[MUSIC]
♪ JESUS, JESUS ♪♪
GINGER: ONE OF THE MOST RECOGNIZED AND CELEBRATED VOICES
IN THE CHRISTIAN MUSIC INDUSTRY, NATALIE GRANT
IS NO STRANGER TO SUCCESS.
[MUSIC]
NATALIE: ARE YOU GOING THROUGH A STORM?
SING IT OUT.
♪ OOO-WHOO ♪♪
HE'LL FIND YOU.
SING IT OUT.
GINGER: THIS SEVEN-TIME DOVE AWARD RECIPIENT HAS SEEN
MANY VICTORIES IN HER LIFE, BUT AS SHE SAYS,
"THERE'S NO VICTORY WITHOUT THE BATTLE."
SO, AMONGST ALL THE LIMELIGHT IS A LIFE CHANGED
THROUGH DIFFICULTIES.
NATALIE: I DON'T EVEN REMOTELY VIEW MYSELF
AS A SINGER NOW.
I SING.
I'M A TRUTH-TELLER.
I'M A TRUTH-TELLER AND I JUST USE THE VOICE
THAT GOD GAVE ME TO DO IT.
[MUSIC]
♪ JESUS ♪♪
GINGER: SO, HOW DID SHE ARRIVE AT THIS OUTLOOK?
NATALIE SAYS ONE OF HER MOST DIFFICULT STRUGGLES OCCURRED
BEFORE THE MUSIC CAREER BEGAN.
NATALIE: I THOUGHT, I WAS GOING
TO A CHRISTIAN COLLEGE, AND THERE WAS ALL THIS PRESSURE
THAT YOU HAD TO GET MARRIED BEFORE YOU LEFT BIBLE COLLEGE.
I THINK THEY CALL IT THE M-R-S DEGREE,
THE MRS. DEGREE.
AND I WAS LIKE, "WAIT, I GOTTA GET MY MRS. DEGREE
BEFORE I LEAVE BIBLE SCHOOL.
GINGER: YET, BEHIND THE SMILE WAS A GIRL SUFFERING
THROUGH AN EMOTIONALLY ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP.
NATALIE: AND HE WOULD SAY THE MOST DANGEROUS THINGS TO ME.
"YOU ARE ALMOST PRETTY.
YOU ARE ALMOST TALENT--
YOU ARE ALMOST GOOD ENOUGH."
GINGER: NATALIE SAYS HER DESPERATION FOR HIS APPROVAL
LED TO A BATTLE WITH BULIMIA.
NATALIE: I FELT LIKE MY ENTIRE LIFE WAS OUT OF CONTROL,
BUT THAT THING I DID IN THE PRIVACY OF MY OWN BATHROOM
AND MY OWN--THAT THING THAT NOBODY KNEW ABOUT,
THAT WAS THE THING I CONTROLLED.
GINGER: FAMILY AND FRIENDS INTERVENED,
BUT AN ENCOUNTER WITH GOD BEGAN THE HEALING PROCESS.
NATALIE: AND I REMEMBER AS I WAS THROWING UP, LITERALLY,
THAT STILL, SMALL VOICE SAID, "I AM HERE.
I DON'T WANT YOU TO DO THIS, BUT I'M GONNA HOLD BACK
YOUR HAIR."
AND IT WAS JUST THIS FEELING OF SUCH A LOVE
FROM A HEAVENLY FATHER, AND I WISH I COULD SAY
I STOOD UP AND NEVER DID IT AGAIN.
IT WAS DEFINITELY A LONG PROCESS.
SEVERAL YEARS OF LEARNING TO ALLOW THAT BEHAVIOR
TO BE CONTROLLED BY THE HOLY SPIRIT,
GETTING HELP FROM DOCTORS, AND REALLY ALLOWING, YOU KNOW,
PEOPLE INTO THAT REALLY DIRTY, UGLY PLACE,
AND ALLOWING ACCOUNTABILITY.
GINGER: THIS REALIZATION WOULD PREPARE NATALIE
FOR WHAT WAS TO COME, BUT FIRST, SUCCESS.
[MUSIC]
GINGER: NATALIE MARRIED MUSIC PRODUCER, BERNIE HERMS,
AND AFTER A STRUGGLE TO CONCEIVE, THEY BEGAN A FAMILY
WITH TWIN GIRLS.
DURING HER SECOND PREGNANCY, SHE EXPERIENCED
A VERY UNEXPECTED ISSUE.
NATALIE: I THINK THAT THE STRUGGLE BEGAN
WITH THE FEELINGS I HAD IN MY HEART OF,
"OH, WAIT A SECOND, HOW--
THIS IS GONNA COMPLICATE MY LIFE.
THIS IS HARD.
HOW--I CAN BARELY DO IT WITH THESE TWO.
HOW AM I GONNA DO IT WITH THREE?"
AND THAT WAS THE WAR, WAS, I HAVE THE THOUGHTS,
AND THEN I FEEL SO GUILTY THAT I HAVE THE THOUGHTS.
GINGER: BECAUSE OF HER INFERTILITY TREATMENTS
TO CONCEIVE THEIR TWINS, SHE KNEW WHAT A BLESSING
THESE CHILDREN TRULY ARE.
SO, WHEN SHE GOT PREGNANT WITH HER MIRACLE CHILD,
DEPRESSION WASN'T SUPPOSED TO FOLLOW.
NATALIE: I MISSED YOU TODAY!
NATALIE: GOD FORBID, WE LET PEOPLE KNOW
THAT WE'RE ACTUALLY, YOU KNOW, IN DEPRESSION BECAUSE
NOBODY LIKES TO TALK ABOUT DEPRESSION IN THE CHURCH,
BECAUSE IF YOU'RE DEPRESSED, YOU'RE JUST NOT
SPIRITUAL ENOUGH.
♪ ALIVE ♪
♪ YOU ARE ALIVE ♪
♪ LOOK WHAT MERCY'S OVERCOME ♪
♪ DEATH HAS LOST ♪
♪ BUT LOVE HAS WON ♪♪
GINGER: THROUGH HER BATTLE WITH BULIMIA,
SHE UNDERSTOOD THE BENEFIT OF CHRISTIAN COUNSELING,
AND WITH THIS CHALLENGE SHE DISCOVERED THE HEALING POWER
OF TRANSPARENCY.
NATALIE: JESUS HAS ALREADY ACCOMPLISHED EVERYTHING
THAT NEEDS TO BE ACCOMPLISHED FOR OUR HEALING,
BUT WE HAVE TO TAKE AHOLD OF THE HAND HE'S EXTENDING,
WE HAVE TO APPLY THAT TRUTH TO OUR LIFE.
SO, THERE IS SOMETHING WE HAVE TO DO.
GINGER: AND SO, THIS INSIGHT PREPARED HER
FOR HER GREATEST CHALLENGE.
NATALIE: I'LL JUST NEVER FORGET GETTING THAT PHONE CALL,
AND THEY SAID, "HEY, IT LOOKS LIKE THERE'S TWO SPOTS
ON THE RIGHT SIDE OF YOUR THYROID
THAT LOOK LIKE CANCER."
GINGER: SURGERY COULD RUIN HER VOCAL CORDS.
FEAR ATTACKED QUICKLY.
BUT NATALIE KNEW DELIVERANCE WOULD COME THROUGH OBEDIENCE.
NATALIE: HE BEGAN TO SHOW ME WHAT IT MEANS
TO TAKE EVERY THOUGHT CAPTIVE.
SO, I BEGAN TO WRITE DOWN THE TRUTH OF GOD.
I BEGAN TO WRITE IT DOWN ON NOTECARDS.
I BEGAN TO WRITE IT ON--
STICK IT ON STICKY NOTES ON MY MIRROR.
I PUT IT EVERYWHERE, AND AS SOON AS THOUGHTS
WOULD COME INTO MY MIND, I WOULD ACTUALLY REPLACE THEM
WITH THE TRUTH.
♪ YOU MAKE ME CLEAN ♪♪
GINGER: SURGERY A SUCCESS, VOICE INTACT, RELATIONSHIP
WITH GOD STRENGTHENED, BUT NOT BECAUSE
ALL WENT AS PLANNED.
NATALIE: I REMEMBER LAYING IN MY BED...
I REMEMBER LAYING IN MY BED AND I JUST THOUGHT, "LORD,
PLEASE DON'T TAKE ME FROM MY CHILDREN,
AND PLEASE DON'T TAKE THIS THING THAT I USE
TO TELL PEOPLE ABOUT YOU," AND I WAS REALIZING THAT I WAS
ASKING FOR ALL OF THESE THINGS FOR ME, THAT I WAS AT THE CENTER
OF ALL OF MY PRAYERS.
[YELLING EXCITINGLY]
NATALIE: I HAD TO ALLOW HIM TO DO SOMETHING
IN MY HEART AND LIFE BEFORE I GOT TO THE ANSWER,
BEFORE I GOT TO THE MIRACLE, AND THAT WAS THAT HE IS GOOD
NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS IN MY LIFE, THAT HIS GOODNESS
IS NOT DEFINED BY MY CIRCUMSTANCES,
THAT MY OUTCOME DOES NOT DETERMINE HIS GOODNESS.
♪ JESUS, JESUS ♪
♪ HOW I TRUST YOU ♪♪
GINGER: AND THIS UNDERSTANDING IS WHAT SHE WANTS
TO SHARE WITH ANYONE WHO WILL LISTEN.
IT'S ALSO WHY THIS AWARD-WINNING SUCCESSFUL ARTIST,
WIFE, AND MOTHER-OF-THREE DESCRIBES HERSELF AS SIMPLY
A TRUTH-TELLER.
NATALIE: VICTORIES ARE WONDERFUL AND THANK YOU JESUS
THAT HE DOES DELIVER US AND BRING US TO VICTORY,
BUT IT'S IN THE BATTLE THAT WE NOT ONLY LEARN
ABOUT WHO GOD IS, BUT WE LEARN WHO WE REALLY ARE.
[MUSIC]
GINGER: HEY, THANKS SO MUCH FOR WATCHING.
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