I just have a call to action here.
We actually got to do Season One of Glow Up,
and, sorry to this man.
Sorry, you became an overnight celebrity.
When I was on tour,
people were coming to my meet and greets dressed
as this person.
He's probably doing bookings
at pride events at this point.
We don't even know his name.
That's how famous he is.
Hi, it's me, Trixie Mattel.
And I am Katya.
And we are two queens who like to watch.
And today, we could not be more thrilled
to watch Season Two of, Glow Up.
The most iconic British makeup contest,
reality show in the history of broadcast television.
The Glow Up is officially
the UK's most valuable export.
You name it, this show's got it:
Cheeks, nose.
Play dough,
Lips, hair.
Ding dong.
Highlights, low lights.
Confusing references.
Inflated lips, and egos.
Spoilers ahead.
We are going to intimately talk about the details
of the program so la, la, la, la or, keep watching.
The look for today,
it's a story about a girl who's gone to Coachella-
So, "basic white (beep)."
Girl, that face.
We got to break it down.
She brought the cheeks.
She brought the skin, the lips, the brows, the lashes.
You better work you (beeps).
We're going to start with-
I love that this is
a technical look for these people.
I'm sorry.
Like, this is just one eye shadow.
I know.
"We have to blend out a soft purple."
Pigment colors are added to accent the eyes.
Oh that's pretty.
I'm a hater.
I take it back.
And there you go.
Done.
Do you like that?
When a guy has that?
Hate it.
Oh, I have been with a guy with that mustache though
and it's called handlebars
'cause mama, I held on for dear life.
Makeup as a whole,
I've got a little gal, Darcy, who is almost one.
I have to keep telling myself
in this competition,
"I am not mum."
I love that she says I have to concentrate
on "not being mum."
Like, "I have to remember,
I can't breastfeed the other contestants."
- Did you see that? - Oh!
- Oh! - They're both me!
Oh my God.
Go back.
Wow.
That is so crazy.
- That has to be Trixie-inspired. - It's me.
Last night I took an edible to go to sleep,
but I couldn't sleep because I couldn't stop laughing
alone in my house.
I was deadass in bed under the covers going like...
Like in the dark, to nothing.
I wish I could wake up laughing.
You know, you're sleeping and you're just like...
and then just gettin' your day started.
Like a psychopath.
Just like...
This is not new to me, whatsoever, yeah.
When you enter a competition,
don't tell anyone what you're good at.
Exactly.
Confidence is something you never show ever.
They're here to (beep) you up,
because you know what?
We all like to see somebody
who's confident, fall on their ass.
Yes.
Oh, I'm sorry no moisturizer
and I'm allergic to foundation.
No, cut the camera's deadass.
"I'm allergic to foundation."
Why are you here?
Why are you a model?
I would have deadass,
got in her face and said,
"It looks like you're going to have a really bad rash
tomorrow because I'm about to
(beep) dip you in full coverage liquid.
and you need to shut the (beep) up
because I'm here to win."
My mother has acne-prone skin.
Acne-prone, not allergic.
Maybe this is me being controversial yet
where I, once again, but if you're not going
to come to the makeup show and put makeup on,
what are you doing here?
Are you a camera operator?
Why don't they smile anymore.
I miss the nineties when the model would smile.
Like Victoria's Secret, they always smile.
Heather they always smile.
Oh, yeah.
Drag Queens, when they walk,
are always like, are fully doing a wave.
"Oh my God, Nancy."
"Hey, Tim."
It's like, Tyra always tells that story about,
"I got discovered at the airport."
What she doesn't say is that she was also walking through
the airport like...
I know.
Well, Jerry Hall,
she got discovered in France.
She's like, "I went outside and this man asked,
'Would you like to be model?'
And I said, 'yes'."
Relatable content.
We're home.
The judges have to decides who performed best
at London Fashion Week.
Not the eyeballs on the blazer.
Don't let anybody judge you who has (beep)
glue-on wiggly eyes on their blazer.
We have Shanice.
I don't know what they're going to say about it.
I just think it lacks the depth.
Like if she would've gone deeper on the lid,
smokier on the lash line.
There's no dimension or gradient.
It's not good enough.
It's not.
James.
Oh, that sucks too.
It looks a bit bruisey
and we wanted bougie.
"I don't see a lot of creativity
and I don't see any technical precision."
Maybe I'm not, I'm just not sympathetic enough
because on Drag Race,
we have to do so much.
No (beep).
I gotta make sure now that I
know this one because the pressure is on.
In a dramatic turn of events,
they expected you to do makeup.
I'm going to turn you into like,
this David Bowie inspired thing.
But she isn't the only one
channeling the Starman.
Ooh, that is so hard when two people
are doing the same inspiration,
because one of you will
be better than the other, ultimately.
The model that he's got in the chair,
his bone structure's incredible.
I have a twitch that is quite-
You cannot imagine how much
a tick or a twitch like that
would make makeup application more difficult.
If he does good on that makeup too,
it's like, "he (beep) played it.
What's your excuse?"
My icon's my sister.
Do you know what you can say about gay people?
What?
We know exactly who we are.
And we don't give a (beep).
I bet you 100% he does drag.
Makeup done.
- I'm nervous that they- - Oh, no.
They all do makeup too slowly.
Oh no.
Oh, this is not a good sign.
When you have to redo the brows.
That is...
Honestly, there is no way
to not just start from the beginning.
That's the first step.
What's your makeup tip?
How 'bout this?
If you're doing your makeup
but your breath smells like the cat's ass,
where are your priorities?
If you do your makeup
but you don't put on perfume,
you are a hog of death.
Hanna has started work...
Cool.
That's lookin' really interesting.
And the purpose of using clay
is to get a cracked texture on the skin.
I have got a hairdryer with me.
She's doing a hairdryer technique with real clay
to get the texture of the girl's skin to crack like earth.
I don't even need to do that.
I just wake up and that's like my skin.
Like Hannah,
Brandon is also using clay.
And I want the idea that when she was in a rough space,
she's always been...
No, your makeup sucks
- and you're making up a story. - Yeah.
- We don't do metaphors. - Just say what it is.
Yeah, metaphors can't cover up bad technique.
That guitar sucks.
I was just going to say,
are we at a children's birthday party?
In the words of Jasmine Masters,
"No, ma'am."
This is a technique that-
She's working in negative space.
That is so interesting.
What a great idea for inspiration.
If she's doing it using a black shadow
and a makeup wipe,
she's also like...
"Have fun pinning a guitar on someone."
Yeah.
"I'm going to go get some lunch
and I'll meet you guys back when you're done."
For her Moulin-inspired dragon mask...
Oh, okay.
I'm thinking I might be on board with that.
It's a little crafty.
It looks like earplugs.
It does, yeah the,
it does look like earplugs.
It looks like earplugs.
Plasticine, porcupine, forehead realness.
"Plasticine, porcupine, forehead realness."
You know what, I got to say Trixie, you know
who would be the best?
We should do a challenge on this show.
Your makeup.
No, seriously.
It's not easy.
- It'd be a disaster. - It's hard.
I know.
It's way harder than people think it is.
When you tried to do it,
weren't you disarmed by how hard it was?
Yeah, I was like,
I know this is going to be tough because I have like,
a long angular face.
And I'm a fat (beep).
Yeah.
You're a huge fat fatty face.
Yeah, no.
It is so difficult to translate onto a different canvas.
It's a lot of like,
"this" lines up with "this,"
lines up with the eye.
It's a lot of geometry-related.
So when one feature's off,
the whole thing is off.
Would you agree with me
if I said that your makeup was like a mathematical formula
and mine is like a beautiful poem?
Yeah.
Your face is a poem
by Edgar Allen Poe.
Just under a half hour.
Now, when you do your eyes,
do you do one full eye and then the next full eye
or do you go back and forth?
Back and forth.
Otherwise you will never want to do that other eye.
- Cool. - Oooh.
Oh, that's the other Bowie.
Oh, you are (beep).
You are so (beep).
'Cause that other Bowie is so good.
This Ronald McDonald?
MUAs, your time is up.
So this next piece here is the judges giving the feedback.
Which, I can't wait.
We're going to start with Ophelia.
That's really cool.
It's a beautiful job.
A little bit hungry energy.
Whoa.
That's great.
I think that's good.
I wish she would have had time to do is ears.
I have to give you a ding dong.
"Ding dong!"
Finally! Jesus,
now I've been waiting.
Shanice.
Mama, this is a long gone,
'cause I would have left the room.
That (beep) AOL clip art.
That looks like a Vera Bradley makeup bag.
And that $14 CVS afro?
For some strange reason,
I'm just not getting Jimi Hendrix.
Yeah, it doesn't really read Jimi Hendrix at all.
Okay, Jake.
This is a five-minute look.
Are you in a makeup competition,
or are you in a sit on your ass competition?
He's wearing more makeup on his face
than she's got on hers.
Ha! He is.
He's like, "Well,
I haven't worked with small lips in a while,
so we're just skipping over that."
On the eye we've got like, gold tears.
They kind of represent my sister's emotions.
Oh, tears representing emotions.
Did you hear that, Trixie?
Sometimes tears can represent emotions.
I'm gonna take a nap.
"I used the eyeballs
to talk about looking."
That's simple.
Hannah.
That is what 2020 feels like.
I feel like, personally attacked.
'Cause this is my before photo.
Before I get into drag.
Absolutely marvelous.
I love that Belle Garland is always like,
"This makeup is incredible."
"Phenomenal!"
She loves to ride the emotions.
- Yes. - Yes.
Brandon.
Would you like to come forward, please?
This looks a bit like she's falling head first
into a cow pad.
She has cow (beep)
combed back into her hair.
James.
Oh.
That is the ding dong.
"Ding dong!"
In full bald cap,
full makeup, glitter.
And it's David Bowie
without being like an obvious,
"I'm just stealing the elements of this."
The way you put the stipple in there...
"What you've given me here,
it's not only gorgeous.
It's transcendent."
"It's something I think about when I wake up
when I go to sleep,
when I hang out with me Nan."
I have to say something.
I know that it looks crazy,
but I think his little Wario mustache
is (beep) hot.
Kinda sexy because
it doesn't match his hair on purpose.
It looks like he looks like a cartoon.
Thank you guys.
So, so much.
Thank you.
Way to go, champ.
Bernie, you failed to impress us.
However, lucky for you,
there was another look that was
far more disappointing than yours.
That's me responding to Dick pics on Grindr.
Yeah.
"Luckily for you there's one cock photo
that has impressed me the most."
Brandon.
He knew.
You could tell he knew.
Imagine if they had to construct an IKEA table.
Up next, this look.
Yeah.
For your face off today, freckles.
I don't see freckles on her.
I would have taken a brown Sharpie and go,
"boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop."
Time's up.
Please put your tools down.
Amazing how they get twins for these so that
you can judge it so well.
This is extra, what she does here.
I love the magnifying glass.
It (beep) looks like Professor McGonagall.
I think we need a conflab.
Shall we?
Yes.
(woman laughs)
- We need to have a conflab.
We need to have a conflab.
Shanice.
You'll be packing your kit and going home.
Oh, bummer.
But you know what?
I don't care what kind of freckles she did.
She should not be able to save herself from
that guitar on the chest.
"Your freckles were absolutely stunning
but we still remember what you did."
Glow Up, I'm going to address you directly
because you know who I am
and you know what I'm about.
And if you don't let me guest judge on this show.
No, no, no, no.
This it what, they,
they hire the both of us to do a "Trixie Challenge."
I'll be there to either add subterfuge
or sabotage or something.
Don't make me have to go "Ding Dong" in that lady's apartment.
Oh my God.
That's how you're going to apply for it.
She's going to be like,
- Ding dong. - "I can't believe someone's outside."
And you're just going, "Ding dong."
Anyway, it's a great show.
Check it out.
Catch up on Season One
and then watch Season Two.
It's lit.
Well, I feel like I've glowed up.
Have you glowed up?
I sure have.
But neither of us will ever compare
to the glamour of our friend.
You know what,
if anybody knows this person is, please tweet us.
Please let us know who you are.
I want to make you a star.
Yeah, they see a picture's worth a thousand words.
Mama, that's like an encyclopedia.
I only need two words for this.
- Ding... - Ding...
- Dong. - Dong.