- How do the 16 personalities differ
in their communication styles,
you know, specifically.
I know there's a lot of NF types in the audience,
INFJs, INFPs, ENFPs ENFJs.
How is their communication different from the other types?
And the real key here are those two letters in the middle,
the NF, ST, NT, SF.
That's where the key to their communication is,
because that gives you what are their preferences
for perceiving the world and reality,
and then what is their preferred way of judging it?
So that's a important thing to point out is that it's not,
like, if you are a certain type,
you don't always communicate in one way all the time.
'Cause an NF type can communicate in an ST way,
even though it's the opposite of our preferences.
We can do it all.
It's just more often than not,
we prefer one way of communicating over the other.
So let me go through each
of those two middle letter combinations and kind of explain
what you would expect from someone who is that type,
how they will communicate.
Let's start with ST
'cause I think that's, in many ways,
the easiest one to understand.
S being sensing, T being thinking.
And if you want to watch a quick introduction
on what the letters mean, the four letters,
click this card right here.
It's a four minute video.
I pump up the energy,
it's one of my best,
if I do say so myself.
So ST, sensing, thinking.
What are the facts?
How does it all make sense?
How does it all work?
For instance, if you had someone
who was writing a manual for something that you had to use,
an instruction manual,
you want it to be ST.
You want it to be clear.
What is happening?
Like, what am I looking at in front of me?
What are the different parts of this desk I bought?
And then how does it work?
How do I get it all together?
How do I make happen what I want to happen?
ST, clear.
Okay, then we go to SF.
This is a bit of a different one.
So it's still dealing with what is really happening,
what are the facts,
what is in the real world,
the concrete world around us,
but then we're not looking at how does it work logically,
we're looking at how do people value it?
What's the feeling behind it?
Feeling isn't just emotion,
when we're talking about the 16 personalities,
although emotion is part of it.
It's how we judge things based on value.
Is a good or bad, do we like it or not like it?
Which is, for the most part, irrational.
Like how we value things is not necessarily tied to logic.
You would expect SF kind of talk reviews for movies,
et cetera, for a music,
people who are on the shows,
talking about what's happening in Hollywood,
'cause it's like, what's actually happening.
And then do people like this?
Do people think it's a good idea?
Was this thing that this movie, was it any good?
That's SF talk.
It's talking about what are the people gonna like?
What do I like?
And what is it actually,
we're not trying to read into it very far.
Then we get to NT talk,
which is maybe one of
the hardest kinds of talk to understand
because we're not talking about the sensory anymore,
because in stands for intuition,
which is looking beyond the facts,
looking beyond the concrete world,
into the meanings,
into the connections between the facts,
it's like trying to put together a pattern
or a concept based on the facts.
And it's trying to guess ahead,
like trying to jump over every individual fact
and be like this is what it all means.
This is where it's all going.
That's intuition.
When you pair it with thinking,
which is the logic, how does it work?
You get the kind of communication that is all about,
like, how do the underlying things about life,
like intuitive,
like having to have a hard time explaining it.
The intuitive stuff about life,
all the patterns we see in the world,
how does that all work?
How do we get results from it?
So, you know, a lot of philosophy can be NT talk.
And of course, a lot of science,
especially when it's, you know,
maybe more about psychology, et cetera,
where it's not so much focused on the facts and the figures,
but focused on more,
like what does it all mean in general,
that's more NT talk.
So then we get to NF talk.
Intuitive feeling talk.
So we've already gone over both of those things
but just to kind of reiterate,
we're talking about the abstract stuff,
not concrete facts mixed with how do people value it?
How do people feel?
So you can see how this is like the least clear,
the least useful way of talking.
So if you are an NF type,
you might feel like you've been talking
past everyone your whole life.
And like very few people understand you
and the world is not really geared towards NF communication.
Like the kind of examples generally
that you would hear of NF talk
are like self-help stuff where it's like,
here are our patterns.
Here's what's happening under the surface
of all your actions
and then here's how we can work together
to make yourself happier,
you know, to make yourself feel better.
Or if you look at theology, for example,
religion is talking about a bunch of things
that are not necessarily in physical reality,
the facts, you know, we're talking about the spiritual realm
and then mixing it with,
how does this make our life better?
It's not necessarily how do we get something done
but it's like,
how do we feel good?
How do we reach a place that we value in our life?
So NF talk on a day-to-day basis,
might not be the greatest thing
especially because it doesn't,
like it's difficult for NF speakers
to give concrete examples
and to make logical sense a lot of times.
Like you can do it,
but it takes more effort.
Like we're really just going for an emotional reaction.
You know, we're talking about the emotions
and in an abstract way.
Unclear, difficult to understand.
So if you are an NF type and you find that you're,
you know, a lot of people don't get what you say,
try to take a step back and maybe concentrate a bit more
on working on the ST,
the sensing thinking kind of communication.
And it's interesting because when you realize
that people act like open your eyes up to this,
people communicate in different ways.
And once you listen for it,
you really start to hear it.
And it's why people have so much issue.
So many issues communicating with each other
'cause they're talking past each other
because they prefer to look at the way
and look at the world
and judge the world in different ways.
If you have an NF person talking to an ST person,
they're gonna be like,
why are you talking and all this abstract stuff,
what's the point?
Give me some facts, give me some examples.
And I don't care how people feel,
let's just make sure stuff works,
because if it works
then everyone's gonna feel good.
You know what I mean?
Whereas the NF types are like,
I don't care if it works,
we need to make sure people feel good
and we don't need to worry about the facts.
We just need to worry about generally,
like what it all means, you know?
So you can see how they're like both looking at reality,
both trying to make decisions
but they're going about it in different ways.
They prefer to do it in different ways.
It's very important to be aware of that.
And especially when you go
into different situations in life,
you know, go into a job interview or,
you know, talk,
having a difficult conversation with a loved one,
to go into it realizing that
there are certain modes of communication
that are more appropriate in those circumstances
than maybe your preferred one.
So going to a job interview,
you might wanna default to a more ST or NT kind of talking.
Whereas if you are going into a situation
where you're trying to,
you know, talk to your your girlfriend or boyfriend
about your future or whatever,
maybe you go to a more NF kind of communication.
It really depends.
So just keep that in mind.
Thanks for watching.
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