Steve: Once in a while, you'll have to say yes to something you don't really want to do.
Steve: For instance: Parkers' half birthday party.
Steve: At least my boys were there to make the day a little bit better.
James: I am hungover dude. Dude I had six bottles of Merlot.
Steve: So, in the spirit of Easter, and Parkers half birthday-
Steve: Parker brought us to an abandoned zoo, to hunt for easter eggs.
Steve: I drove 45 minutes to pick up little plastic eggs off of the ground.
Steve: While walking to the secret location to pick up all the plastic eggs, James noticed his old house.
Steve: We couldn't believe our eyes. James actually had a surprise visiter.
Steve: We forcefully removed him from the property.
Steve: The area where Parker buried the eggs, was actually pretty interesting.
Steve: We found a lot of cool architecture.
Steve: Cib, being no stranger to impressing others, decided to show off his new move: spotted eagles.
Steve: That's when Parker informed us we had to catch 24 eggs before the day was up.
Steve: Since I don't play children's games, I didn't keep track of the score.
Steve: While searching for the eggs, Cib and I ran across a couple disgusting children named Sergio and Cassie.
Steve: We ditched Parker because we wanted to have a day that wasn't trash.
Steve: Lucky lucky us, we found some ice cream.
Steve: Is this cash only?
Steve: Cash only?
Steve: Cash?
Steve: Cash only?
Steve: Credit card?
Steve: Credit?
Steve: Cash?
Steve: Do you have cash?
Cib: Hm... no.
Steve: Buy me ice cream!
Cib: Do you take card? Can we bargain?
Steve: The ice cream man wouldn't bargain with us.
Steve: So Cib and I went home.
Steve: But on the way back, I remembered something that happened the other day during taco trip.
Steve: Something that I needed to address before we created the business.
Steve and Parker: What? About the draft?
Steve: The draft is starting?
James: Yeah, it's starting. So what they told me was that within the next 15 minutes
James: they're gonna, um, set up a waypoint for me to meet them at
James: Yeah, they told me that they're gonna give me a Waze link so I click it and I go to the browser version of the app.
Steve: How long are you gonna be gone?
James: Um, I think for about a week, they said... 17 years?
James: So they haven't told me anything all I know is that I'm gonna go, I'm gonna lead
James: I'm gonna do a great job, you know me I always come through.
Parker: Where are you leading? What are you doing?
James: I'm leading NASA.
Parker: You're leading NASA?
James: Yeah.
Parker: For 17 years and a week?
James: One day. One week.
Parker: Don't laugh, it's not funny!
Steve: I'm not laughing, you're on salary. Like I just gave you the c-
Cib: Yeah, we're on salary.
Steve: I just gave you the contract. So I'm just wondering...
James: I signed it.
Steve: Uh huh
Steve: Recently I've been having a lot of difficulty planning around everybody's schedules including my own.
Steve: I reluctantly went over to Parker's house to ask help from his scheduler: Jeremy.
Steve: Obviously hiring Jeremy was going to come with a couple stipulations.
Steve: Mostly to stop being the way he is.
Jeremy: You should come down to my basement.
Jeremy: There are some bodies that resulted from it.
Jeremy: If you ever need to make some extra money just hit me up, I got some things goin' on.
James: Don't offer jobs to me.
Steve: If you do become the scheduler of these videos, promise me.
Steve: Promise me you will stop acting like how you do.
Jeremy: People need kidneys, man. I know where to get 'em.
Steve: After I welcomed Jeremy to the team, I had to leave immediately.
Steve: Very recently I was invited by Steve Zaragoza
to perform onstage reading the worst episode of the show Lost.
Steve: On the big night, Alyssa actually couldn't go because she was walking the dogs and
doesn't like to support me as a creator.
Steve: I didn't want to go without her. So I had to make a change and use the resources I had at hand.
Steve: Yikes. Talk about awkward.
Steve: My new fiancé actually saw my old one on the sidewalk and they mingled a little bit.
Cib as Alyssa: Hope you don't mind your man gettin' stolen. Get man stolen, get man slaughtered.
Steve: Expecting the real Alyssa to get jealous, I was disappointed when they became good friends.
Cib as Alyssa: Stop, girlfriend, shoot.
Steve: I was getting genuinely uncomfortable with the relationship both of my fiancés were creating.
Steve: It was time to head to the event.
Cib as Alyssa: Dude my pussy's mad itchy.
Cib as Alyssa: It's a boy.
Steve Zaragoza: Alyssa's here! Alyssa you look beautiful.
Cib as Alyssa: Pleasure to meet you finally. Oh, you're too kind.
Steve Z: We've met before. Get in here. We've made love.
Cib: I know.
Steve: Oh she actually - Oh, did you leave your ring at home?
Cib: I just was, like I said, I'm here to snag up and dude cooter if I have too.
Steve: Bringing Cib to this event pretending to be my fiancé was more than just a bit.
Steve: Public speaking is my biggest fear.
Steve: and this was essentially my version of "imagine the audience without clothes on."
Steve: But even cushioning the experience with my personal Easter egg in the audience,
Steve: There's no stopping that trembling notion of inadequacy. I have no idea if it's even possible to truly get over that.
Steve: But all you can really do is say yes.
*Baby Blue by Tor Miller plays*
Cib: oh, no dude!