Heya playa, have you ever been to a party and saw a girl that you wanted to approach
but you just didn't know how to start that conversation?
You didn't know the right thing to get her attention or to pull her away from all the
people she was talking to?
Don't worry, in this video, I'm going to share a few tips on what you can say and what you
can do to get her attention at a party.
This is The Josh Speaks.
You're watching The Josh Speaks.
For those of you that are new here, my name is Josh and every single Monday through Friday
I make videos sharing tips, ideas and stories teaching you how to be your best self.
Now if you want to start a conversation with someone at a party, it's super different from
how you would at school, or even just talking to someone random in the street.
Parties are generally way more laid back so the type of conversations you're going to
start with people aren't going to be so in depth and heavy on the topics.
And the reason I say that is because parties are a place where there's a high volume of
interaction for people.
So if a person feels weighed down in one conversation they might feel like they're losing out in
interacting with other people.
So how exactly should you start a conversation?
Well, let's look at a few different scenarios and work it out from there.
Let's say in the first scenario, the person is there by themselves.
They're not really talking to anyone or interacting.
They're kind of just maybe are sitting around by themselves looking at their phone or holding
their drink.
Just waiting for someone to kind of approach them and talk to them.
In a case like that I would approach them and say something playful like "Hey, why are
you sitting by yourself?
You're like the coolest person in the room."
Normally if a person is sitting by themselves, they may or may not want to interact with
someone.
So I would set up a time constraint for themselves to help them feel a bit of reassurance that
you're not just gonna kinda linger over and they'll have no way to escape.
Try to slip into the beginning of the conversation something like "Hey, I'm gonna get back to
my friends but I wanted to talk to you for a minute" or "Hey I was gonna go refill my
drink but I wanted to chat with you".
That'll help them feel way more comfortable around you and way more open to sharing things
with you.
But, let's change up the scenario here.
Let's say that person is in a conversation with one other person.
The two of them are talking and you want to approach that girl, what do you do?
Now this specifically is a point where context really matters.
Who is that person that they're talking to?
Is it someone that they're interested in?
Is it just a friend?
Is it a boyfriend or girlfriend?
Try to get a better read on who they're talking to before you approach them so you don't end
up walking in on something serious.
One mistake that a lot of guys make when they approach a girl at a party who's talking to
someone is that the only focus on talking to that girl and totally ignore the person
that they're talking to.
If you're going to approach them for a conversation, the last thing you want to do is alienate
the person that they're speaking to because when you start to do that, both of them are
going to realize that hey, you came in with an agenda and you kind of disrupted the flow
of what they had going on.
So how exactly do you get that third person to just like of move away and leave you alone?
Well, I think what you do is in the beginning of the conversation you start talking to both
of them and as the conversation goes on, you start to shift your attention towards the
person that you're interested in.
You might want to walk up to them with a bit of a diffuser at the beginning of that conversation
by saying something like "Hey guys, sorry to interrupt but I wanted to get your opinion
on something and I want to hear what both of you have to say".
That way no one feels ignored in the little triangle you have going on and like I said,
as you start to shift your attention towards the person that you're interested in the third
person is probably going to start taking the hint that hey, I'm not really part of this
conversation anymore.
But once you're in the third scenario where the person you want to talk to is part of
a bigger group of people and they're all interacting with each other, how can you even break into
that group and make something happen?
Well in this case, you're going to pull pieces from the first and second examples that I
gave you.
You're going to set up a time constraint when you approach them and you're going to interact
with everyone that's there.
In the past, I've personally approached a group, talked to a girl and eventually made
her my girlfriend which you can check out the video over here but basically, that's
gonna be the key.
The whole idea is to approach the group, get them to feel more comfortable around you so
interact with every single person that's there and then eventually shift your attention over
to your crush.
When you ask the group a question and then that girl ends up answering, you can always
focus a little bit more on her answer.
Either agree with her or disagree with her but that's your opportunity to be a little
bit more playful in your interaction with her at that party.
Some of you may also be thinking, ok that's great so that's how I can start the conversation
but what can I actually talk to them about.
So, I would definitely recommend checking out my 20 ice breaker conversation starters,
I'm gonna link it up here because I think those are different things you can work into
the conversation just to get things going so neither of you feel awkward at that party.
But now I want to know, what do you think?
What kind of person are you at parties.
Are you a talkative person?
Are you shy?
Do you find it difficult to approach people and talk to them?
Leave your comments down below and we'll talk about it.
If you found this video to be helpful, hit the thumbs up button and thank you so much
for watching it.
And remember guys, my new book Embracing The Awkward, you can see it over here comes out
tomorrow so if you want to order it, it's over on Amazon.
The link will be down in the description below, check it out guys I think it'll be super helpful
for you.
On that note, I'll catch you tomorrow.
As always, love and peace.