So if you are an ENFP there's a very
good chance that you have the tendency
let's say the habit of changing
direction and not necessarily
acknowledging your change in direction
doing this way too often often this is
called shiny object syndrome right you
start on something when you see
something that looks better or maybe
this wasn't as easy as you thought it
was you change the next thing and the
next thing but what Sen FPS do that's a
little different than a lot of other
people is we don't really acknowledge
we're quitting or we're changing
directions we do it all very suddenly
and we just the way our minds basically
process things we gradually change and
we kind of think that we're doing what
we plan to do but if you look back six
months or a year you realize that you've
got totally off course and you're not
really doing what you meant to be doing
now the problem with this i made other
videos on dabbling in the dangers of
dabbling is that it really eats away
your chances of success and the reason
is that we're out there competing in a
world of INTJs of infj the people who
are pretty focused and dialed in and
what they're doing and consistent and so
here we are changing directions every
few weeks every few minutes every few
months whatever it is
how are we going to compete with other
people who are basically focused in
doing one thing now I know why this has
been such a challenge for me in the past
and it's really because we get excited
about stuff we like newness is enfps we
like things that are novel we like
variety we like new challenges that
first part of a project is a lot more
exciting than the end part right the
little details and so what that ends up
doing is it ends up pulling us into all
these different things that if we don't
have the right systems in place maybe
have the right outlook ends up spending
a lot of time starting things and never
really getting a lot accomplished i'm
sure if you were to search for like ENFP
blogs you're going to find the highest
number of blogs started and not finished
if any and he grew up on the internet
and that's again
as we like this starting but I want to
go through some things that have really
helped me learn to finish things and
you're new to my channel if you haven't
watched my videos are you don't know my
story I well I started out doing a bunch
of different entrepreneurial things when
I came out of school and most recently
was working as a freelancer i use
freelancing to help me travel the world
I lived in I guess this country number 7
now I've lived in and I along the way
started writing books i published about
11-12 there's one I don't really want to
count so if they have published 11 books
at this point I built the coaching
practice i have online training courses
and that so I figured out how to finish
things and follow through and despite
probably hearing the advice that you got
to get a partner to do what you need to
have your someone else to be the
finisher that is good advice but I've
done it without having that partner
figuring out to do it myself
the first thing that really helped me
figure this out was changing my
perception of time and so if you study
NLP or you're familiar with tony robbins
i did my coaching training with him and
he has a concept of time basically and
how we all have different perceptions of
time for some people
a minute is a long time for other people
a week is nothing a year is nothing you
know you have people you meet and if
you're an ENFP this probably isn't you
who had the same job for 10 years 20
years and to them I years nothing I have
a friend who's very much like this where
we talk about trip planning you know I'm
like oh we're going to come visit me in
Europe and he's planning two years ahead
like it's 2016 now he's talking about
2018 we might plan a trip i plan my trip
like a month in advance maybe maybe 24
something big and you know so we have
different perceptions of time and how
long something is an ENFP as we tend to
have a mergency in our behavior right
where we like to do things quickly we
want results now and that is good in
many ways as part of our strength part
of what allows us to really drive
projects and initiating there's other
personality types who will take a year
to start their business
an ENFP might started in a week on a
hunt right and just go for which is
awesome
the problem is is this perception that
things should be quick often leads us to
not really stay the course and changes
sort of our sense of success so for
three months into something or six
months into something we start to think
oh yeah we fail this isn't working
because we haven't got the kind of
results we have expected because we're
optimists where I deal is we expect good
things to happen and so because of this
we end up changing her mind or sinking
okay this isn't work let's try something
different and the reality is that
especially in the new world now in terms
of the internet things take a long time
now you might think this is a
contradiction right isn't the internet
about making these quick and easy
the internet is about making kind of
consumers and quick and easy but if you
want to be successful in a lot of things
like you want to build a youtube channel
or a blog or some kind of successful
take a podcast where you stand out to
people it takes a long time to break
through that noise because you know if
you're living in a small town and you
start doing public speaking well you're
probably the only person doing public
speaking so it's pretty easy to get a
following right away if you come on
youtube and you start making videos
it might be a year before you get any
real traction because there's so many
people and you're competing with the
whole world and so there's something
that I learned around this topic that
really helped me get stuck with me
it's something i have in my email like I
have this tree email course I teach that
I have a whole email around it is its
element in motorcycle school so I went
to this really cool school for getting
my motorcycle license where they used
all these military analogies and all
this stuff and it was that
slow is smooth and smooth is fast so we
know people and they said especially
guys are really bad with this we have
this urgency and when you're riding a
motorbike you try to like force it and
that's not the right way that makes a
terrible writer and that really slow
subtle movement make you smooth and by
being smooth you're actually fast so if
you look at the best racers that the
people who are the fastest they're
actually the people who have slow smooth
movements and so I start applying this
to thinking about my life is that rather
than thinking about one week at a time
you know like these short things I need
successfully success thinking
longer-term and having more of a
drawn-out goal
ok year out and realizing that it will
take time to get there
I have some friends have done very well
in terms of like i'll use YouTube
because we're on youtube in terms of
their YouTube channels and getting a lot
of success and what's been cool as I've
watched them from the beginning and put
in months and months of work with no
results and just keep going and I know
if that was me I would quit right i
would think all this YouTube thing is
not working and I've actually done that
in the past where i put up some videos
and sort of quit and not really done
anything with it and it was seen how
much work actually needs to go into
succeed would change my sense of time
which is help me basically be more
patient and have a longer timeframe and
so in terms of applying this the first
thing is just to actively think about it
I noticed you may be lame advice but
just start processing that way of
thinking you know k slow is smooth
smooth is fast and thinking that ok
really i don't need to be successful or
achieve whatever it is you're trying to
achieve in a month you know if it
happened in six months or a year or two
years that would be pretty good and so
kind of focusing on that longer-term and
just keep it in my it takes time to get
there and reminding yourself of that so
if you spend a week working really hard
on something and you don't get any
results
you're not going to be as disappointed
because you're
coming in with the mental frame that
this is going to be hard and when you
come in with that mental frame you're
not as disappointed
it's just you know high expectations /
optimistic views lead to huge
disappointment lead to quitting so if
you can reframe that and think okay
in a way it's actually more optimistic
because what you're thinking is ok if i
put in a year of hard work i know it
will be successful so i'm going to put
in that time and I'm not going to change
my emotions and react to every bad day
or or negative event that happened i'm
going to more focus on the long-term the
bigger picture one thing that can help
with this is having some form of
accountability in terms of your goals
and your planning i mentioned this
earlier in the video enfps we are very
good at basically lying to herself BS in
ourselves about why we're changing
directions
I've talked about in other videos the
aspect of like lying to ourselves about
eating dark chocolate or drinking a
bottle of wine like all those
antioxidants it's good for us but you
really just want to drink the wine right
but you find ways to justify it in FPS
are masters of doing this with
everything if we want to change
direction we can always find a way to do
it even if it's not the right thing to
do
so if we commit to starting a business
we start working on it working on it and
something bad happens that makes us feel
bad and we just emotionally want to quit
we can find a dozen ways to justify that
only the economy changed oh I had this
job offer this is whatever but really
we're changing our minds or quitting we
let ourselves down and so I would
encourage you to set kind of concrete
destinations you could call them gold
you call destinations like where you
want to get to what you want to do and
when you set that write it down and
maybe share it with some people and hold
yourself to that say this is where I
want to go if I start to lie to myself
and change direction and say wait maybe
I should go here instead maybe I should
do this just being aware that that is a
lie right you're lying to yourself about
it and you're letting your emotions kind
of take over and so whatever you write
down
I also encourage you not to do it on a
whim the way I CFPB's tend to do so
write down your your destination and
then let it sit for a week kind of think
about it really commit to it and in
committing to it
commit to it right so if you just
scribble something down on a piece of
paper one day on a win
you're probably not that likely to
really commit to it and stick to it
because you just emotionally made that
decision so try to make something really
concrete and then stick with that and
that's going to help a lot with actually
changing your perception of time and
just staying on course with it
ok so back to this perception of time
right
one of the things that happens with
enfps with our sense of urgency with our
desire to make things happen quick and
this is what I've seen in my own life
and I've seen it i coached enfps at work
within FPS 11 is a business coach and
stuff which is really interesting
because you see your own bad habits in
them and it makes it so clear and as
probably really helped me as much as in
some ways help the client so when you
try to go in these little Springs what
can happen if you don't have a unified
kind of vision of where you're going to
is that you'll go this way and then that
way and then this way and that way and
then back this way and you kind of end
up back where you started and I got
clarity with this with myself when i SAT
back and looked at a couple years of my
business where i was busy and I didn't
achieve some things I did grow you know
the business in some ways but I look
back and realize it because i kept
changing directions in terms of like my
marketing strategy in different aspects
of where i wanted to focus the business
I don't really get that much done that
at the end of say two years I look back
and I really kind of mapped out like
what that actually do and it wasn't come
on focus back on the face autofocus it
wasn't actually that impressive in terms
of what i was able to do because i kept
changing directions and every time you
change direction you reset your progress
at least to some extent
not fully and so by doing sort of a
three-month Sprint let's try this
marketing approach okay i don't really
follow their let's try this
nothing really comes of it and that kind
of kicked me in the ass where I just
realized that I'd in some ways wasted
all this time because i didn't just
focus in one area and just keep going
and that was a wake-up call kind of a
shock to my system which really helped
solidify this so keep that in mind is if
you kind of zigzag you keep changing
directions you do sprints and they're
not part of a unified vision like
something you're trying to move towards
that you may find yourself in the same
place a couple years from now and maybe
if you look back now over the last
couple years that might you know
resonate with you where you realize that
you've been doing the same thing that I
was doing so one last little tip and
then when the video here and that's just
that you are an ENFP and you have this
need for variety you know the ENFP way
right where you want excitement you like
newness maybe find other ways to meet it
aside from your career or your business
so whether that's playing extreme sports
are going traveling more or whatever it
is for you that will give you excitement
when you meet that need for excitement
in other places you might not need it in
your business so or career whatever I
talk about business because it's kind of
my world but this applies for all areas
of of your life really
if you don't intentionally proactively
meet your need for excitement and for
newness newness is important for us
right we like novelty new thing if
you're not meeting that need in some way
then you'll unconsciously meet it
through probably more destructive ways
right so you can choose to do things
that are novel that will bring
´excitement´ and be in charge or you
can leave it to your unconscious your
ENFP need for excitement and then you'll
end up doing things that could be
damaging self-sabotage like getting big
fights with your partner or always
switching who you're dating or changing
your business direction all the time
because you need that newness and you're
not meeting that need elsewhere so I
really encourage you to proactively meet
that need for newness rather than just
let it happen to you
cool awesome thanks for bearing with me
for this video
here and that you've enjoyed it you know
subscribe like the video leave a comment
especially I think if you are an ENFP
I'd love to hear your story you know
does this resonate with you have you
been through this you know I've as I
said I coach some enfps and I'm one
myself and I'm fairly a self-reflective
guy but i'd love to learn more and kind
of if you if you've had the same
experience and that kind of thing it
would be great to share it with with all
of us here
cool thanks for watching see you in
another video