- PMS times a million.
I'm Augusta and I have something called PMDD.
Premenstrual dysphoric disorder, or PMDD,
is an extreme form of PMS that includes
severe physical and behavioral symptoms.
When I first realized that I had it as a teenager,
I was just convinced that I was
bipolar or really depressed.
I felt I was intangible because I couldn't put myself
in one box, one way or another.
I was captain of cheerleading, I was in honors classes,
I was in theater, I was in all these things.
And it's like, all happy all the time!
At home, I was like, wow I'm extremely depressed.
In this video, you're gonna see that I'm really happy
and really upbeat and that's because I'm not in
the part of my cycle where PMDD is affecting me.
If we were filming this when I was in my PMDD cycle,
I guarantee you it would be a different version of myself.
It's not the happy me, it's like the me
that doesn't have energy or is just feeling
really depressed and sad, and low.
The big thing is that PMDD, when it hits,
it's not something that you can really see,
and it's not something that's immediately perceptible.
That's why people don't know that other people have it
or know that they have it.
But it is this, like, bit of a conflict inside of myself.
If you don't know what PMDD is, picture PMS times a million.
Extreme emotional and physical highs and lows.
I would laugh so hard that I would actually start crying
and then I would just really sad about,
I don't know, I just felt sadness and hopelessness,
really deep within me for no apparent reason,
it was just like a feeling that overcame me.
The physical part of it is that
because your hormones are changing
at whatever time, it gets triggered
For me it's like my boobs are really sore
for like three weeks before my period
which, if you do math, is 75% of the month.
I would get really bad migraines,
like I started tracking it and I would get migraines
like 12 days before my period every single cycle.
So, PMDD for me is really extreme highs and lows,
or exaggerated emotions and physical feelings,
and things, before your period.
So, when I was 15 I had my periods for about 3 years,
and I started at that point getting very sad,
like two weeks before my period.
And then one day on TV I saw a commercial for Yaz,
which was branded as the PMDD birth control.
They started listing out the symptoms and it was like,
depression, sadness, extreme highs and lows,
breast tenderness, migraines, like all of these things,
and I was like it's me, it's me,
they're talking to me, I need this thing!
So, I went with my Mom to my gynecologist,
we went and I told her all of my symptoms
and she was like, yeah, you have PMDD
and if Yaz is what you wanna be taking,
we can get you on that.
So, I went on it, I was on it for like four years,
and it was great for my PMDD but it was really terrible
in some other physical aspects,
so I wound up having to get off of it,
and I can't be on hormonal birth control at all.
Because of that, I've had to figure out how
to deal with PMDD on an extremely natural level.
So, when I'm experiencing PMDD
I'm like in the zone of PMDD.
The things that can throw me off are
so minuscule-sounding but you would
think that my entire world was shattered.
If someone sends me an email at work, that's like,
hey, you did something wrong, can you fix it,
it's, like, the most polite email, I'm like
can you believe what they're sending me!
I need to quit this job, I need to go
move to some cabin in the woods!
I'm never looking at email again!
It's like you would that they emailed that I was
getting fired and I was upset about that.
I have to ask myself, like, okay, if this were a week ago
is this how you would respond to this thing?
Or, like, if this was two weeks from now,
is this how you would react to this email?
So, I have to sit back and say to myself,
girl, it's not you talking, it's the PMDD monster
and that person is who's responding.
And sometimes it's the same thing and I know what it is,
like, if the email thing at work, I'm like okay,
I feel like I'm gonna hate everyone this week,
like, whatever.
Other things, like getting tickled, I'm like,
couldn't have spotted that.
It's not easy to necessarily recognize PMDD in someone
and sometimes it's honestly hard
to recognize it in yourself.
For me, the thing that people probably take for granted
is they kind of just roll with the punches no matter what
and I feel like I need to plan ahead for every single thing,
which is exhausting and takes a lot more
time and energy out of my day.
For me, I'm like, okay it's the 17th of the month,
which means I'm gonna be crabby for about two weeks now.
As an adult I've really learned
how to roll with the punches of my PMDD.
For example, I know that in the moment and in my emotions
I'm like, I don't wanna get out of bed,
I don't even wanna shower today,
I don't wanna do anything, I don't wanna see anyone,
or talk to anyone, and I know that the thing that
actually gets me out of it is distracting
myself with social situations.
The best thing that I can do is go be with people.
I know that what I eat and how much I exercise
actually really helps it.
So, I'm really conscious to take care of myself
on a really regular basis because it honestly
is, like, the only medicine that has been able to work
and not give me negative side effects as well.
If you think you have PMDD after watching this video
I'd say first of all, @ me, because we talk about it.
Second, talk to your parent or guardian,
or somebody in your life who you trust,
who you can tell about your symptoms
and maybe get an appointment with a doctor or gynecologist.
Know that you can figure out what works for you
and what doesn't work for you,
and figure out how to roll with the punches.
It's not gonna be this, like, life sentence of terribleness.
You can figure out how to, kind of, make it work for you.
(gentle music)
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