You've been doing your show,
and so I know you're tired, so I'll let you go.
This is fun.
You're sticking with the name Phil in the Blanks.
You're sticking with that.
Is the person who came up with that title
in this room right now with us?
No. No.
That was my son, Jordan.
Oh, that's right, your son,
Jordan, came up with this.
So, you wanna finish this ridiculing my children.
Is that what you're saying?
Just Jordan.
Just that one child.
You're just gonna ridicule that one child.
I'm not gonna attack all your children.
Only Jordan came up with this ridiculous title.
Just him.
(Jimmy laughs)
I don't know.
You like this title.
No, I don't like the title.
Well, rename it.
Well, I came up with a lot of suggestions,
and you ignored them.
They were terrible!
Win, Lose, or McGraw?
Oh, McGraw Talk.
Like raw, but you make the words raw red.
Okay? Yeah.
You know what I'm saying? Raw McGraw?
Or what about just the Dr. Phil Podcast?
Well--
Dr. Phil in Time.
How about that?
Lassie could figure out the Dr. Phil Podcast.
What is that?
How about...
What's your middle name?
Calvin.
Oh really?
Yeah, what's yours?
Christian.
Don't make fun of Jesus. Oh really?
You know, you can't attack Christian.
I know that.
Calvin. Christian.
Really, Calvin?
Yeah.
All right. Calvin's in the Bible.
You can't pick on that.
Calvin's in the comics.
Calvin is not in--
Calvin and Hobbes.
Yeah, right.
Calvin's in the Bible?
Well, Christian is in the Bible.
It's the main guy.
Number one.
Is there a book of Christian?
Kind of. (laughs)
Yeah.
More or less.
Yeah, more or less.
Anyway, I'm just saying if you want,
I will submit another list of titles,
but Phil in the Blanks is ridiculous.
You just don't like it.
I don't like it, no.
So, you hate it enough that you won't listen?
No, I'm not saying I'm...
It's a ridiculous title for a podcast.
You're making a mockery of the podcast industry.
Phil in the Blanks.
Am I the blank?
Like, what does that mean?
I'm filling in the blanks about your life.
Oh.
You have no idea what I'm gonna say about you
when you leave.
Oh, well, why didn't you say that at the beginning?
Now, it makes sense.
See?
People think they know you
because you come out in the suit every day.
You got a social mass.
So, you put this suit on, you come out there
and say, hey, see, look at me, I'm in a suit.
I'm credible, so you should believe the stuff I say.
You know what?
I'm a big enough man to apologize to Jordan
now that I understand that there is,
actually, an idea behind this ridiculous pun title.
So, you don't like any of my titles.
You make fun of my show titles.
You make fun of my podcast titles.
It's your only flaw, really.
You really need to work on the titles.
No, you know what?
The show titles are great; they're just funny.
Well, they're descriptive.
Like--
I keep telling people
you need to make these titles less than a paragraph.
Yeah, they are long.
They are long.
But, in fairness to them, there are a lot of shows.
So, you gotta come up with something.
Yeah. Yeah.
But they could just say 2009 42.
They could just call it that.
Yeah, that's no fun, though.
No, that's no fun. It's better to say
my teenager's having sex with her astrologer.
Something like that.
I've got one tomorrow that my father was killed
by a police sniper and our family is falling apart.
It's very specific.
That's very specific.
He was robbing a bank, a police sniper killed him,
and now the family's all in turmoil.
Well, that's a horrible story.
That really happened.
I mean, yeah.
I mean, I believe it, sure.
Yeah, they got the video footage.
They were watching live on television
when a police sniper shot him.
Oh boy.
Wow.
Isn't that bad?
They were teenagers.
They're watching this.
Oh, there's dad.
Oh.
Yeah, that's no good.
Yeah.
I think I have Angela Bassett on.
(Jimmy and Phil laugh)
Yeah.
I think I win.
Yeah.
Well, someone try to fill in the blanks for them
on what you tell yourselves now.
Yeah.