- Doesn't give a (meow) about me.
Meatball is a handful.
Does your mommy like femmes in tall platform shoes?
(upbeat music)
Hi, I'm Megan.
And today I'm gonna be picking a date based on their pet.
I'm looking for someone who knows who they are
and knows what they want.
I dated someone with a dog
and I've dated someone with a cat.
The dog requires so much more work,
but I'm a dog person, but I like the independence of a cat,
but I have no experience with cats.
So it's really a toss up which direction I'll go.
Sometimes pets are the exact same as their owners
and sometimes they're the exact opposite.
So I'm gonna have to figure out which it is.
- Hey, I'm Jax and this is Enzo, the cat.
You know, whoever I date, just
they need to get along with Enzo.
Enzo is the sweetest cat.
Just so, so personable, loves people,
loves to get scratches, very cuddly,
just all around 10 out of 10, great animal.
So we're both very outgoing, very extroverted, very vocal.
I think that she's gonna love Enzo
and I definitely think she'll pick me on a date.
- Hi, my name is Daja and this is Reese.
She came into my life about a year and a half ago.
I was living in Indiana at the time with my ex-girlfriend
and we decided to get two dachshunds.
I'm a Libra and she's an Aries, but my moon is in Aries.
It's almost like we have this silent communication
and I love it.
I think the bachelorette is gonna love Reese,
which is exactly why I brought her
because she's gonna pick me.
- Hi, I'm Janine and this is Meatball.
I've had her for like four years.
I literally walked into a shelter
and her paperwork said TV dog
and I was like, oh, this dog, it's a famous dog.
I can't adopt this dog.
So I asked one of the people and they were like, oh,
they took the cutest dogs and put them on the morning,
like a morning TV show.
And then I had to do like a weird silent bidding thing.
And I adopted her.
We're both chill vibes, I think.
And physical touch is her love language
and my love language.
I'm coming into this pretty confident
'cause nobody has ever met Meatball
and not been like, she's the greatest.
- It's been a long year.
And I'm excited to meet some people and meet some pets.
Oh, hi.
Oh, you're beautiful.
I don't know what to do with you, but you're pretty.
Hello there.
My name is Enzo.
I like scratches and back pats.
This is good to know.
I'm here with my mom's roommate, who I love very much.
Give me a treat and I will love you forever.
And then she drew a smiley face.
Are you gonna scratch me?
Do you want to smell me like a dog?
I don't know.
Okay, take in your surroundings.
No pressure.
Hey, doesn't give a (meow) about me.
This is cats.
Doesn't, just it couldn't care less.
- You gotta work for love.
You gotta work for it.
- I understand why people have cats.
I want to work for Enzo's love.
Enzo's curious.
I like that.
- Yeah, he is.
- Obviously a lesbian brought this cat in.
Not only 'cause she's here to date me,
but because she has a cat.
He has beautiful eyes.
Maybe his owner's roommate has beautiful eyes.
- I do have beautiful eyes.
- I could see a long happy future with Enzo
were he to give me a chance.
- The key to any cat's heart, you got to give him,
you gotta give him treats.
You gotta give them time.
Much like an actual relationship.
- Tiny licks.
Enzo's just exploring.
Enzo's just living his fricking life.
- You know, Enzo's got a personality of his own.
- Okay, bye Enzo.
It was nice to meet you.
Sorry you don't like me very much.
Maybe I'll meet your mommy's roommate later
and we can all work on our relationship.
(gasp)
Crying.
I'm crying, I'm crying.
I'm gonna read this card, okay.
- I love the pink aesthetics.
- Hi, my name is Reese.
And when the universe made me, she really outdid herself.
I love to travel and go on adventures with Mommy.
In fact, we are going to Romania in three weeks.
I'm fiercely loyal to the people in my life
and very passionate about my toys.
Is that a message?
(clapping)
- Wasn't a message, I don't know.
- She has her little head on my leg.
I would die for Reese.
I would die.
- This is so cute actually.
- She is looking at me with these big,
like Puss in Boots eyes, you know, from Shrek.
- That's how she gets anything from me.
- You're so beautiful.
If I were to get a dog, I would steal this dog.
- You can to, you can steal my dog.
- I feel like someone kind of gentle,
but also like passionate would have to have Reese.
- Oh my God, perceptive AF.
- It looks like Reese is looking at me in the face
and going, you wanna date my mom.
- Come on, you know you want to date her mom.
- Oh I love you so much.
This is already gonna be a really hard choice.
- I mean, it's just a perfect match.
You guys kind of already have that synchronicity
going on with the pink, so it's a thing.
- Bye Reece.
I love you.
Oh hi.
Hi.
You look familiar.
- She has met Meatball before.
- Oh, hi.
I'm Meatball.
I think I know Meatball.
- 'Cause my last roommate was friends with her.
- I'm a feet tall on a good day, eight feet?
- Two feet.
- And I require many pets.
I'm sorry I didn't ask permission before kissing you
but I just had to, smiley face.
- I have such the opposite energy
of what Meatball's giving off right now.
- Meatball is a handful.
I wonder if your mommy is also a freaking handful.
- I'm not a handful.
- Meatball's mom either has to be the opposite
and be absolutely so chill.
- She's sad that she can't say hi to everyone.
- If Meatball's mom is also this level of energy,
- I'm far too depressed to run into a room like that.
- I don't know how that would work
because I'm this level of energy.
So all three of us together,
that could be a great time or the worst.
- Meatball comes in hot, dude.
I personally do not,
but that's kind of our fun dynamic.
- Okay, it was nice to meet you.
I fear you and I respect you.
Okay, I met three pets today,
but I only get to meet one person.
- Moment of truth.
- Enzo was everything I'm not looking for in a person.
Skittish, afraid, wanted nothing to do with me.
But I do like that a cat is independent.
Reese, the dog.
When I tell you, I would give my life for Reese
and those sweet, beautiful eyes.
Though a dog is a lot to take care of.
And then there was Meatball.
I want to be friends with Meatball.
- Did we just get friend-zoned right off the top?
- Meatball and me have similar energies.
But do I want to spend an extended period of time with that?
I can only make one choice.
At this point in my life,
I am most valuing my independence
and my ability to pick up and go whenever I want
and have no reason to have to be home.
I think a dog mom's priorities
are gonna be taking care of the dog, which are good.
I just don't want that to be my priority at all.
- Enzo pulled through for me.
- So me and Reese's mom can be friends.
(crying)
- So you're rejecting my dog?
- But I want to go on a date with Enzo's mom's roommate.
- Okay, I'm gonna be real honest.
That was a twist.
- She picked me.
I'm excited to meet her.
- Hello.
- [Jax] Hi.
- I'm Megan.
- I'm Jax.
- Nice to meet you.
- It's nice to meet you.
- I'd shake your hand, but I'm not allowed.
- COVID.
- So this is your roommate's cat?
- Yes. Yes.
I personally don't take care of the cat,
but the cat spends a lot of time in my room.
So something you'd have to get used to.
- As long as I could spend a lot of time in your room.
(both laugh)
Too forward, too forward, nevermind.
Anyway, do you want to go on a date?
- Sure.
- We're on our way to get coffee and I'm holding Enzo.
- Yeah, Enzo's got to come along.
Gotta come along for the journey.
- Do you want to see me, do you wanna see me again?
- I'll think about it.
- Fair enough.
That's a yes, I'm sure that's a yes.
Well, I'd never had a cat join me on a date before,
so that was an interesting experience,
but I really liked getting to know Enzo and Jax
and I think I'll be seeing both of them again very soon.
(light happy music)