- Anything we make really important,
what we do is we give that a lot of energy,
and what the universe does is the Law of Balance
in our reality, is that, that energy must be mitigated.
That energy must be relieved
because there's excess energy there.
So what happens is anything we really, really want,
we resist and we do not allow into our life.
Anytime we put someone on a pedestal,
what we are doing is we're putting them above ourselves
and then what happens is it creates resistance
because it's giving something more energy
and more importance than it actually has.
Everything in reality is neutral.
This is why there may be somebody
that you're maybe not attracted to.
And it's very easy for you to walk into them and talk
but then there's somebody over there that you actually,
in your mind you begin to glorify.
You put them on a pedestal and you'd go over to them.
You stifled and you kind of stuttered.
The reason being is because there's more resistance infused
into the second scenario
because there's more importance infused there.
And that importance is felt at an energetic level.
So that's why they say, if you treat someone
like a celebrity, they will treat you like a fan.
It's literally that energy dynamic of importance
and anything we make very important, we put on a pedestal
and we immediately create resistance around it.
Now, when it comes to dating
and then when it comes to attracting love,
this is a very important part to understand
because many people may have a certain level
of codependency tendencies.
They may feel very needy when they start to date
or they may feel even very needy
in just the dating stage
of talking to either other men or women.
The key to this is becoming aware
of where that's coming from.
Now, at talking about this
in the form of the importance, here's what happens.
When we have a lower sense of self-worth.
What we do is we then believe we are smaller
than we actually are.
So on the other side of that importance
it's like an unimportance,
almost where we, we're giving it a lack.
It's almost an increased importance on the negative side.
We're saying, "I'm not worthy, I'm not enough."
So what we do is we look
to the outside and we put people on a higher pedestal.
What that then does is that creates the resistance
but where that's coming from is it's coming
from a level of unworthiness.
We believe we're not worthy and because we're not worthy,
we're then looking to fulfill our sense
of worthiness through getting the validation
of somebody that's on a pedestal.
So the key to this, of decreasing
importance is first off, realizing your own
sense of self-worth, that's the first step
to this process.
Become aware of your own sense of self-worth.
And as you start to become aware of that
you can then see that you are then equal to that,
to the person that you were putting on a pedestal.
So in energy dynamics and in love
and attracting and even dating, the key is to come
at it from a frame that I'm already whole and complete.
And a lot of times this also stems from childhood trauma
because when we had something that happened
when we were a kid, we started to feel shame
or we've started to feel like we're not worthy.
And that shame says, "There's something wrong with me
and because there's something wrong with me
then I'm not worthy.
And I will then tolerate or only be in certain type
of relationships that reflect that belief back
because that belief is on autopilot."
So realize that when it comes to importance
when it comes to love, this is
about realizing that first off, your own sense of self-worth
which means that maybe what you do is you start really going
after what you're passionate about, because you're worth it.
You start drawing boundaries
from people draining your energy, because you're worth it.
You start doing more activities of self-love.
You start taking care of yourself more
rather than people pleasing other people,
realizing you were people pleasing
because you were putting them on a pedestal
giving them more importance than yourself.
And then it's hard to say no.
So the first thing is about making
and realizing your own sense of self-love,
your own sense of self-worth
and to stop abandoning yourself for other.
That's a lot of times what's happens
in this whole importance and excessive energy dynamic.
Anything we make important
we energetically separate ourselves from it.
So first off, realizing your own frame of reality.
When I was in dating
when I was working nine to five jobs, I'd always
attract women that were also working nine to five jobs
they hated because you attract what you are.
If you want to attract something new
and you want to attract someone
that's going to be an equal match to your vibe.
Be the most authentic vibe you can be,
be going after your purpose or your passion
or be living in alignment with your true values.
That's another thing when it comes to love,
many people don't know what their value system is.
They say, "I want a woman that's like this,
this or this or I want a man that's this, this or this."
But the thing is, is those three values,
are you living by those three values?
Because if you're not living by it
then you're not going to attract somebody that also has it.
You see?
So this is about really the alignment to yourself,
your alignment to yourself and your own principles
because you get that what you are.
I now, I attract women now that are doing what
they love, or at least in their purpose.
You know, and it's because I'm doing what I love.
You know, it's an interesting energy dynamic difference.
So that's part of it.
Now, the second thing is simply start to take people
off of the pedestals
and stop making things more important than they are.
If you believe you're unworthy
or you believe that love isn't going to complete you
then that things on a pedestal, it's not going to.
There's a story.
Many times that'll keep similar energy dynamics
at place that were there during childhood
because we haven't healed our childhood yet.
We haven't become at peace
with our childhood and accepted it.
You know, a big part of this, for me, was realizing
that I was, I've been replaying similar energy dynamics
between me and my parents growing up.
I felt shame.
I felt like there was something wrong
with me when the attention shifted in my family,
when my brother was born, when I was three,
and then also the emotional availability
'cause my mom was going through a lot of stuff,
it's not her fault
but her dad passed away when I was one.
And ever since then, I've been attracting women
into my life that I subconsciously try to fix,
because if I can fix them, then maybe they're going
to love me.
And then I put them on a pedestal
and I feel this like unhealthy attachment style.
And what I've realized is that I can
stop identifying with that shame of thinking
there's something wrong with me.
There's nothing wrong with me.
And at the same time, realizing
that it's not my job to fix.
Realizing that they're doing the best they can
with where they are but I don't have to continue
to try to think that this is about me,
that I'm unworthy because someone else feels
like there's stuff going on in their life.
And I've attracted women that also have stuff going
on in their life.
And I realized, wait, this isn't about me.
It's not like if I get you, then I'm worthy.
I'm already worthy, I already,
and then from there, my standards raised, I'm like
not like I'm, I'm like, you know, looking down on people
but my standard raised of my own sense of self-love.
This is what I really want.
This is how I really want to be treated.
This is the energy dynamics that I really prefer.
So in a way it's increased my sense of self-worth.
So when it comes to this process, realize
that you and your reality are getting a direct reflection
of what you believe you deserve.
And if you have some type of shame or some type
of unworthiness, then you're probably putting up with more
than anyone that feels secure in love would, so the key
to this is you becoming aware of that and then
not giving anything excess importance, which means excess
meaning, really, it's giving it more meaning than yourself.
And when you do that
that's when the energy dynamics come at play.
If you put someone on a pedestal,
I've had it before where I started dating someone
I started putting them on a pedestal and then I stopped.
And then the attraction goes the other way
because they can feel that energy off of you.
And if you're giving them too much importance
too much validation or becoming needy,
it repels them,
'cause that's how the energy works.
So take people off of a pedestal
by becoming aware of your own sense of self-worth.
And that's when you will more so align
with love in an easy way.
If being in a loving relationship is on a pedestal
and it would be amazing, then it's not equal to your reality
it must be natural for you to experience that.
It's almost like, well, I love myself.
So of course, someone else is going to love me.
It is natural for you to experience your goals
and you can apply this towards any area of your life.
If you say, "Once I make this kind of money
it's going to feel amazing,"
and it's on this big pedestal,
then it's creating excess importance to it.
And it's resistance that is infused
and it's going to prolong the process.
So a desire does not get results.
Desire, I really, really want says I really, really lack.
The only time desire does get results is
when desire is translated
and dissipated through action, the importance
the excessive importance is dissipated through action.
And that action then, 'cause then people take action.
Maybe it's out of neediness
but then eventually that gets results.
But just wanting something does not get results.
And in the same way, realize that it must be natural
for your identity to be experiencing love
because you're already loving yourself.
You already have a strong sense
of self, you're in your own frame of reality.
You're leading in your life.
You realize that this really is not
about the conditioning of Disney movies, of believing
that you're not worthy or whole and complete already.
You are, you are, you don't have to believe those beliefs.
You can realize that what are your stories about love?
What are your stories about self?
What are your stories about life?
Which means what are your beliefs?
And then what you do is you start putting the awareness more
within your own body.
And as you do, you begin to decrease the level
of importance that you are giving to things like this.
So in general, this is the power of that.
And there is a meditation that helps you
feel the insight of that self-love,
there are thousands of people
that have attracted love through this meditation
through listening to it for 21 days, read the comments
from thousands of people that will increase your belief
that it can work for you too
and then commit to it for 21 days.
You'll see that below.
It's the most popular video on my YouTube channel.
It's got over 4 million views now
it's on attracting love in a relationship.
And it, all it is, is you feeling that love on the inside.
It's natural for you.
It's easy, and then you see an equal reflection
in your life begin to establish itself.
So with that being said, like this video,
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as always, much love,
peace, much love and namaste.