What happens when 800 of the world’s most elite footballers
and their managers live together under one roof?
Players stop being polite
and start getting Real
This is
The Champions
I'm Paul and I know how to make headlines
I've scored more times in Manchester than Noel Gallagher
I'm so good
I'm in the MLS, and they still put me in this intro
Everybody knows I’m at the same level as Messi and Ronaldo…
...why is everybody laughing?
Bayern Munich Oktoberfest
Ooh
Absolutely nicht
Aw! First, the World Cup. Now this!?
I don’t get to go to anything fun
OK, for one, the World Cup sucked this year.
Secondly, zis party is for dummkopfs
Marco, please!
They have a chocolate fountain...just like home!
As your captain, I say NEIN!
He has a chocolate fountain... in his home?
Yes, I’m from Hershey
It’s weird there
So every year, Bayern zey throw zis party
and act like zey are just cool fun guys
But really, ze whole thing
is just a ploy to poach ze best young players
from ze other Bundesliga teams
Marco’s a vee bit sensitive about zis
because he’s lost many Dortmund friends over ze years
Lewandowski
Hummels
And of course
me
What can I say?
I was young, and I needed to Pep my cherry
Hey, have you guys seen my lederhosen?
I can’t find zem
Scheisse!
Ow
Heja BVB!
Wow! Zer’s like twice as many people at zis party
as there is in Hoffenheim
Ja! I just saw someone I didn’t know!
Hey, where is coach?
C’mon, let me through
My whole team is in there
Sorry. I have to see ID for anyone who looks 16 or younger.
Hey zer!
Oh hi
You’re ze American kid for Dortmund, right?
Chris?
Christian, yeah
Oh cool, cool
I’m Jerome
Zis is Thomas
Oh, please
You can just call me Raumdeuter
Raumdeuter is a nickname I gave to myself
There’s no word in English for it
but it sort of means “space interpreter.”
It’s very cool actually
Do you see him anywhere?
Nein
If I were American, where would I be?
Aha!
At the weisswurst breakfast sausage station
after breakfast time!
Hurensöhne!
Zer he is. Let’s go...TZE!
So yeah...it’s my new bar
The Flying Dutchman
We’re having an after-party there
You should come
We don’t go to DIVE bars!
So what’s, like, your favorite thing about the Bundesliga?
If I’m being honest
I don’t really consider us in ze Bundesliga
Yeah...we’re sort of like PSG in Ligue 1
or Justin Timberlake in NSYNC…
Let’s just say if ze Bundesliga is Baywatch
we’re David Hasselhoff
He doesn’t know David Hasselhoff. You know why?
Because he’s ONLY 20 YEARS OLD, YOU BAVARIAN CREEPS!
Raumdeuter
Are you OK?
No! I just need some space.
Just please give me some space to interpret!
You can’t be talking to zem
Zey are all jerks!
You’re not my dad
You’re just bitter because they never wanted you
How dare you
Fine. You want him?
€70 million, and he’s yours
Wait, what?
For him?
70...million?
For him? No thanks.