You know what a Baby-gro is, don't you?
Well, there's adult ones, and one guy, he used to, like,
book me to go to his, have his bath, put him in his Baby-gro,
put him to bed and read him his story.
That was it.
Lock his door and post his key.
Why would anybody want that?
You tell me.
Why would anyone want you to shit on them?
But they do.
SHE KNOCKS ON DOOR
I've missed you so much.
I just needed seven quid.
I am not giving you money for drugs.
Then...I'm just going to have to do what I do.
I'm not here when you get back, you know? I've gone.
I love him, but he just... He's not bothered, is he?
There's a load of Brazilian lasses come over now.
Getting a load of us here.
I'm not dropping the price.
If all other girls all start undercutting people,
the guys won't go near the other people.
They're just going to go keep picking up the scruffy fuckers.
Cos anyone will do owt for a bit cheap, won't they?
Anybody should know that who knows me, that I'm competitive.
Even on the beat.
If I think there's competition and there's a girl prettier than me,
I'll move her on.
You just, like... You'll have your usual spot,
keep going there the same time,
and then all the girls realise that's where you are.
And then the punters get to know that, and then the girls...
Like, you each make your own spot.
And if other people go there, you up and say, "Oi, jog on.
"This is mine."
I've had many fights over that.
Upon release from prison, those very first few weeks
are going to be the time you're most in need of support,
cos, you know, you get released from the gates,
it's like, right, what the fuck shall I do now?
You know, you need... In jail,
it's easy to get off drugs and live cos you've got structure,
you're doing this at this time, you've got stuff to do.
I love that, I love...
That's one thing I love about jail, is structure.
So, how would you describe your relationship, then?
Erm...intense.
But it's all right. I'm used to intense.
Yeah, she's a funny character. She makes me laugh.
I've never met someone with so much confidence.
I like jail. It's like holiday camp at Butlin's. You know?
Because you get woke up at, like, seven o'clock on a morning,
and you go to work, you come back,
you know, you have your dinner,
and then you're behind your door for an hour, two hour,
do you know what I mean?
Then you go back to work.
And then you're at work until 4.30, 5.00.
It's routine.
Normal day-to-day life, which I don't have.
My new boyfriend has been looking after me.
SHE COUGHS Excuse me.
SHE SPITS Sorry.
Yeah, my new boyfriend has been looking after me,
cos he don't like me working.
Which...has been all right. Been cush.
The only downside to it, though, is I've been sexually frustrated,
do you know what I mean?
He's not putting out.
So... SHE LAUGHS
..I'm trying to manage, you know?
I've been doing it since I was 16.
I got abused when I was a kid,
ran away from home a week before my 16th birthday.
Met this guy, he put me on the beat.
It's like, that's life, that's what it's about sort of thing,
and that's what I used to think.
It's like I never had the choice to go with a lad and lose my virginity.
I had that took.
I didn't have the choices that every young person should have -
I never had that.
Every night before I go out, I've got ready, and I'm at the doorstep,
and I've got to give him five kisses and tell him I love him.
Then another five kisses and tell him I love him.
And then another five and tell him I love him,
and to lock the door.
And he's got to say, "Be careful. Good luck.
"I hope you walk into one straightaway,"
or I can't do it.
The other girls, they wear make-up and high heels and...
But you get your money anyway.
It doesn't matter what you wear, if you go out in little shorts,
if you go out in trackie bottoms. I've went out in trackie bottoms,
I've been out in pyjamas and still got it.
There was this one guy, he asked me
if I'd put my whole hand up his arse,
and I told him to jog on.
Like, fuck off. No. No, no, no.
If I can't put a johnny on it or protect myself,
then, no, I'm not doing it.
So then he come back about four weeks later with a cucumber,
and it was like that long and it was like that fat.
And he put a johnny on it,
and he said, "I want you to put it up my arse."
So I said, "All right, then." And I got 50 quid for it, though.
So I just put the end bit up and he's going,
"No, I want you to ram it up, all the way."
And he took the whole cucumber.
And then I said to him, "Do you want me to throw it?"
And he put it in his shopping bag
and said no, he was taking it home to his wife for tea.
So his wife had had a cucumber for her tea that had been up his arse.
I've got a leg ulcer.
It's, like, about two inches,
about an inch and a half big by the same wide.
But it's quite deep.
It's about a centimetre deep, two centimetres deep.
Initially, I went into hospital with my pneumonia,
and I had just a little pinprick blood blister on my leg -
that's all it was, literally.
And then one night, that popped,
and it obviously got a bit of blood on the bed,
so they put a dressing on it.
And obviously since the dressing has been on it,
it's just grown into that.
I have not been down working on the beat as much recently,
because my legs have been really sore.
I've been down, what, about two or three times, I think.
But I've not stayed out for long
because obviously it hurts.
I've just got a letter from my mum, yeah.
She's just saying she was really glad we could spend time together.
"I really hope you can get your programme sorted for methadone.
"If you do want to get away from Leeds, which is what we want,
"then, just call us. You've got our numbers.
"Everybody sends all their love.
"Please write back to me, you have the stamped addressed envelope.
"When you've got yourself together,
"there is a place here for you to get better.
"Think about it, sunshine and fresh air,
"sea to swim in and the animals to help me with.
"Lots of love, Mum."
Getting back in touch with my mum and stuff,
it's obviously made me realise that there is people wanting to
help me and stuff like that, so, yeah, it's helped, really.
And that's what made me...
Obviously, I wanted to sort shit out and get things back on track,
but now I just want it even more.
Yeah, so, yeah, it's a good thing.
I texted my mum on Mother's Day.
I just said, "Happy Mother's Day,"
and again, I said sorry to her.
She replied
and thanked me for the message
and also just explained that she can't really get over
what I've done, which I totally understand,
but that she's happy for me to text now and again
and take it from there and see how it goes.
I've been doing well.
I've progressed quite far, actually, with my mental health appointments.
We're now just working on what issues have actually caused me
to get where I am and stuff,
so, yeah, taking it one day at a time.
She wants to stay here, never fucking move.
I don't have crooks downstairs through the fucking daytime.
She's fetched them down, dossing, chucking pins all over me.
Look at the state of my fucking carpet, mate.
I feel like crying.
She ended up just taking the piss,
and I couldn't get her out of my house,
and eventually, today, I've managed to get my locks changed.
So I've got a key back to my house now and my house back to myself.
I need to be settled in myself
before I think about being with anyone else.
My life is all over the place at the minute, so...
What's the best relationship you've been in?
Probably...my eldest son's dad.
But cos of the drugs and that, he always ended up going to prison,
and we ended up splitting up then.
When you're on drugs,
you're in a relationship with the drugs, aren't you?
You can't give all your time or yourself properly to someone else
cos drugs take up a lot of your time.
You're either...working to get money for them,
or chasing, trying to buy them
and then taking them.
So...it takes over a big part of your life.
Definitely.
He's just been using me the whole time...
..to get what he can.
He used to tan his wages, keep it all to himself
and then, like, with my money, what I'd bring in,
he'd, like, have whatever he wanted for him, basically.
But, at first, cos, I don't know, cos I cared about him or whatever,
I let him.
That soon stopped.
I only let it happen for so long.
And he got a shock cos I'm no fucking mug.
I'm not as green as I look.
I might act dumb and look dumb,
people might think it, then, I guess,
but they get a shock.
It hurts when you, like, care for someone and they hurt you, so...
if you don't allow it to happen, I guess, then...
..you can't be let down.
I swear to God, they just attacked me.
They've just battered me with bars up the street.
All those young 'uns. Can you see them stood down there?
They've just fucking...
SHE EXHALES DEEPLY
What the fuck?! Do you know what?
Never in me 28 years of fucking life, yeah,
have I had owt like that.
I thought we were little bastards when we were teenagers, yeah?
But we didn't do fucking shit like that, mate.
What actually just happened there, Adele?
I've walked down to Tesco's,
as I'm starting to walk up, they're starting to follow behind me,
you know, shouting and stuff.
I've crossed over the road,
the two lasses with the metal bars have followed me over, yeah?
Run up behind me...
..and have hit me between five to seven times with the metal bars
whilst saying stuff like, "Give me what you've got.
"Give me your phone." All this and that.
So, like some sort of fucking crank lad, got myself up,
I've had to start running, shouting out,
making myself look like some sort of fucking ding.
But I had no choice cos I was being fucking whacked with metal bars.
Are you all right, Adele?
I'm physically all right.
Mentally, fucking hell, that's a question to fucking ask.
KNOCK AT DOOR
Sorry, love, you can't come in.
Don't want her here any more, tell her.
KNOCK AT DOOR
Please, go away. She don't want you here, mate.
She's been attacked as well. Just go away.
The only fucking reason she wants to come here...
..is so she's got somewhere to fucking sit and do drugs,
and that's the only fucking reason.
It's this shit,
it's taking over me...
taking over me life, taking over me head.
It's taking over everything.