When you ask someone or you're asked like
what's your passion? it's triggering.
it's like : “Oh my God, I have to come up with a good answer for this”.
But that's the fear isn't it?
That when someone asks you at a party, on a date,
at a job interview, what are you passionate about?
That you're not going to have this wow compelling answer,
and that that means you're not interesting, or ambitious,
or that you don't have a singular obsession, or a scary talent that you're hiding,
and that your life isn't is worth living and that's not true.
But this idea that I had to know what I was supposed to do now
that I'm supposed to pursue this passion.
It just bugged me.
It always had.
And that's because there's a dangerously limiting idea
at the heart of everything we believe about success and life in general.
And it's that you have one singular passion and your job is to find it
and to pursue it to the exclusion of all else.
And if you do that everything will fall into place.
And if you don't, you've failed.
The pressure starts really young, and it goes your whole life
but it's perhaps most pronounced when you're graduating from school, right?
Everyone says : “wow the world's at your feet”.
“What are you going to do now?”
It's so intimidating.
It's like picking a major for life.
Anyway I was such a mess when I was in my 20s,
such a mess.
I was anxious and depressed and I had no life to speak of.
I was temping to keep my options open, but I called my mother every night crying
and I was turning away perfectly good full time jobs, why?
Because I was afraid.
I was sure that I would pick the wrong one, and get on the wrong train
headed to the wrong future.
And so I took a full time job as an assistant
at a management consulting firm where I knew nothing about nothing.
OK.
Zero.
Except I knew I had a reason to get up in the morning,
get showered, leave the house and people who were waiting for me when I
got there, and I got a paycheck every two weeks
and that is as good a reason to take a job as any.
Did I know that I wanted to be an office administrator for the rest of my life?
No I had no idea.
Truly.
But this idea that everything you supposed to do
should fit into this passion vertical is unrealistic.
And I'll say it, elitist.
You show me someone who washes windows for a living
and I will bet you a million dollars is not because he has a passion for clean
glass.
Passion is not a job, a sport or a hobby.
It is the full force of your attention and energy that you give to
whatever is right in front of you.
And if you're so busy looking for this passion
you could miss opportunities that change your life.
You could also miss out on great love.
Because that's what happens when you have tunnel vision
trying to find “the one”.
We all think we know the kind of person we are
and the kind of person we could love, but sometimes we're wrong,
blissfully wrong.
And sometimes you don’t know what you're going to do next
right?
I mean, I don’t.
I love not knowing what I'm gonna be doing five years from now
or what I'll be into.
And that's OK.
It's ok not to know.
You know why?
Because the most fulfilling relationships, the most fulfilling careers
are those that still have the power to surprise you.
And as for the things you know you want to do,
you want to write a book, you want to start a business,
you want to change careers, great.
But if you're sitting around waiting for passion to show up and take it
you're going to be waiting a long time.
So don't wait.
Instead spend your time and attention solving your favorite problems.
Look for problems that need solving.
Be useful, generous.
People will thank you, and hug you and pay you for it
and that's where passion is.
Where your energy and effort meet someone else's need.
That's when you realize, passion lives
in realizing what you have to contribute.
Why do you think when you ask people what they are passionate about
they say helping other people?
So don't wait, just start doing.
Because to live a life full of meaning and value,
you don't follow your passion, your passion follows you.