One of the most confusing things
for people who are aware of signs
and who are aware of synchronicities
is that sometimes if you follow those signs and synchronicities
you end up in a situation that doesn't feel like a good thing.
And when that happens you're standing there like:
"Wait a minute,
this doesn't feel good.
I don't get it, there are so many signs.
There's actually a really good cosmic universal reason for this,
and it's this reason that we're gonna be discussing
in this episode.
Disclaimer (pause to read):
Signs and synchronicities aren't always leading you to something that feels good
The universe
is primarily concerned with expansion.
Not only at a macrocosmic level,
but also at a microcosmic personal level.
It cares about your personal expansion.
Expansion is one of the main reasons
why we even have the capacity to perceive time
in this time space reality.
It is so that we can perceive progress,
so we can perceive expansion.
Progress and expansion
is ultimately completely in alignment with your best interests.
After all, expansion
really is also about closing that gap
between where you are and where you wanna be.
Which we could argue is where your happiness is.
But here's the thing,
ultimately, whether something is good and right for you
and feels good and right for you,
is, uh...
sometimes two separate things. Did you notice?
This is why you might experience your emotional guidance system
leading you to something painful instead of pleasurable.
If you wanna learn more about this in depth,
you can watch my video titled:
How Your Inner Compass Leads You To Both Pleasure and Pain
Experiences that are difficult
and experiences that are hurt
are not without value.
The thing is, is that we often don't see that value
or the necessity for something
or how important it was, until way after the fact
when we're looking back in retrospect.
It doesn't feel like that in the middle of it.
It's this knowledge
that just because something doesn't feel right and good
it doesn't necessarily mean it isn't right and good for you.
And you can often tell that in retrospect.
It's with that in mind
that I want to give you an example
to highlight a reason why the universe
might be giving you signs and synchronicities
that might lead you to a situation
that sure as hell doesn't feel like a good thing.
Liz...
Liz had a childhood with parents that largely ignored her.
She ended up in so much emotional pain.
Her only way of mitigating this emotional pain
was really to play a game of pretend,
but the thing is
is for children who are using this as a coping mechanism,
that game of pretend is not so much a game.
In Liz's little pretend game,
which is not so much a game,
she was a princess who was switched out at birth
for her own safety, of course.
And she's just waiting around with these commoners
for the day that her prince will come rescue her
and restore her back to the throne.
As Liz got older,
this coping mechanism still worked for her,
so she continued it.
And she especially continued these games of pretend
in relationships with men.
She imagined that she could be in a relationship
with literally any man.
In truth this is because she wasn't really with
any of the men that she got into a relationship with.
Each man was just a person playing a part of the prince
that she still had in her own head.
Liz was always in a relationship.
She spent no time
trying to get to know who a man actually was
before jumping into a relationship with him.
She would idolize him
and imagine him to be totally different
than what he actually was
she would obsess over him and obsessively seek his comfort
until he didn't match the character that she had in her head.
And then, he would experience a fall from grace.
She would end up in a violent breakup with him
and end up with a different man the next day.
She bounced from man to man like a hot potato.
Liz's psychologist told her that she had love addiction.
Liz struggles with overlays.
This is her coping mechanism in life.
To understand what overlays are in depth,
I encourage you to watch my video titled:
Overlay (What Prevents You From Having A Real Relationship)
Long story short these overlays were ruining Liz's life.
And they were holding her apart from what she really wanted.
When Liz who's a spiritual woman,
met Jeff,
she was shocked at the level of science and synchronicities.
I mean it was shocking.
For example,
Jeff had the same birthday
as her first love from high school.
Second, no matter where they went
ravens were there.
Third, during that first week
that they were entertaining the idea of getting into a relationship together
every time Liz turned around and looked at the clock
It was either 11:11
or 4:44, the way forward.
On top of this,
ironically,
Liz's mother had always told her since she was a little girl
that she was totally convinced
that she should be with a man from Australia.
And guess where Jeff is from?
Australia.
Not only that, when they were comparing notes
it turns out that some years ago
they were in Europe backpacking across Europe
at the exact same time.
Okay, at this point Liz knows exactly what these signs mean.
"It means this is the love of my life
this is the man that the universe has always been trying
to get me to meet."
The problem is Liz was in an overlay about Jeff.
She was using her interpretations of those signs
to slip even deeper into an overlay
and miss every red flag about Jeff.
Here are the red flags that she missed:
Jeff had kids in Australia,
but he lived in a different country from them.
Jeff seemed to already know everything about Liz.
Jeff loved breaking rules everywhere they went.
Jeff was in the lawsuit when they met.
Jeff would laugh when they would pass by roadkill,
and explain it away as being so emotionally uncomfortable for him
that he would just start laughing.
Jeff would often lie and manipulate to get what he wanted,
even in little interactions like when they were at the grocery store
and he pretended to be blind so that he could sit in a handicap only chair.
To make a long story short,
Jeff was afflicted with psychopathy.
In fact, his children were taken away from him
and out from underneath his custody
when he decided to punish his ex-wife
the mother of the children, by kidnapping both his own kids
and trying to take them to the opposite side of Australia.
In fact, Jeff had several legal issues in Australia.
Which is part of why he wasn't there.
On top of this,
he had chosen Liz as his new target.
He had already done all kinds of research on her,
so he knew exactly what to say.
Like for example,
turquoise wasn't his real favorite color,
he'd already researched it was hers,
he just knew that by saying that it was his as well,
that she would fall for it.
He set everything up so he could love bomb her.
And once Liz committed to Jeff, he ruined her life.
He separated Liz and isolated her from every person in her life.
He was so emotionally abusive,
that she developed an eating disorder,
he came up with excuses as to why she had to help him with money
and eventually, gained access to her financial accounts
and drained them.
He lacked empathy completely.
And at the end of the relationship they got into a fight
and he set fire to their house with her cat inside of it.
Obviously,
when Liz is in the situation,
now, she's feeling like:
"My god, the universe is against me.
Like, straight up, I don't get it.
There are signs and synchronicities everywhere saying
"Yes! Go for this guy!",
and now I'm here".
Actually, from an objective point of view
there's a real good reason for this.
I'll explain now;
From an objective perspective
the universe led Liz to Jeff
because Jeff was the man who could completely collapse
the very coping mechanism that was making her life impossible.
And was preventing her personal expansion.
Jeff was so horrible
that Liz could no longer imagine
that overlays and a game of pretend
was safe.
In fact, it changed everything.
Now, the only way for Liz to be safe
was to be deeply in reality
about whatever man she was with
and noticing whatever red flags were there
from the very get-go.
In other words,
the consequence was so high this time,
it actually broke her love addiction.
not only that,
it restored her ability to discern.
One of the most important elements in life
and definitely in relationships.
Consequently, now, on top of actually being able to discern
because of that she was actually able to find a guy who is compatible
and definitely is not gonna set fire to her house
with her cat inside it.
Therefore I'm going to sum it up this way:
when the universe continues to give you
these signs and these synchronicities
it is always an indication
that there is something very important and valuable
inherent in a situation.
Something that definitely has to do with your personal expansion.
So one could argue
that by going in the direction of them,
you're definitely lining up with your own expansion.
And ultimately, lining up with your expansion
means going in the direction of your own personal happiness.
But, to think that
when the universe gives you these signs and synchronicities
it's always leading you to something that will feel good,
is a big, big mistake.
The reality is, when you get these signs and synchronicities
the universe might be leading you to something that might feel good,
and it also might be leading you
to something that feels really really bad.
Like, really bad...
But still, has value.
After all,
the road that will take us
to what we ultimately want
might be a very very very dark road.
And it's most likely
gonna be the road we least expect.
Have a good week.
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I wanna thank you personally
for the bravery that you have to step into awareness.
I'll see you in the next video.
Subtitles by: Tanya Duarte @tanyaduarte / tanyaduarte.com