So, guys, my new camera arrived!
It's like Christmas!
I am challenging myself to documenting my whole crazy,
stupid life, which means
I am going to shoot and edit a video every single day.
Things are actually a bit mental at the moment.
Like, I've got loads of stupid exams coming up at school.
My sister Tara's birthday is soon and I have not got her anything yet.
Awkward!
And my dad's getting remarried in a couple of months to a total nutter,
which I am totally dreading.
I also really want to get fit.
Look at those pathetic chicken arms.
What even is that?
So, maybe it's not a good idea to commit myself to making
a video every day
but, hey, life is short
and I really can't wait to get stuck in and challenge myself.
Let's see what happens.
Er - let's do this.
Mum! Tara!
My new camera came!
Guys, say hello.
Hello. Ooh, it's so pretty! Ooh.
Hello, world. It's me, Tara!
THEY LAUGH Smile for the camera.
Oh, Imogene, don't be filming me, my hair's a mess today.
Your hair looks gorgeous.
The camera loves you. Imo,
I've been learning the worm. I'm getting really good.
SHE LAUGHS
OK.
Oh, God, stop! THEY LAUGH
Tara, you literally suck at that.
Don't be mean to your sister. She's trying. I don't suck!
I'm getting really good at it.
You are hilariously bad.
OK, that is going to go viral.
Er, yeah, I'm going to be famous.
I suppose you're going to be using this to video
every second of the day.
That's the plan. Yeah, well,
I don't want the entire world
looking into my living room.
Mm, better do some housework, Mum.
Er, here's an idea.
How about you and your sister do some housework for a change? Er,
I hoovered my room this morning.
Er, yeah, for about five seconds.
Why don't you make a video of cleaning the bathroom?
I bet you loads of people would watch that.
Oh, my God, Mum, you are such a fountain of brilliant ideas.
Yeah, maybe Mum should get her own channel.
Maybe I will. I'm sure about two people would watch.
Oh! SHE YOWLS
How dare you!
You cheeky... Stop! THEY LAUGH
Stop tickling Tara!
I'm going to wet myself!
Stop, Mum, stop!
Oh, God.
So, here I am in my shit school with my main gals.
Girls, say hello. Hiya.
Sky. Annienoos!
I keep telling you, Imo, I do not look good on screen.
Come on! Get that thing away for me.
No! I want to enjoy my lunch in peace, thank you very much.
Rejection. Ouch!
Rosa, any thoughts of the day?
Smash the patriarchy and fuck all men.
Rosa loves men, actually.
Er, no, I don't. You can say that again. No, I don't.
OK, I want to speak to all the people out there.
Oh, for God's sake.
Listen to me and you won't have to make the same horrible mistakes
that I did. No. What?
Men are pigs. Get it?
Every last one of them. And I don't care what you say.
They're liars.
Don't ever trust them and don't EVER send them nudes.
Oof. Or if you do, at least make sure your head's cropped out.
Preach, girl! Where were you all my life?
Yeah, I wish I had role models like you growing up. Lucky escape!
Oi, Sky, give me your gum, bitch, I'm starving.
Yeah, well, maybe you should get some lunch for once, then, bitch.
It's not my fault the school dinners are gross.
Yeah, mind your own business, lunch police.
What is he doing? Oh, those lads are the worst.
Hey, he smacked me in the head with that football last week and he
didn't even say sorry. Wayne Dwyer, what are you doing?
Stop kicking that ball right now!
You are perfectly aware ball games are prohibited.
Here we go. I SAID stop kicking the ball.
No bother, Miss.
Troubled boy-child looking for attention.
THEY LAUGH Wayne! Give me that ball.
Whoa.
Aw, sorry, Miss!
Did you want a go? You should've said.
Here. BELL RINGS
See you later, ladies.
Please!
THEY CHUCKLE
Girls, it's five to two.
You're going to be late for class.
Imogene Walsh, are you filming?
WHISPERS: Shit.
So, guys, introducing the new me.
What do you guys think? OK, I'll be honest,
I haven't really done much jogging before, but today after school,
I just felt so bloated and gross and I was like, "You know what?
"I'm going to challenge myself and do the whole running thing."
My days of being a giant carb are over.
So, 5K, let's go!
Oh, my...! Oh, my...!
Oh, God.
Oh, my God.
Seriously cannot deal with how red and sweaty I am right now.
This is literally like the first time in my life I've ever gone
jogging. I have such a stitch.
You're doing it. Go girl!
Ooh, I'm starting to think that 5K might be a bit ambitious
for a beginner. Nah, you can do it.
You're going to feel SO good afterwards.
Oh, God, how do people do this for a laugh?
Oh, God, my legs are about to fall off
and I've got blisters on my blisters.
No pain, no gain!
Oh, my God!
We might actually be witnessing marijuana exchanging hands.
Scandal! What are you like?
I'm moving back. Come on.
Oh, God, it's probably a bit weird that I'm filming him.
Maybe I need to stop being such a creep.
It is so rough having to look at your face on the screen.
I already knew I was an ugly crier and now I can add ugly...
Jesus! Mary and Joseph, did I scare you?
Give me that back! And what's this sophisticated piece of technology?
It's just...nothing.
Oh, looks a lot like a camera to me.
No, it's just... Oh, so you weren't filming me, then?
No, no. It's all right, love.
The camera loves me. What!
So, what do we do? OK, wait, wait, stop.
I'll do an intro. So,
here we are with a very exclusive interview with a local legend known
as... Do not call me Demented Dwyer or I'll fucking stab you.
I was going to say Wayne.
I'm only winding you up.
Demented Dwyer is all good, or Waster Wayne,
or the hottest lad at school, whatever floats your boat.
Right, folks? Oh!
OK, so Wayne is here to clear up a few rumours going around.
So, I just wanted to say that whatever you saw on Imogene's
footage earlier, if it looked like I was selling stuff
or, I don't know, whatever,
I just wanted to say that...
I was. I'll do you a great deal, too.
Whatever you need, I'll hook you up. Contact me through Imo.
OK, he's just joking. I swear to God, he's joking.
Say no to drugs, kids. Oh, do do drugs, kids.
Stop! This is my video.
I'm not do anything wrong. Just being a good businessman.
So, I kind of feel like I've failed today.
Don't be so hard on yourself.
You've loads of time to get on track.
I know it sounds stupid, but earlier I was so psyched up for my run
and my new exercise routine and I felt like it was a new chapter
and all that BS.
And I've just been watching back some of the footage of my run
and it really upset me.
Like, obviously it's kind of hilarious how red-faced
and sweaty I am.
Like, I actually look like some kind of horrible chubby tomato attempting
to exercise.
So hopefully you got some kind of entertainment value out of it.
I just don't really like how I look. When you're running marathons,
you're going to watch back those videos,
you won't even recognise yourself.
There's just so many things about myself I need to change.
Well, making a start is the hardest part.
Yeah. Look,
think how good you'll feel when you look in the mirror and you like what
you see. I just don't know if I'll ever get there.
Like, I just want to walk into a room and actually feel like I'm hot.
Hey, don't talk like this.
It just feels like it's so effortless for some people.
Like, there's so many girls at my school with these naturally perfect
bodies and I'm like, oh,
it's not fair.
You can do this.
Trust me.
I don't know.
Mm, delicious water.
Yum!
OK, I've got to keep my voice down or else Mum will murder me.
So, guys, I had a bit of a dip there earlier but I'm feeling way better
now. Like, obviously, I know this journey is going to be hard.
That's the point. I mean, changing your life is hard.
If it was easy, then everyone would do it.
So, yeah, I'm going to bed now and make tomorrow into a fresh start.
I'm going to try to really hard to stay motivated and keep up
the exercise plan.
Good night, everybody!