Brainy Dose Presents:
The 10 Types of Loneliness And How To Deal With Them
When we think about loneliness, we tend to think about total isolation.
We envision ourselves sitting in dark corners with nobody to communicate to - which is why
the word itself tends to scare us.
It’s natural to feel lonely when we’ve lost someone or something close to us - such
as a significant other, a family member, or a pet.
It’s also possible to feel lonely even when someone is surrounded by many others.
Whatever the case may be, loneliness is something that most people go through at least once
in their lives.
When it comes to conquering loneliness, it’s important to recognize that defeating it isn’t
solved by merely surrounding yourself with others.
It may be easy for some to gather a rather large group of friends, but what’s most
important is being able to connect with them on a real and emotional level.
Human beings were made with the desire to find security and safety, which is why establishing
deep connections with others becomes such a big part of our lives.
We can make these relationships stronger by working on our connection skills with our
friends and partners - or even speaking with a therapist.
Without the much needed feeling of understandable connection to others, we start to feel rather
lonely.
And as that loneliness begins to grow inside of us - due to our lack of understanding - it
can take a toll on our mental stability.
That’s why learning about the different types of loneliness and how they can affect
you is important.
Number 1 - Post-Breakup Loneliness
Relationships are an important aspect of everyone’s life.
When our relationships with others come to an end, and we no longer see them as often
as we used to, we feel an exceedingly strong sense of loneliness that we find ourselves
dwelling over.
Scientists have even uncovered data that links the symptoms of drug withdrawal to similar
feelings we get when our relationships end.
Although that’s a very extreme piece of information to take into consideration, there
are ways to get over these feelings.
One way to help yourself learn how to heal more efficiently is by remembering that none
of these feelings will last forever, and time itself will help ease the pain.
As time passes by, practice releasing yourself back into society and involving yourself in
more activities.
As long as you’re not spending your time dwelling over the lost connection, you’ll
be able to overcome the pain much faster.
Keeping yourself busy and focusing on projects or other things to do with your time will
also help you get over your feeling of loneliness quicker.
Taking time out of your schedule to do exciting and healthy things will distract you from
your rather depressing inner monologue.
Even if you feel worse than you ever have before, remember not to completely isolate
yourself - since that will only give your mind a bigger platform to spread the lonely
feelings, and ultimately make you feel worse.
Talking to other people about how your feeling may seem like a frightening idea, but it always
provides you with a healthy outlet.
And just because you’ve lost one deep connection, doesn’t mean you have to push away the connections
you have with others as well.
It is okay to reach out to family and friends if you need support.
Don’t let yourself become even more isolated and alone.
Number 2 - Transitional Loneliness
Experiencing rather serious changes in our lives can stress us out and trick our minds
into creating a false sense of loneliness, even if the life changes are positive ones.
Consider moving.
Maybe you are moving from a small southern suburb to a large city where you have no connections
with anybody.
The vast space and countless unknown individuals are enough to create a major overwhelming
feeling of loneliness.
Lots of people encounter this challenge, especially when they spend so much of their free time
trying to adjust to the changes.
Although this may seem like a rather serious problem, it’s important to acknowledge your
feelings of isolation and to realize that they are almost always temporary.
Number 3 - Caregiver Loneliness
It’s not uncommon for individuals to find themselves responsible for the care of another
person.
Although it’s typically young adults who end up caring for their elder family members,
other situations include individuals having to care for sick siblings and disabled friends
or partners.
Spending most of your time caring for another person can put a lot of stress on your mind
and make you feel very isolated.
Over time, you may begin to feel as if nobody is appreciating your effort to care for someone.
You may begin feeling upset due to the fact that you’re not receiving the emotional
or physical support you need - all because your time and effort is going into caring
for another.
Although you are spending your time making sure whoever you’re caring for is okay,
it is very important to remember that you must never forget about yourself and how you’re
feeling.
Realizing that this type of loneliness exists and isn’t very rare, can open doors to finding
yourself support for your feelings - and giving yourself a chance to talk about the situation,
without judgment.
Joining a support group is a great way to take advantage of the healthy and advantageous
outlets in your society.
Being able to communicate with others who have gone through similar experiences to yours
can help you find meaningful ways to cope with your feelings.
You can even find online support groups and send direct messages to other individuals
who have gone through what you’re going through.
Number 4 - Loneliness Within Friendships
As we grow older, our friendships tend to come and go.
Maybe some of the very close ones will stay, but a lot of our friendships will gradually
dissolve as our lives change.
But what many people don’t know, is that a lot of individuals experience loneliness
within their friendships.
Some of us have lots of friends but still find ourselves feeling overwhelmingly lonely.
To understand loneliness within friendships, you must first understand that there are different
types of friendships.
There are colleagues, acquaintances, friends, close friends, and best friends or significant
others.
If you are someone who is mostly surrounded by colleagues or acquaintances, then you’re
more likely to experience feelings of loneliness - due to the fact that you can’t truly confide
in these superficial friendships.
If you’re surrounding yourself with friendships like these - lacking the emotional connection
we all crave - then you must either work to establish that connection with those individuals;
or make new friends who will be easier for you to confide in.
It’s important for everyone to have at least one person that they can trust enough to talk
to about their problems.
Number 5 - Lack of Family Support
Lacking important family connections can impact your mental stability in a rather negative
way.
When you lose contact with your family or stop communicating with each other, it can
take a serious toll on you and cause you to feel an extreme sense of loneliness.
Although many people are able to maintain a strong connection with their families, there
are those who find it rather hard to do so.
They may also deal with seasonal depression due to the fact that they aren’t able to
spend holidays with their family – as family connection is largely emphasized during holiday
seasons.
If you don’t have the best communication with your family members, you must remember
that you’re not meant to be alone forever because of it.
Get involved in your community to create connections with others and maybe even start a family
of your own.
Number 6 - Loneliness Caused By Social Media
Although social media was invented as a way to bring people together, it often causes
an exceedingly deep feeling of loneliness and isolation in many individuals.
Spending fair amounts of your time on social media is enough to overwhelm your brain and
make you feel lonely.
Not to mention, seeing the details of other people’s lives and how they are doing may
cause you to feel sad if you don’t have the same exciting opportunities they
do.
But, social media isn’t always reality.
In fact, many people who have large followings on social media made it there by posting fake
content that tricks you into feeling a false sense of happiness.
Of course, social media is incredible…
But if anything, it should be helping to make you feel better, not adding onto what makes
you feel worse.
So, limit the time you spend on social media and invest more of that time into working on your
bonds with others.
Number 7 - Work Loneliness
Although work environments are created to be professional ones, lacking even basic connections
with your coworkers can make the work week feel very lonely, and sometimes depressing.
If you don’t establish connections with the individuals you work with, the work week
will indeed feel very long and wearing.
If you struggle with getting to know your work colleagues, try asking one of them to
join you during your lunch break.
You can also offer to make a coworker coffee if you’re already on your way to get one
for yourself.
In order to establish connections with others, you sometimes have to be willing to make the
first move.
If you work from home, establishing these types of connections can seem relatively impossible.
But you can join an organization that supports networking and communication with others in
your field of work.
And don’t forget to keep up with your family and friends as well, outside of work.
Number 8 - Loneliness In A Relationship
Although we envision our relationships with people who are easy to connect with, it’s
common for us to find ourselves in relationships with individuals who lack the effort to form
a connection with us.
Situations like this can cause us to feel extremely isolated and alone - but they are
also fixable.
Relationships often begin to lose strong connections due to pressure from outside forces.
You can fix this by making your relationship and the connection with your partner a priority.
Try setting firm boundaries with work and other various obligations so you can spend
more time focusing on how to meet each other’s needs.
If you have been experiencing loneliness in your relationship, try talking to your significant
other about these feelings.
Let them know how you feel in the relationship and try to talk about how you could establish
a stronger connection.
Number 9 - New Baby Loneliness
Many people associate taking care of a newborn with extreme lack of sleep and energy deprivation
due the constant needs of the baby.
Not many can see how the start of raising a child can also cause feelings of loneliness
or isolation, but it does happen quite frequently.
Lots of new parents feel incredibly happy and excited when they get the chance to start
their own family; but others feel stressed and isolated due to the fact that they feel
as though they’re doing everything on their own.
Many parents come across these feelings when they spend large amounts of time alone in
their homes with the new baby.
They begin spending so much less time outside of the house or with friends and family that
they start to feel increasingly lonely.
Although becoming a parent is basically a full-time job - and your baby is of course
your main priority as a parent - you must remember to try and make time to go out every
once in a while.
Your social life and close friendships are still incredibly important.
So stay in touch with your friends and family - and be sure to remind yourself that you
are not alone.
Number 10 - Lack Of A Pet Loneliness
Many people have a deep need to connect with animals.
They often feel like their lives are incomplete or missing something important if they don’t
have a pet.
If this describes you, but you can’t have a pet for some reason (such as your apartment
complex not allowing you to have one, or a loved one having a pet allergy) - you can
fill this seemingly empty hole by:
- volunteering at a local animal shelter
- offering to take care of other people’s pets
- or doing what you can to help animals in your neighborhood - like setting out bird
feeders or water for neighborhood dogs and cats.
The truth is, everybody experiences loneliness, and we all feel lonely and isolated for different
reasons.
The way we interpret these feelings of loneliness and isolation and how we deal with them varies
widely.
Even very small events can set off a bombarding avalanche of solitude in somebody’s mind
and cause them to feel very lonely and down.
There are countless things that can trigger us to feel these bouts of loneliness or isolation
- from exhaustion to sad songs you may hear over the radio.
Some individuals experience feelings of loneliness or isolation more often than others, but that
usually depends on what they’ve gone through and the things they may deal with on a daily
basis.
After you’ve learned how to recognize the different types of loneliness and how they
may affect you, it will become easier to learn how to cope with them and keep yourself from
feeling too alone.
Remember, loneliness is a state of mind, and it doesn’t have to be permanent - unless
you allow it to be.
Well, that’s it for this one.
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