If you’ve gone through a breakup that you feel should never have happened… if you
feel like you and your ex belong together, and you’re desperate for a way to get a
second chance… you need a PLAN to make that happen.
You need a proven, effective strategy that will take you from the point you’re at now
with your ex to a point where you’re back in their arms, officially together again.
Why do I say you need a plan?
Because I see so many people try to go it alone, figure it out on the fly, and make
mistakes or miss opportunities because they don’t have a clear strategy that will actually
work… that will actually end happily back together with their ex.
I don’t want you to fall into that kind of situation, so here in this video, I’ll
give you the best possible plan to make sure you win back your ex and find that second
chance you’re dreaming of.
Before we begin, if you’re new here…
I’m Brad Browning, aka Breakup Brad or The Ex Back Geek…
I’ve been a breakup coach for 13+ years, and I’ve helped over 140,000 clients from
131 countries get through a tough breakup and get back together with their ex.
If you’re looking for trustworthy advice and guidance with your breakup situation,
you’re in the right place.
Now, let’s talk about this Grand Plan to win back your ex, shall we?
First, let me be honest with you… the very best plan for getting your ex back is my Ex
Factor Guide.
It’s an online training program that I’ve created after years as a breakup coach, and
it is quite simply the single most comprehensive and most popular guide to getting back with
an ex.
I know that sounds kind of arrogant to say, but I’m so confident that The Ex Factor
program will give you your best possible shot at rekindling things with your ex that I guarantee
your success if you sign up for the program at my website, BreakupBrad.com.
Once you sign up, you get access immediately, and you can try out the program and implement
it for a full 60 days risk-free.
If you don’t like it, if it doesn’t work for you… return it any time within 60 days
for a full refund.
If you want to learn more, visit BreakupBrad.com now or when this video is over and take me
up on my risk-free offer to get started right now.
OK, that’s my sales pitch -- let’s move on.
I’m going to give you the abbreviated version of my Ex Factor program here in this video,
and if you follow the advice I’ll be sharing, you’ll be well on your way to successfully
getting another chance with your ex.
Hopefully soon, although I’m not going to guarantee you’ll succeed immediately -- it
can take weeks or months depending on your situation.
Nonetheless, let’s start with step 1.
The basis of my Ex Factor program is what i call the 3R system: Recovery, Rekindling,
and Reattraction.
The first phase, the Recovery phase, covers roughly the first month after breaking up…
or if it’s already been a while since the breakup, the first 30 days from now.
The Recovery phase is partly what it sounds like: a time for you to recover from the worst
of the post-breakup emotions and heartache.
But more than that, it’s also the period where you’re going to isolate yourself from
your ex to set yourself up for success in the next two phases.
Now, if you’re thinking to yourself…
“C’mon Brad, I’m recovered enough, let me jump straight to the next step”...
no, sorry, that’s not how it works.
Even if you really are in the right emotional state of mind, your ex isn’t.
You can’t skip the Recovery phase, because it’s essential to set the stage for the
Rekindling period that comes next.
The most important element of the Recovery phase is of course the 30 Day No Contact strategy.
You knew this was coming… and I’m not going to disappoint you.
The first step to a successful plan for getting your ex back is always a period of No Contact.
As hard as it can be to implement…
as much as you may want to find another method out there that doesn’t require you to go
silent and ignore your ex for several weeks… there is no shortcut.
No Contact is critical in 99% of all breakups.
I’ve actually made a video already about the few rare situations where No Contact ISN’T
always required, which I’ll link to in the description below… but for the vast majority
of you watching this, you’re going to need to implement No Contact.
As soon as possible.
The reason why is simple: No Contact has several key benefits that simply can’t be achieved
any other way.
First, quickly and completely shutting down communication with your ex forces them to
go “cold turkey” instead of allow them to wean themselves off you over time.
They can’t just pick up the phone to hear your voice any time they miss you, because
you’re not going to be around to answer.
They’ll just have to face that pain and loneliness on their own.
This sounds cruel, and it can be hard on your ex, but that heartache your ex will feel is
only going to make them want you back… and make them wonder if they made a mistake breaking
up.
Secondly, No Contact is the only way to make your ex miss you as much as possible.
You can’t miss something or someone that’s a part of your life.
The more you’re around your ex after breaking up -- the more you text one another, meet
up for coffee, etc -- the less they’ll miss you.
And as you’ll know if you watched some of my past videos, you need them to miss you
in order for them to feel that desperation and urge to take you back.
The more your ex misses you, the more tempting it will be for them to give in to their emotions
and ask you to take them back.
Thirdly, and on a similar note, No Contact is designed to get your ex back to what I
call an “Emotional Neutral” state.
It will put them in a place where they’re going to be most likely to respond positively
to what comes next in the Rekindling phase.
And the 30 day timeframe that I usually recommend for No Contact is based on science and research
that shows this is the average amount of time it takes for people to reach that “sweet
spot” where they’ll be most receptive to your Rekindling efforts in Step 2.
Finally, No Contact gives YOU time to get a handle on your own emotions, put yourself
together, and start doing fun and interesting things with your life that your ex is going
to want to hear about and be part of.
More than that, it’s the perfect opportunity for you to take on some self-improvement,
get ahead in life at work or school or in your social circle, etc.
No Contact isn’t JUST about ignoring your ex, which is why I often call it “Dynamic
No Contact” -- it’s a period of time with little or no communication with your ex, but
it’s absolutely not a period where you can just sit at home on the couch watching Netflix
alone.
It’s a time you can really seize the opportunity, grow as a person, make new friends, and so
on… all of which will set you up for the next phase, Rekindling, which starts at the
end of your period of No Contact.
Congrats, you’ve made it through the Recovery phase and completed a period of No Contact.
Your ex is likely now in a place where their feelings of missing you are at their peak
-- they’ve had limited or no contact with you for several weeks at least, they’re
desperate to hear from you and curious about what you’ve been up to and why you haven’t
been around like they probably assumed you would be following the breakup.
More than that, science shows that this is roughly the time where they’re most likely
to have begun letting go of their negative memories and emotions…
they’re no longer fixated on the bad parts of your relationship that contributed to the
decision to break up, but they’re still longing for the good times and nostalgic for
the positive things you brought to their life.
Obviously, then, this is a perfect time to re-engage and re-open the dialogue with your
ex.
BUT -- and remember, this video is all about having a clear plan to get your ex back -- you
need to re-establish contact in a specific way.
You can’t just call up your ex on day 30 and ask them to take you back… that’s
a recipe for disaster.
You need to start slow, be patient, and work your way towards step 3 where things really
start to come together.
I always recommend using texts or WhatsApp or some kind of text messaging platform to
reach out after No Contact….
In-person meetups and phone conversations are far more likely to backfire or go badly,
and you could end up unintentionally saying or doing something that will really set you
back and hurt your chances.
So stick to texting initially, and always have a clear goal with whatever message you’re
sending your ex.
Don’t just “wing it”... think it through, come up with a good, interesting message that
will make your ex laugh or smile or remember a happy shared memory…
basically know exactly what you want to say, and what you hope to achieve with that message,
before you hit the send button.
I made a video on this exact topic -- how to re-connect after No Contact -- just a few
months ago.
Again, I’ll link to that in the description below if you want more specific examples and
ideas for what to say and how to handle the initial conversations.
In summary, it’s all about making sure your message has a purpose: sharing a joke you
know your ex will appreciate and laugh at, asking a specific question you know they’ll
be able to answer, updating them on a situation or story in your life they’ll care about…
those kinds of things have a purpose, and they’re not just closed or pointless “hey
what’s up” messages that will get you nowhere.
I’ve also included a ton of example texts in my Ex Factor program that you can basically
copy and paste… if you want to learn about those and the rest of my full online course,
just visit BreakupBrad.com, watch the free tutorial video, and sign up today.
Now, the Rekindling phase is called “Rekindling” for a reason…
this is all about warming up your ex for what comes next….
Breaking down their walls and ensuring they don’t see you as a “threat” or see your
true intentions… and also to remind them how much fun you can be, how much positivity
you brought to their life, and why they fell for you in the first place.
Think of this phase as pouring gasoline on a pile of wood… you haven’t lit the match
yet, but when you do, it’s going to burst into flames.
Sometimes, you can move into Step 3 -- the Reattraction phase -- after just a few text
message exchanges with your ex.
For some people, though -- depending on the details of your specific situation -- it might
take quite a bit longer.
You need to be patient, and you can’t rush the process.
You want to interpret your ex’s reaction and replies to each of your messages carefully
to gauge how receptive they’re being and how likely it is they’ll react positively
when you suggest meeting in person.
While it can be tempting to just rush through the Rekindling phase after a couple of good
texting exchanges, moving too fast can lead you to a major setback.
There’s one other thing you need to know about this phase: you’re not trying to win
back your ex with any single message or conversation.
In fact, you don’t even want to really treat these texts you’ll be sending as conversation
starters…
the goal isn’t to open a long meaningful conversation with your ex.
At least not initially.
It’s to remind them how awesome you still are, spark some curiosity and intrigue so
they want to know more, and basically get them to a point where they’re no longer
focused on the problems that led to your breakup.
For this reason, you never want to get too serious with your early texting exchanges,
and always want to leave your ex smiling or feeling positive and nostalgic.
Don’t ever let yourself get drawn into any drama, bickering, or boring chats… try to
be the one to end any back-and-forth exchanges with your ex, try to leave out plenty of details
to leave your ex wanting more, and try to make it extremely obvious to your ex that
you’ve been absolutely kicking ass in life since the breakup and you’re thriving without
them.
This is the opposite of what your ex will be expecting, and it’s a very attractive
thing for your ex that will put them in the right frame of mind for the final phase….
Awesome, you made it to the final R: re-attraction.
You’ve re-opened positive communication with your ex, exchanged a handful of positive
and enjoyable messages with your ex to re-start contact and get them thinking about you and
remembering all the fun and excitement and companionship you brought to their life…..
Now it’s time to take the final step and turn this friendly banter into an in-person
meet-up, flirting, and a real romantic connection.
When the time is right -- and again, this will vary a lot depending on your situation
-- you need to find a reason to propose a “coffee date” with your ex to catch up.
Don’t call it a “date” -- in fact, it’s critical that your ex thinks this first meet-up
isn’t going to be romantic or anything threatening.
When I say you need a “reason” to propose meeting in person, I mean you need to think
of something that will serve as a legitimate excuse to meet.
This can be as simple as asking them to help you with your upcoming physics exam, asking
for advice planning an upcoming vacation, or sharing some hilarious or interesting story
that they simply need to hear in person.
Whatever it is, just be sure it will pass your ex’s sniff test and not set off any
alarm bells.
If you handled the Step 2 Rekindling phase properly, they’ll almost certainly agree
to meet.
When you’re finally together in person again, there’s 3 rules that you need to remember:
#1 - Always keep it fun, casual, and upbeat.
Just like your texts during the previous phase, don’t ever let things get serious or heated
when you’re talking with your ex.
No digging up old dirt, no asking about whether they’re dating again, no jealousy or depressing
serious talk… just show your ex a good time.
Make them laugh, smile, and remember your positive attributes and all the things they
loved about you when you were together.
#2 - Flirt and build sexual tension.
Yes, your ex thinks this is just a friendly meet-up over coffee, but you want to flirt
as much as you can without going overboard.
The more receptive your ex is to your flirting and advances, the more you have a green light
to continue to ramp things up.
Playfully touch them, tease them, drop a sexual innuendo….
Just flirt.
Treat it like a first date.
This can be tricky, obviously, and you’ll have to read the situation and adjust your
behaviour accordingly… but you want to make your ex attracted to you, sexually desire
you, and see all your best attributes.
#3 - Don’t rush it.
Sometimes it’ll take 3 or 4 in-person encounters with your ex to make real progress.
If your ex isn’t really responding that well to your flirting, back down a bit and
just aim for a fun encounter with your ex that ends well and leaves the door open to
more meetings in the near future.
You may have to slow things down, revert to occasional texting exchanges, etc at times
if things aren’t progressing that well after the first couple of meet-ups with your ex.
Unfortunately, I can’t really go into any more detail here in this video -- again, visit
BreakupBrad.com and sign up for a risk-free trial of my full Ex Factor program for a complete
step-by-step guide to the Reattraction phase and answers to all your “what if” questions.
At the very least, please watch the free tutorial video at BreakupBrad.com to get some more
tips and psychological ‘hacks’ you can use on your ex to ensure this phase goes as
well as possible.
And if you run into issues or have a particularly unusual situation you’re facing with your
ex -- be it in this Reattraction phase or anywhere along the way -- consider signing
up for a month of my 1-on-1 personal coaching to get my help as things unfold.
I’ll learn about your situation, gauge where you’re at, and we’ll work together to
make sure you maximize your chances and don’t accidentally take any steps backward.
You can sign up at BreakupBrad.com/Coaching any time you need my help.
If you’ve watched all the way to this point in the video…
thank you, and congratulations.
It’s time to go put all of what you’ve learned into practice and start winning back
your ex.
I sincerely hope you succeed, and I really do think you’ll be giving yourself the absolute
best possible chance by following the plan I’ve shared with you.
In exchange for giving you a clear plan that’s actually got a great chance of working…
I only ask that you click like, subscribe to my channel, and leave a comment or question
below if you have a minute to spare.
Again, all the best of luck, thanks for watching… see you next time!