There are two things that I want to talk about today.
First word is drunk, second word is shopping.
Put those two words together, and you got drop chunking.
Which is how you pronounce it when you're doing it.
A new study came out that said that people who shop online
after they've been drinking are boosting the economy,
because they spend $40 billion a year.
[APPLAUSE]
Drinking, drinking, drinking, drinking, drinking, drinking!
The number one thing people buy when they're drunk
is food, and then clothing.
And then cigarettes and then more alcohol.
It's a real loop-de-loo of bad decisions right there.
How many of you have shopped drunk before?
[CHEERING]
I know you have, because we asked you before the show.
You hear a whole bunch of winos with credit cards
is what you are.
Let me tell you somethings things that y'all have--
this is really interesting to me.
This is a brand new area that we're tapping into.
Finally Season 16, I'm learning about my audience firsthand.
Chelsea Chanet, or Chanay?
Chelsea?
Hi.
What's your last name?
Chanet.
OK.
You said you had a couple of drinks with friends,
and thought you would sign up for tickets to The Ellen Show.
Yeah.
So you had to be drunk in order to want to be here?
Yeah, we had a drink before coming here.
Not going to lie.
That's not what I said, but--
it just seems like you just drink just to drink.
My question is, but why did you have
to be drunk to decide to have tickets to come to my show?
Well, we were-- one night we were drinking,
and we were on Facebook, and I saw--
Yeah, I know the process.
My question is, why did you--
you couldn't make the decision sober?
You didn't go, I want to go see The Ellen Show.
Yeah.
No.
Sorry.
OK.
How much did you pay for the tickets?
None.
Yeah.
It was free.
They're free, right?
So it shouldn't have been that hard to decide.
It's not like, well, I guess I'll spend the money.
So you've watched the show before.
Yeah.
I've seen it.
I'm done with you Chelsea, sit down.
Oh, boy.
Claudia Rosales?
Right here!
Oh boy.
And very excited, too.
Very excited.
Hi.
You said you bought handcuffs.
Yes.
OK.
So what made you buy handcuffs?
My boyfriend and I were looking online shopping,
and we just decided we wanted to spice things up,
and that just happened to be one of the things
that we looked at.
Right.
OK.
And so you said, yeah, let's buy those.
Let's try it.
OK, how long ago was that?
Three years ago?
OK.
Have you used them?
No.
You haven't been drunk enough again
to decide that's a good idea?
But three years you've had them, but you haven't used them.
No.
Well, maybe tonight's the night.
You know?
We all want you to do it.
Yeah.
Yeah!
Go home and do it tonight, and then get in touch with us
and let us know.
Or send-- better yet, send us a photo.
All right.
Thank you, Joanna Cardenas.
Hi Joanna.
Cardenas, is that right?
Yeah, you got it right.
OK, thank you.
You said I went to a naughty party drunk and left with--
all right I'm not going to read the rest of this.
My mother is here today, so--
so what did you buy?
Well, I ended up with--
my kids think it's a lava lamp, but I
call her glitter sparkles.
They think it's a lava lamp?
It lights up.
How big is that lava lamp would you say about?
A couple inches.
Like that?
OK.
All right.
And also a necklace that my daughter calls a necklace.
They come in colors now.
Wait, what do you mean, your daughter calls it a necklace?
Well, they're the ones that opened it.
They thought it was a package from Amazon.
Right.
But what is it if it's not a necklace?
Can I say it on TV?
You must.
I don't know why I got--
I got [BLEEP] beads.
[LAUGHING]
Oh.
Lady next to my mother, don't tell her.
All right.
OK.
You could just start slow with handcuffs,
or something like that.
I should have.
All right, and have you had--
any have you-- did you enjoy any of the purchases?
I still get messages if I want to renew my--
I got a warranty, too.
Didn't know they came with warranties.
OK.
All right, thank you so much.
I don't want to encourage these purchases,
but if you shared your drunk purchase you're
getting a bottle of wine, and be sure to pass through the Ellen
Shop on the way out.