How do you know when your ex is truly gone for good?
Like, how can you tell when it’s TRULY hopeless, and you should give up all hope of ever getting
back together?
Maybe there’s still a chance they’ll come back to you… or maybe it’s absolutely
over and you need to move on and forget about your ex for good.
By the end of this video, you’ll be able to evaluate your own situation and figure
out the answers to these questions… you’ll know if they’re gone for good, or if there’s
still a decent chance you might be able to win them back.
I’m Breakup Brad Browning, a world-renowned breakup coach with over 12 years of experience
and over 130,000 satisfied clients under my belt… so, suffice to say that I know breakups
pretty well, because I’ve seen it all.
Now, you’re probably watching this video because you want your ex back, right?
Or at least you think you MIGHT still want to get back together.
If you’re done with your ex and never want them back, then this video might still be
helpful, but it’s mainly for those who are hoping for another chance with their ex.
#1 - How Much Time Has Passed?
Look, let’s start with the obvious one…
I think you’re already aware of this, but the more time has passed since your breakup,
the less your chances of getting back together.
Now, that’s actually not 100% accurate.
For the first month or two after breaking up, time is often actually very HELPFUL to
your chances of getting back together… especially if you apply my No Contact strategy quickly
after the breakup.
30 days after breaking up, if you’ve applied No Contact, your odds of getting them back
are almost always BETTER than they were the first day after you broke up.
Time is good for the first while after a breakup, as it lets your ex forget about negative memories
and feelings, and allows them to experience the pain and loneliness of life without you
by their side.
Studies show that these feelings peak about 30 days after a breakup for the average relationship,
IF -- and this is a big IF -- you don’t make any mistakes during those 30 days, such
as begging or pleading or stalking your ex.
But after the first 1-2 months, time starts becoming your enemy.
After your ex starts to slowly learn to adjust to life on their own… when the smallest
little reminder can make them think of you and miss you like crazy….
Or especially when they start dating someone new… that’s when time becomes a bad thing
for your chances of getting them back.
If it’s been over a year since your breakup, your odds of getting them back are slim.
It’s time to start moving on and prepare for life without your ex.
Now, that’s not to say it’s impossible and exes never come back after a year apart…
I absolutely see that happen for my clients pretty regularly.
But more often, when the time since your breakup is measured in years instead of weeks or months,
it’s time to accept that your odds are very slim and you’ll likely have to move on.
What about if it’s been, say, 6 or 8 months since the breakup?
You may still have a chance, but that will depend on a) how long you and this ex were
together for, and how serious your relationship was; b) how messy your breakup was; and c)
how many mistakes you’ve made in those 6 or 8 months.
If you did everything correctly, you’ve been employing No Contact and really focusing
on your own life and living to the fullest with your ex out of the picture… you still
have a chance.
If your ex will barely speak to you after all that time, though, or you’ve made countless
mistakes and been blocked by your ex….
It’s almost definitely over.
Sorry.
In the first 6 months after a breakup, there’s usually still hope left… how likely it is
you’ll be able to actually win them back, though, depends on the details of your situation.
You know what the BEST way to figure out your odds?
Well, that brings me to #2…
#2 - What Did You Score On My Free Quiz?
If you haven’t already, go to BreakupBrad.com/Quiz, and answer a few simple questions… when
you submit your answers, you’ll be able to see a score out of 100 -- higher scores
mean you have a better chance of getting them back -- and you’ll also get a series of
personalized recommendations on how to maximize your odds based on your answers.
It takes about 5 minutes, it’s free, and it’s the most accurate assessment tool you’ll
find anywhere online.
I have compiled hundreds of studies and academic findings, as well as 13 years of breakup coaching
experience and data, to build my quiz and make it as accurate as possible.
Now, when you have your quiz score, you’ll be told what that score means for your chances
of getting your ex back… but in summary, if you score above 80 on the quiz, you will
probably be able to get your ex back.
Between 70 and 80, you still have a pretty decent chance.
Between 60 and 70, you are in a tough spot but there’s still a chance things might
turn around for you.
Below 60, it’s over, unfortunately… if your score is that low, like in the 50’s
or below, it’s almost certainly time to let go of your ex for good.
Again, take the quiz yourself any time for free at BreakupBrad.com/Quiz.
#3 - How Angry or Upset Is Your Ex?
No two breakups are identical.
Some end in a mutual agreement where you both decide it’s time to take some time apart.
Others end with a furious argument, nasty hateful insults, and lots of tears.
The factors that led to your breakup -- like, if you cheated on your ex with their best
friend, for example -- have an obvious impact on how likely it is you’ll ever be able
to start over in the future.
Generally speaking, the most extreme situations… where your ex told you never to speak to them
ever again, blocked your number, and threw all your belongings in a box at the curb when
they kicked you out… are the least likely to ever be reversible.
Now, that’s not to say this kind of anger won’t fade from your ex’s mind, and you
can even do things to help them let go of those negative feelings and bitterness…
but it’s harder than if you broke up more amicably.
Look back at your own action and behaviours before, during, and immediately after the
breakup.
Did you commit some seriously unforgivable offense, like cheating on your ex or stealing
from them?
(Yes, I actually had a coaching client last week who stole money from his ex’s wallet
multiple times.)
If so, did you apologize sincerely and make it clear to your ex that you understood your
mistakes and regret making them?
If you ended on good terms, and your ex appeared to be hurting just as much as you during the
first while after breaking up, you’re probably in a good position to get them back.
No guarantees, but it’s a much better situation to be in than if you slept with their best
friend.
And on a similar note, another factor that will determine whether your ex is gone for
good is…
#4 - Has Your Ex Appeared To Struggle With The Breakup, Or Sent You Mixed Signals?
Most of the time, a breakup hurts just as much for the one who initiates it as it does
for the person being dumped.
If your ex was obviously really hurting from the breakup… if they cried, told you they
were sorry that things had to end, or seemed to be uncertain about their decision… that’s
good news for your chances of getting them back.
If they’ve been consistently cold and distant, or haven’t really shown any emotional effects
from the breakup, then that’s not such a good sign.
It’s possible they’re just very good at keeping their emotions private -- in fact,
that’s actually probably the most likely reason… but it’s also possible that a
cold, distant ex who doesn’t appear to be affected by the breakup might really be 100%
confident in their decision and dead set on moving on.
It can be hard to tell which is the case for your ex, but you know their personality best…
and you can also take my quiz to help figure it out as well.
One clear sign that indicates you have a GOOD chance of getting them back is MIXED MESSAGES….
Or, in other words, the HOT AND COLD treatment.
I’ve made a video on this exact topic previously, which I’ll link to in the description below…
but, what I mean by “hot and cold” treatment is when your ex sometimes does or says things
that make you think they might want you back… only to send the complete opposite message
a few hours or days later.
For example, maybe they tell you how badly they miss you in a late night text message
on a Friday… but then on Sunday, they ignore your calls and texts completely and act like
you don’t exist.
Or maybe they’re flirting like crazy with you at work one day, then the next time you
have a shift together, they won’t even say hi or seem downright rude or angry at you.
These mixed message situations are almost always a positive sign for your odds of getting
a second chance.
Usually, this indicates they are still struggling internally with the decision to break up,
and it’s this kind of weakness and uncertainty that gives you a brilliant opportunity to
make your move and get them to come back to you begging for another chance.
Please watch my video linked in the description below on this topic, and also go to BreakupBrad.com
and watch my free full-length tutorial video to learn how to take advantage of this kind
of mixed messaging situation… it is, like I said, definitely a positive sign for your
chances.
#5 - How Many Mistakes Have You Made Since The Breakup?
This is another big factor in determining whether or not your ex is gone for good.
The more mistakes you’ve made -- and the more serious the nature of those mistakes
-- the more you’ve pushed your ex away and decreased your chances of getting them back.
When I say “mistakes”, I mean things like…
Begging and pleading your ex for a second chance
Lashing out at your ex in anger Allowing your ex to see your emotions and
heartache Trying to get revenge on your ex
Apologizing over and over again Pestering or nagging your ex repeatedly
Failing to apply a period of No Contact
Any and all of these actions are likely to reduce your ex’s attraction and paint you
in a negative light… so, the more mistakes like this you’ve committed since the breakup,
the less likely it is your ex is willing to get back together.
In many cases, you can commit some of these errors and still have a chance to win them
back… unfortunately, though, there’s also the possibility that you may have done so
much damage that your ex is gone for good.
Taking my free quiz will help you figure out how badly you’ve hurt your chances.
For more on how to UNDO the mistakes you’ve made since breaking up, please click the icon
in the top corner here and watch my previous video on this topic…
I’ ll also put a link in the description below.
If you’re guilty of committing any of the negative behaviours I mentioned earlier, you
should definitely watch it and find out how to reduce the damage you caused.
#6 - Is Your Ex Already WIth Someone New?
If your ex is with someone new already, it means 1 of 2 things… either:
They are in a rebound relationship that won’t last long.
If this is the case in your situation, you have a great chance of getting them back,
especially if it’s still in the first 4-6 week since the breakup.
Please watch my full video on how to steal back your ex from a rebound relationship by
clicking the little icon in the top corner here, or clicking the link to that video in
the description below.
Rebound relationships are often a GOOD thing for your chances of getting back together,
believe it or not, and I’ll explain why and how to take advantage of this situation
in that previous video.
OR…
It means they’re fully moved on and happily with someone new.
If they’ve been with someone for more than 6-8 weeks now, or if you can clearly tell
their relationship with this new person is serious… that’s a whole different story.
In those situations, your odds are almost zero, or at least they’re so slim that you
should definitely start moving on with life and assume they’re not coming back.
Basically, it all boils down to whether your ex is in a short-term fling intended to help
them cope with your breakup -- in other words, a rebound relationship that won’t last long
-- or whether this new person is a serious romance that’s going to get serious and
last a long time.
Never, EVER try to convince your ex to leave their new partner or new relationship.
Don’t try to sabotage it, lash out at your ex or their new partner, or really even mention
the relationship to your ex at all.
The best way to handle an ex who is already dating someone new is to take the “high
road” and act like you don’t care… or better yet, act like you’re happy for them.
Anything you try to do to break up your ex and this new person will definitely cause
permanent damage to your chances of ever getting back together.
#7 - Do YOU Want Your Ex Back?
Lastly, a quick final reminder… your ex ISN’T the only person on earth that you’re
compatible with.
Don’t get me wrong -- I think there are many, many times when you SHOULD try to save
your relationship and start over with your ex -- and for many of you watching, that’s
probably the right way forward.
But be sure to think this over.
Will things be different next time around, if you do get back together?
Is there a long-term, realistic future for you together…?
And most importantly… when you’re in those moments when your heart is aching and you
miss your ex like mad, ask yourself: do I miss MY EX specifically, or do I miss being
in a relationship and having someone to share my life with?
If it’s definitely your ex that you miss -- and not just having a loving partner and
a committed relationship -- then you should definitely keep fighting for another chance
with them.
On the other hand, maybe some of you watching will realize that your ex wasn’t actually
the perfect match for you in the first place… and that you could end up just as happy in
the long term by finding someone new to replace them.
It’s up to you to decide, and I won’t try to tell you which is the right path forward…
but I will be there to help you if you need a second opinion or some guidance from an
experienced coach.
To work with me 1-on-1, visit BreakupBrad.com/Coaching and sign up now to get started.
Whatever you decide, folks, I wish you the VERY best of luck…
I hope you quickly find happiness, whether that means getting your ex back into your
arms again, or finding someone new who makes you just as happy as your ex did.
Thanks for watching, don’t forget to leave your questions in the comments below, and
take my free quiz right now at BreakupBrad.com/Quiz… see you again soon!