Hello and welcome to the next lesson “Emotional Mastery 2.” So in Emotional Mastery 1 we
learned about changing our physiology, changing our bodies to change our emotions. Remember
in that less I said there are two ways to change your emotions. Number one is physiology,
we talked about that. There is something else you can change so you can be in a peak emotional
state as you learn English and that is your focus, your mental focus. What you think about
consistently, that will change your emotion also. So what do I mean by mental focus? How
do you change your mental focus? What should you focus on? What should you not focus on?
First, let’s talk about the negative. What should you not focus on? Try to remember when
you were in school in your English classes. What did you focus on when you were in school?
What did you think about, worry about, consistently, frequently? Well probably tests, right? That
was one I always thought about. You probably were focused on tests a lot. “I gotta pass
this test, I gotta pass this test.” Tests, and then grades. “Will I get an A? Will
I get a B? Will I get a C? Will I fail this course?” So you were thinking about judgment,
other people judging you, the teacher judging you, getting a grade, getting a score. How
did you feel about that? When you think about tests, tests, tests a lot and you think a
lot about a score, a grade, A, B, C. Or maybe now you’re thinking about the TOEFL exam
and you’re worried “What number will I get on the TOEFL exam?” How does that affect
your emotions? Do you feel more relaxed or more stressful? Well, most people feel more
stressful, of course. The more you think about judgment, the more you think about a test
score, the more nervous you become, the more worried you become. And that’s not good.
You actually learn more slowly when you’re worried. You learn more slowly when you’re
nervous, when you have anxiety. Again, I’ll talk about Dr. Stephen Krashen, our favorite
researcher. Anxiety is a major part of his research. It is the single number one most
negative factor in language acquisition, in language learning. Anxiety means worry or
stress and there are many, many studies about this. They study different language learners,
study different English learners. And they put them in a situation where they are more
stressed or more worried. And they have others that are in a more relaxed situation. And
the relaxed students always learn better and faster. So let’s say after six months the
relaxed students will have better grammar, better pronunciation, better listening and
understanding, better writing skill, better everything. The anxious students, the worried,
nervous students, the stressed students, of course, have worse pronunciation, worse speaking
ability, less vocabulary, worse writing, less listening comprehension, listening understanding.
So what was happening in school was you were actually learning to fail. You were training
yourself to be stressed and nervous. You were training yourself to focus on things, tests,
grades, teacher’s opinion of you, that make you feel nervous and that nervousness made
you learn more slowly. So you don’t want to focus on that. Something else you don’t
want to focus on. You don’t want to focus on every small step to reach your goal. Your
goal is to speak excellent English, to feel strong and confident when you speak. That’s
a great goal. But what happens if you focus on everything you must do to reach the goal?
For example, you think “Oh god, to become a great speaker that means I’ve got to study
every day. I’ve got to learn 20,000 vocabulary words. I’ve got to listen to 2 or 3,000
hours of English.” How does that make you feel? Probably a little nervous, probably
stressed, right, you think “Oh my god, it’s too much.” So you want to focus on the little
individual steps because it’s going to seem huge, it’s going to seem so big it’s going
to kill your motivation. What else do you not want to focus on? Problems. Problems,
so many students focus on problems. In my classes in San Francisco they come to me “AJ,
my pronunciation is bad. AJ I make grammar mistakes.” Well, of course you do. You’re
a student. You’re learning. It’s normal. You’re going to make mistakes. You’re
going to have problems sometimes. You’re going to make a mistake with your pronunciation.
I do, I’m a native speaker, I’m an English teacher. I make mistakes all the time. It’s
normal. You can’t focus on it. If you focus on it, if you focus on the negative, if you
focus on mistakes, if you focus on problems your emotions become weaker and weaker. You
actually get worse. So you just need to relax about this. Everybody is human. Everybody
makes mistakes. It’s a normal thing. Finally, you do not want to focus on the past. Most
of my students have very negative experiences with English from the past. Most did not enjoy
their English classes in school. When I ask about their past with English “Oh, oh, it
was terrible.” People tell me, students tell me “I’m not good at English. I was
always bad in my English classes. I’ve studied for 6 years, 8 years, 10 years, still I cannot
speak well.” Focused on the past, well the past is not the same as the present. The past
doesn’t equal the future as Tony Robbins likes to say. And it’s true. In the past
you used very old traditional methods that made you feel bad. Sitting in a class still,
not moving, being graded and tested constantly. Studying boring grammar textbooks, that’s
not a method for success for most people. Some people succeed with that but very few.
So the past was different. You’re now learning in a very different way. You are different
now. Don’t focus on the past. Alright, so enough of what not to do. What should you
focus on if you want to be happy, if you want to be excited, if you want to learn very quickly,
faster than before. What should you focus on? What should you think about consistently
all the time? Well number one, instead of focusing on the little steps and all the little
problems, instead focus on the end result. The final result, that’s what you need to
focus on. Focus on your ultimate success. So in other words use your imagination and
see yourself, imagine yourself speaking English fluently, quickly. Imagine yourself smiling
as you speak English with a native speaker. Imagine yourself feeling strong and confident
as you speak English easily, effortlessly. Every day focus on this thought, the end result.
What you will ultimately reach, ultimately achieve, what you will finally do. Focus on
the end result every day, the final result. Do not focus on the little steps you must
take every day. Focus on the final result every day. Second, focus on the purpose, the
reason you are learning English. I mean why? If your purpose is to take the TOEFL exam,
you’re going to be stressed and depressed. Nobody is excited about a test, nobody I know.
That’s not a good emotional thing to focus on. It’s not a good reason to learn English.
Taking a test is a terrible reason because it makes you feel stressed, nervous, tired
and bored. You need bigger, better reasons. Yes, maybe you need to take the TOEFL exam
but why? Why do you want to pass the TOEFL exam? Maybe you want a great job that requires
English, where you can use English in international trade perhaps. Maybe you want to study in
the United States, go to a University in the United States, have a great adventure in another
country. Well that makes you feel good, right, thinking about that? Imagine yourself in New
York City or in San Francisco, meeting native speakers, talking effortlessly, easily. Making
new friends, a great new job with more money, now those are great things to focus on. So
you want to focus on compelling strong reasons why you’re learning English, why it’s
important, the benefits, things that make you feel great. Do not focus on a test, please.
So those are the two things, you focus on the end result and they’re related, they’re
basically the same thing. Number two you focus on the reasons why, the purpose. So you have
to imagine very vividly, very strongly in your head what it is you will finally do.
See the end result. And then feel the emotions. The last step is you want to see the end result
with emotion, let yourself feel that it’s real. So when you focus on speaking great
English, feel the emotions. Feel proud. Feel happy. Feel confident. Smile big. Imagine
how you will feel speaking excellent English. Okay, so let’s review very quickly about
focus. The main thing about focus, it’s very, very simple. You’re going to focus
on the end result, the final result. You want to focus on the thing that makes you feel
great, the situation, the benefits, all the great things that will improve in your life
by speaking excellent English. That’s what you need to focus on every day. Write it down.
Write down, make a list of all the great things that will happen in your life when you speak
excellent English. New friends, maybe? Maybe great new travel experiences. Maybe living
or working abroad. Maybe a better job. I don’t know, you have to make your own list, but
make it a big list. Write down all the great things that will happen in your life and then
every day focus on those. Review those every day. Teach your brain to focus on these positive
inspiring things, not on these negative things, not on problems, not on the past. Okay, so
that is it for this main speech on “Emotional Mastery 2.” Focus. Next let’s listen to
the vocabulary and then we’ll have the mini‐story.