13 Crazy Lawsuits You Won’t Believe Actually Happened
13.
The Case of the Missing Pants Custom Cleaners in Washington, D.C. is a family-owned
business, the kind that emphasizes customer service and efficiency with a “Satisfaction
Guaranteed” sign placed out front.
Roy L. Pearson apparently took that sign very seriously.
Based on a $54,000,000 lawsuit he filed against the owners of Custom Cleaners in 2005, Pearson
alleged that a pair of pants he dropped off were not returned to him.
At one point during the two-day trial, the clothing item was displayed to Pearson by
defense attorneys with the corresponding ticket attached.
In a moment of Law & Order-style testimony, while cross-examining himself, Pearson became
visibly distraught as he insisted the pants weren’t his.
The court ultimately ruled in favor of the cleaners, though it remains unclear whether
Pearson was ever reunited with his beloved breaches.
12.
The Birds Stories of children communing with wildlife
seem like the stuff of animated movies.
But one little girl, eight-year-old Gabi Mann, reached national fame in 2015 when a local
news story emerged about the dozens upon dozens of crows who delivered what her family referred
to as “gifts” such as buttons and pieces of plastic.
Crows are highly intelligent and are known to express a form of gratitude to humans who
regularly feed them, as Gabi did.
Despite the fact that she became an internet sensation, Gabi’s neighbors didn’t find
the trade-off quite so adorable.
They alleged that the increase of birds caused damage to their roofs, left behind a disproportionate
amount of droppings and attracted rats and other vermin due to the accessibility of the
large feeders set up by Gabi and her parents.
This led them to sue the Manns for $200,000 in damages.
An unspecified out-of-court settlement was reached soon afterward, along with a new set
of feeding restrictions that still allowed Gabi to spend time with all her thankful friends.
11.
Alumni Spotlight A common narrative in the wake of the 2008
U.S. Financial Crisis and the ensuing recession was that qualified college graduates were
entering a workforce in which the jobs they trained for weren’t waiting for them.
Trina Thompson experienced this after she graduated from Monroe College in 2009.
The special detail that separates her story from all others is that Thompson decided to
sue her alma mater for $72,000 - the full cost of her tuition plus damages for the mental
anguish caused by three months of fruitless job-searching since her graduation.
While some argued that Thompson’s case was focusing much-needed attention on the issues
surrounding for-profit schools, the irregularity of the case made it a widespread subject of
debate about personal responsibility and legal ethics in the academic community.
10.
Age Limits Martin Stoner is a highly accomplished violinist,
so much so that he played for the New York City Ballet Orchestra for 25 years.
But after losing his job at the age of 60, Stoner attempted to enter a competition sponsored
by an organization called Young Concert Artists, a nonprofit that provides opportunities for
low-income musicians ages of 19 to 26.
The prize money was $75,000.
After being rejected due to his age and experience, Stoner filed an ageism lawsuit against YCA.
His case was dismissed, however, soon after Stoner requested that the presiding judge
recuse himself, arguing the 88-year-old jurist was incapable of handing down an appropriate
decision due to, of all things, his age.
9.
Half-Baked Prosecution In early 2004, a pair of teenage girls in
Durango, Colorado decided to bake several batches of cookies to distribute to neighbors
in the surrounding area.
Deciding to keep their good deed anonymous, the girls would place a plate of cookies at
each doorstep, then scurry away after knocking or ringing the doorbell.
The random gift and unsigned note accompanying it were apparently too much for Wanita Renea
Young, who suffered an anxiety attack and had to be hospitalized.
Young sued the girls, claiming they were not only responsible for her medical bills, but
that they should further compensate her for the pain and suffering brought on by the sudden
appearance of baked goods.
The truly crazy part is that Young was partially victorious.
The court ordered the girls to pay her $900 to cover the hospital visit.
8.
Unacceptable Experiencing rejection in any form can be
incredibly difficult to deal with.
For a law student, failing to get into the school on which they set their sights is a
huge disappointment.
Morgan L. Crutchfield, on the other hand, had a noticeably different situation - she
sued the Duncan School of Law at Lincoln Memorial University...for accepting her.
Despite her failure to complete her undergraduate studies at Penn State, LMU still permitted
her to enroll despite her ineligibility to take the state bar exam, which requires a
completed bachelor’s degree.
Having acquired $80,000 worth of debt related to student loans, Crutchfield argued that
the university’s decision to accept her constituted negligence.
She sought $750,000 in damages.
The case was dismissed in early 2013.
7.
Simply Revolting After viewing a particularly graphic 2005
episode of the TV show Fear Factor involving contestants eating blended rat meat, paralegal
Austin Aitken filed a $2,500,000 lawsuit against NBC.
Aitken claimed the experience of watching the challenge left him feeling woozy and nauseous,
eventually causing him to walk into a wall and injure himself.
U.S. District Judge Lesley Wells dismissed the suit and provided Aitken with some free
legal advice by suggesting he not appeal the decision, stating that enough of the court’s
time had been wasted already.
6.
Michael Jordan’s Doppleganger Most people would be flattered to hear that
they resemble a successful and inspiring celebrity athlete.
Allen Heckard had other feelings.
In 2006, Heckard filed a lawsuit against Michael Jordan because people regularly mistook him
for the star basketball player and athletic wear spokesman.
How much money was he seeking?
Over $800,000,000 - half from Jordan and half from Nike, the company which, Heckard argued,
had made Jordan into a globally-recognized figure.
He stated that the emotional distress caused by daily comparisons between him and Jordan
had become emotionally unbearable.
When far less flattering media attention labeled Heckard’s attempt at compensation as perhaps
the most frivolous lawsuit in history, he withdrew all legal action.
5.
Foul Ball In 2010, a New Jersey woman named Elizabeth
Lloyd was attending her eleven-year-old son’s little league practice game when a ball thrown
by another child struck her in the face.
Two years later, after sending numerous threatening letters to the boy’s family, Lloyd sued
the child for $150,000.
Her suit claimed that the accidental collision of the ball with her face constituted assault
and battery leading to permanent physical injuries.
As if being the subject of one lawsuit wasn’t stressful enough for a middle schooler, Lloyd’s
husband also sued the boy, blaming the baseball incident for their failing marriage.
Both cases were ultimately dismissed.
4.
“Wanna see a magic trick?”
In 2005, Minnesota resident and self-described “god” Christopher Roller sued magicians
David Blaine and David Copperfield for a combined $52,000,000.
Roller alleged that Copperfield had committed patent infringement against what Roller referred
to as his own “gifts,” even though no such patent recognition or application existed.
In targeting Blaine, Roller claimed the world-famous entertainer used witchcraft to steal illusions
from him.
The case was thrown out of court in 2007.
3.
Get it in Writing Next Time When Jesse Dimmick, a fugitive accused of
murder, forcibly entered the home of a married couple in Topeka, Kansas in 2009, he instructed
them at knifepoint to help him hide from law enforcement.
In exchange, he promised them compensation for the “use” of their space.
After Dimmick fell asleep, the couple fled and turned him in.
Once he was again imprisoned, the traumatized man and woman sued Dimmick for $75,000.
He responded with a countersuit demanding $235,000 for both his hospital bills and,
even better, breach of contract.
But a judge dismissed Dimmick’s far-fetched suit in 2012.
2.
Bagley v. Bagley After a car accident in Nevada that resulted
in the death of her husband, Barbara Bagley sued the driver of the car, who just happened
to be Barbara Bagley herself.
Because she was legally recognized as both the representative of her husband’s estate
and the air to it, she was able to sue herself for damages that would ultimately be paid
by her insurance company.
This approach would enable her to withhold any personal funds from going towards restitution
for her husband’s wrongful death.
She won on appeal after being dismissed at the district level.
The Utah Supreme Court upheld the lower court’s decision and Bagley emerged “victorious,”
so to speak.
1.
Man v.
The Almighty Not even John Grisham could think this one
up.
In 2007, Nebraska State Senator Ernie Chambers filed a lawsuit against God.
Yes, God.
Chambers stated his reasoning for the suit stemmed from an urge to make a point publicly
about frivolous lawsuits - a technique many found questionable at best.
In seeking a permanent injunction against the Big Man Upstairs for the infliction of
continuous pain and suffering on his constituents, Chambers aimed to express opposition to attempts
by his colleagues to make laws against certain categories of lawsuits.
He argued the commencement of legal action should be available to anyone regardless of
the course of action taking place.
A judge later ruled that God cannot be litigated against because He has no known address at
which summons can
be served.