-How is everything, by the way, with the quarantine?
Are you okay?
-You know, I got this -- as soon as it happened,
I bought this tiny little cabin up in Montana,
and you know, it keeps me way far away from anybody.
I don't see a human soul, really, up here.
It's fantastic.
I bought it from a guy named Kaczynski.
It was kind of a mess when I got it, but...
No Wi-Fi or cable.
It's like the guy hated technology.
-Oh, my gosh.
Did you get it fairly cheap, or is it...?
-Yes, I did. Yes, I did.
But I'm getting fat. That's the problem.
Are you getting fat during this COVID thing?
I'm getting a little fat.
My head never gains weight,
which is fantastic for this Zoom medium.
-Yeah. -But, yeah, down here,
I'm starting to, like -- I'm ordering some of those
rocking chairs they sell outside of Cracker Barrel restaurants.
You know, the extra wide ones.
-[ Laughs ]
-They're almost comedy ones. You go, "who would sit in that"
-For that big, wide all-American ass.
You know? It's great.
And I just go, "More biscuits! More biscuits!"
I love that place. -More biscuits.
I love Cracker Barrel restaurant, man.
It's the greatest. -"More Biscuits" is the sequel
to "Memoirs and Misinformation." -"More Biscuits."
That's right. -"More Biscuits" is the sequel.
Hey, by the way, we were talking about some of the celebs
that you bring up in the book. -Yeah.
-Did you get any -- Anyone getting mad at you
for bringing -- You know, like --
-No, I think they're reacting pretty well.
Like, pretty much like this, I think.
"Huh?!" -[ Laughing ]
-"What the hell is this?! Wha-- What?!
Oh! Oh!
What did he -- [ Gasps ]
Oh! Oh!
Why, I oughta!" -[ Laughing ]
There's a lot of that going on. -Uh-huh.
-Except for Gary Busey, who's going like this --
"If you wear it on your head when you're hang-gliding,
it'll blow your mind open like a lobster dinner."
-The audiobook here is done by Jeff Daniels,
who, obviously... -Yes.
-...you worked with, "Dumb and Dumber."
And I love Jeff Daniels. He's an amazing actor.
His quote -- [ Laughs ] He was quoted as saying,
"I had no idea Jim knew so many big words."
-Yeah, I heard about that. To that I say,
Pneumonoultramicroscopic- silicovolcanokoniosis.
Do you know what that word is?
-Pwkk! No.
-Well, maybe you should call Jeff and find out if he knows.
-I just know that I'm not gonna play Scrabble with you.
-It's the biggest word humanity has ever produced,
and I know it.
-[ Laughs ] Oh, my God!
-That's all I'm saying.
-You don't have to be so cocky about it.
-I feel like I had to defend myself there.
-I wasn't attacking. -That's right.
A lot of people don't know that I've reached my apotheosis.
-[ Laughs ]
Jim, what do you hope readers take away from the book?
-Gosh, uh, I hope they...
they, uh, have a great, great...
great time, honestly.
I want them to have a good time.
I want them to be so struck by this strangeness
and the invention of this book that they rip their nipples off
and run into the streets, screaming my name.
-[ Laughs ]
-And then, when they get hit by the car, and they lay there,
they can't even remember their own name,
and that's really all I'm after.
-You're not asking much.
-I want us all to be nameless, one thing, joined in alchemy.
-Wow.
-I will say, the last page, which I won't --
[ Laughing ]
The last page -- -God, he's really gotten
out of control with this. -No, no.
I think you're not even close to where you belong yet.
-It's fantastic. And you know what?
It is like a lobster dinner. It really is.
'Cause once you think you're full and you've eaten it all,
you'll realize there's meat in the legs!
-[ Laughing ] -There's meat in the legs.
And the fantasy continues. [ Both laugh ]
-How'd you come up with the cover, by the way?
-Oh, the cover. The cover is a wild story.
That cover is actually my face
after being told that I have 10 minutes to live.
And that's for real.
That was a missile test -- Sorry. Not a missile test.
A fake missile alert in Hawaii. -Yes.
-I was there. -No!
-I was writing. My assistant, Linda, called me.
She was crying. She said, "We have 10 minutes left."
And I said, "What do you mean."
She said, "The missiles are coming from North Korea."
-I remember this. They sent out
an emergency text to everybody.
-It was completely real to us.
And I went -- You know, my brain started winding.
And I tried to get off the island.
And my daughter -- I couldn't get off the island.
And then, the question was posed,
"Should we all try to get together."
I said, "I don't want to die in my car."
And we had to say goodbye.
And I sat on the lanai and looked out at the ocean,
and at that point, I started going,
"Okay. Well, what can I do with this last moment of time?"
And I just decided to go through a list of gratitudes,
and honest to God, I just could not stop thinking
of wonderful things that have happened to me
and blessings that I've had, so it was lovely.
It was lovely. And I got to a point of grace
with about two minutes to spare when I found out
it wasn't actually happening.
And all I was planning to do was close my eyes an be thankful,
'cause it's been a good ride.
-What did you do when you found out
that it was a fake missile test?
-Then I got pissed off, and heads rolled.
[ Both laugh ]
-"I had a kegger, dude!"
-[ Laughing ] Exactly!
Yeah. "I smoked a tree!"
-[ Laughing ]
It is so creative. It's so fun.
You re-read pages over.
I laughed -- -And there's meat in the legs!
-And there is meat in the legs.
Ladies and gentlemen, that is the one and only Jim Carrey.
Thank you so much for coming on our show.
I really appreciate it, buddy. -So great to see you, man.
-So great to see you. -And way to go on all of this
and keeping it alive and keeping the energy flowing
and making people happy. Congratulations.
-Thank you, buddy. Thank you so much.