All right.
Well, like I say, happy Mother's Day to my own mother back
in Houston, Texas--
Nita.
Happy Mother's Day, sweetheart.
She's my rock.
That's so sweet.
That's for sure.
I'm so glad you're here.
Look at all the women coming back from the bathroom.
You have--
This is for real.
Oh yeah.
You have twins.
How old are your twins now?
They're 2 and 1/2.
2 and 1/2.
And then, you brought something, actually,
that they will appreciate very much.
Yes, my wife is involved with a baby products
line called UpSpring Baby.
And among the products is--
it's called Shrinkx, which is a belt that you
can wear because your body emits a hormone when you're pregnant.
And it makes everything really soft and your bones spread.
Well, that's good.
That's convenient.
This helps get everything back in line.
In fact, I'm wearing it now, so--
[APPLAUSE]
And they're getting that?
Everybody's getting one.
That's great.
[CHEERING]
So you put it on--
Well, I'll tell ya.
It really does work because it holds in, I guess,
your hips and different things.
Yeah--
But it works because--
--during the first eight weeks after your--
Take a look at him.
It must work.
Yeah.
Look at that.
[CHEERING]
Look at that.
I didn't know they were watching.
Yeah.
So you were in Hawaii, right?
Yes, I was doing a surf movie over there, the Bethany
Hamilton story.
She had her arm taken off by a shark when she was 13.
And she came back.
It's a really inspirational story.
Amazing story.
Yeah, she was on the show after that happened.
Yeah, incredible.
And she still surfs.
Incredible girl.
She still surfs like a pro.
How do you have balance like that?
She uses a handle on her surfboard.
Does she?
Yeah, I went out surfing with her,
and you can't keep up with her paddling, which
is kind of pathetic on my part.
Right.
But it was a lot of fun.
I mean, you got to do a movie in Hawaii.
And I really fell in love with surfing.
And it's great.
You're so versatile because you're funny and you get
to-- well, let's talk about this movie because you have that
Clinton--
did you do an impression of Clinton
before you got this movie?
Eh, not really because I didn't think much about it.
I knew him back in the '90s.
I spent a weekend in the White House with him
and kind of got to know him.
And then, I got this film, and it was really daunting.
It was just like, I didn't see myself doing it.
And I almost said no to it because I was afraid of it.
Yeah, it's a lot to take on.
Yeah, I think you should do the things
you're most afraid to do.
I just went ahead.
You really did capture his voice and his mannerisms.
And I thought Hope Davis did a great job as Hillary.
A fantastic job.
But it's written--
Peter Morgan, who wrote Frost/Nixon and The Queen.
And so it shows him and everybody
involved in the film in a very human way, I thought.
And it's the first time, I think, he's been done,
to my knowledge, been done seriously.
It'll be interesting to see what they--
do you know how they feel about it, the Clintons?
I don't know.
No, I don't.
I didn't call him on it.
Right, see if you hang out with him again after this.
Yeah, we'll see.
Yeah.
So the last time-- the last few times you were here,
we-- the first time I'm sure everyone saw (NEW YORK ACCENT)
"Dennis Quaid is here" in the gift shop.
And then, since then, we did the delivery food
in the dressing room, which was hysterical.
We actually have another task.
We have called, like, AAA.
Is that right?
And we are pretending that Dennis' car has broken down.
We'll have hidden cameras out there.
And again, I'll tell Dennis to say things
to this poor guy that's going to show up.
And but I want to mention, though,
The Special Relationship airs May 29 at 9:00 on HBO,
before I forget.
We'll be back.
All right, well, Dennis is outside.
He's waiting.
We put hidden cameras by a car that won't start.
He's got an earpiece, and he has to say
whatever I tell him to say.
Let's go see where Dennis is.
If you can hear me, cough into your hand.
[COUGHS]
All right, great.
All right, so we've called AAA.
The guy should be pulling up right now.
Go ahead.
Let's walk outside, Dennis.
All right.
And oh, he's there.
OK, look, Dennis, when you go out,
say, I got to be honest with you, man, I'm Dennis Quaid.
[SIGH] Hey.
Hey, I got to be honest with you, man.
All right.
I'm Dennis Quaid.
OK.
I was in The Rookie.
Yeah, I was in The Rookie.
I was in Dragonheart.
Dragonheart.
Wyatt Earp.
Yeah, Alamo.
I know you.
Alamo.
I know you.
Dennis Quaid needs a jump.
[CHUCKLING]
Dennis Quaid needs a jump.
I'll try my best.
OK.
All right?
On the way over, it was making this funny noise-- vrepuka,
vrepuka, vrepuka.
On the way over, it was making this funny noise, like, repuka,
repuka.
Ta-king, ta-king, ta-king, ta-king.
And I-- ta-ping, ta-ping, (SPITTING) ta-ping.
And then, poopie, poopie, poopie.
Poopie, poopie, poopie, poopie, poopie-- like that.
And then, like a re-tu, re-tu.
And then, when I'd stop, it'd go-- (ROLLING R's) re-tu,
re-tu, re-tu.
I don't get it.
Oh, Dennis Quaid likes to drive.
Make vroom-vroom noises.
[LOUD SIGH] Dennis Quaid likes to drive.
[IMITATES ENGINE REV]
I like to rev it up real hard.
Vroom.
I like to rev it up really hard.
[AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]
What's your name?
RB.
What?
Ramin.
That's my nephew's name.
Ramin?
Yes.
That's my nephew's name.
Really?
[LAUGHS]
Play peekaboo with him.
He loves to play peekaboo.
Yeah.
Peekaboo.
Keep doing peekaboo.
Keep doing it.
Peekaboo.
Oh, my nephew--
Peekaboo.
I thought you'd like it.
Oh, I thought you'd like it.
My nephew loves peekaboo, so--
Oh, he's two.
Two?
Yeah, I thought you'd like it.
My nephew-- he loves peekaboo.
Ha ha.
Hug your-- hug your-- hug your car.
I love it, too.
OK, that's what it is.
Your battery is gone.
Hug your car and say, don't die on me, man.
Don't die on me.
Because of these things, OK?
Yeah, don't--
What is the problem.
Don't die on me, man.
Time to spend some money.
I love you, car.
I love you, Mercedes.
Kiss it.
So you want me to start the car for you?
Why me, God?
Start crying, why me, God?
Why me, God?
Louder.
Scream it in the air with your fists in the air.
Put your fists in the air.
(SCREAMING) Why me, God?
I made out with Martha Stewart in this back seat.
[SIGH] You know, I made out with Martha Stewart
in this back seat.
Yeah.
Jealous, huh?
Crazy.
Would you open my trunk for me?
Hey--
Let me fix the problem for you.
Oh, hey, I got to get something out of the trunk.
I don't even know if it'll open.
Can you help me?
I'll open it for you.
Of course I can open.
Open up.
Have him open the trunk, Dennis.
Go ahead, open it up.
No, he needs to-- please open the trunk.
No, no, no, tell him.
With the key.
No, we need--
No, it doesn't work.
Can you help me?
Now it works.
No, just come here.
It still won't go.
Just open it.
[MUFFLED SCREAM]
Oh, you didn't see anything.
Close it.
You didn't see anything, did you?
[CHUCKLE]
[CLAP]
You didn't see anything.
You know what?
I'm going to skip home like a pretty pony.
Skip away.
Skip away like a pretty pony.
[FLAPS LIPS]
Skip away.
Leave him.
Skip away like a pretty pony.
And make neigh, neigh.
[NEIGHS]
Keep going, Dennis.
Horsey lost his shoe.
Keep going.
Horsey lost his shoe.
[SIGH]
[CHUCKLE]
[LAUGHS]
All right, Dennis-- just keep going, Dennis,
because we're done.
Keep going.
All right.
Well, I love a hidden camera.
That guy-- he's a good sport.
Well, I love a hidden camera.
And hopefully, you'll all get babies that sleep.
But either way, you're going to need one of these.
Safety 1st makes a new prism color
video monitor that features clear
digital picture and the ability to zoom in and out.
Even tells you the temperature of your baby's room.
You're all getting one.
[CHEERING]
[MUSIC PLAYING]