the real thing. That's the guy.
It's how the game is played. All right, here we go.
All right, so we're all in.
I got a fang.
-I don't like my image. I want to change it.
-I know. I got a fang.
All right. Round one, here we go.
-The more folks who choose your answer, the more points you get.
Go! -All right, here we go.
What do we got?
Oh.
You got a good one? -Uh-huh.
-I don't.
-I set mine in! -No! You did already?!
[ Cheers and applause ]
-Oh, oh.
-[ Laughing ] I think it's really good.
Vote for me. -I'm in, I'm in.
Oh, wait! You're not in.
-I'm in! -Oh, yeah, you are.
No, you're not. -Wait!
[ Laughter ]
-You have to answer -- You have another question.
You got two questions. -Oh, shoot!
[ Laughter ]
-You got to be funny twice.
Oh [bleep] I spelled things wrong.
Shoot! [ Laughter ]
-Unbelievable.
All right, there it is. [ Cheers and applause ]
All right, here we go. -A new name for bananas.
-A new name for bananas.
-I win.
-You can't say it was yours. -Oh, I can't?
-No. -Oh.
I think Nannies is really funny. -No.
-No! Me!
Yes! I crushed on that one, man.
-That's terrible! -That wasn't even that funny.
-That wasn't even that funny. Nannies...
-Next prompt.
-Ralph Cramden? -Who do I love more?
-One of those is really good. -Ah-ha-ha.
♪♪
Oh! It's a tie.
-A tie. -Oh.
-All right. -Up next...
-"I Cry a Lot." Oh, come on!
Come on, man! [ Laughter ]
That is cheap.
That's cheap. That's a cheap laugh.
-The musical. -I got to vote for it.
Yeah, I got to vote -- I know.
-That's bull!
-Bang bang! -That was perfect!
-Oh, my. You got a Quiplash!
Tariq, well done, man. -You know what that means.
-You know what that means.
We need more women on this panel.
[ Cheers and applause ]
-I didn't -- I didn't answer.
-Really? Really?
-[ Laughing ] Natural booty!
[ Laughing ]
[ Cheers and applause ]
-Nice. Che, nice job.
-I'm voting for you, Che,
because I want to be on "SNL" again.
-That's all for round one.
-Let's see who's in the lead now.
-That's it? -No, that's only round one.
We're only gonna play two rounds.
Who's in the lead right now? -Not me.
-Oh! -Get on my level.
Get on my level. Let's go.
-This is not good. -Get on my level?
All right, round two. Double the points.
-Double, double. Okay. I have to put my funny cap on.
-Yeah, I know, exactly. All right, here we go.
Ready? Uh, okay.
♪♪
-[ Laughing ]
-I think I'm gonna win this one.
-No, I'm gonna lose this one.
-Oh, I'm waiting on y'all.
-Uh...
-[ Chuckling ]
[ Both laugh ]
♪♪
-All right. That was so stupid, but I tried.
-There's no way I don't win all of these.
[ Laughter ]
-This is so unfair because Che really is a comedic writer.
-Yeah, exactly.
-Our first prompt is...
Okay. Voting time.
Pick your favorite.
-An outhouse with no walls.
[ Laughter ]
-One of those is mine.
-Yeah, I know which one -- Come on.
-Enough with the natural booty, man.
All right, we get it! -Exactly.
-We get it. -Oh, God.
-Oh! Nice!
You're so good. -I'm in the house.
That was me. -Moving on.
-It's voting time. [ Laughter ]
-"Please"!
Oh, I got to vote. What happened?
I went to Google. Oh.
-Aah! -Jimmy!
-Come on, man. -Aw, man.
-Yo! You're getting close now, man.
All right. -Okay, next one.
Ready, set, vote. [ Laughter ]
-Come on. Yo! Che!
Enough with the -- I'm not doing it.
Enough with the boners and booties!
-Ridiculous. -It's cheap shots!
-I'm not doing it, man. I can't do it.
-It's horrible! -Come on, man.
-Use your brain, not your boner! -That's perfect comedy.
-Roots, don't vote. Come on.
-It's irony. -I know, I know.
It's a callback. It's a lot of comedy things.
-Oh, that's terrible! -Oh, my gosh!
I got your back! I got your back!
-I Lost My Harry Pott! That's amazing.
-I know! I did -- I did you.
I get that. -Next one.
[ Laughter ]
-I cannot with you!
-One of those is mine. [ Laughter ]
-"One of those is mine." -One of those is mine.
-Oh. Oh, Che got this one.
-Oh! -Hey!
-That's what I'm talking about. Little respect right there.
-We got your message already -- natural booty, okay.
-Oh, that's it! Let's see who the winner is.
This is gonna be tight. This is gonna be close.
Come on!
[ Drumroll ]
Yeah! Oh! Oh!
[ Cheers and applause ]
Yes! Yes!
Yeah!
That's how you do it right there.
My thanks to Taraji -- sorry.
Michael Che, Tariq Trotter, and The Roots.
We're talking to Taraji after the break.
Stick around, everybody. Taraji, it was close.
[ Cheers and applause ]