Renee: Dating is like a dance between predator and prey. And the thing is, is we actually
want to be caught and devoured by the right guy. Just like you guys are looking
for certain qualities within a woman, we're also instinctively searching for
certain traits within a man to give us permission to give ourselves into him. So,
all you need to do is know what those things are, and how to embody them so
that you can get her to chase you and want her even more without having to try
and convince her. I'm Renee Slansky for The Attractive
Man team and in this video, I'm going to give you the five things that women
instantly look for when going on a date with a guy.
I'm a dating and relationship expert.
And it is my aim to educate, you guys, on how to appeal as a more
confident and desirable man to any woman around the world. Now, I have spent the
last couple of years coaching thousands of women so I know exactly what it is
that they want. And I want to give you all of these insights for free.
So, if you haven't already subscribed to our YouTube channel make sure you do so
now and don't forget to give us a big thumbs up! Ok, let's talk first
impressions on first dates. This is really important because you want to
make sure that you know exactly what it is that she is looking for so that you
can tap into it and get the response that you want. Ok, so I did a little bit
of research out there apart from coaching all these women around the
world, I also created a poll. And I wanted to know what it is that women really
look for and what it is that they're attracted to in order to be able to say
"yes" to a date or "yes" to another date with the guy. So, I encourage you not to
rush over this and to really take notes. So, let's jump straight into those
Top Five Things, right now. #5: Confidence Now, before you switch off and
think; yeah, yeah, confidence, confidence. I hear this all the time. Guys, you're here for
a reason. Confidence to us is sex appeal to you.
You see we really desire and are attracted to men who have confidence. Now,
let's not confuse confidence with ego. If you want to come on a date and you've
got ego attached to who it is that you are and what it is that you want to push
on us with your own agenda and things like that,
then it's actually going to be a turn-off. Confidence to us, is more about
representing that, you know, who you are that you have direction in your life.
Therefore, we get this sense that you're able to also lead us. Instinctively us, as
women really are attracted to men who are confident because it makes us feel
more safe. It makes us believe that you're able to control a situation. And
it really helps us step into who we are as women. Now, I'm even going to go as far
to say that confidence to us is more important than looks. In fact, women are
more likely to go on a date with a guy who maybe isn't typically as
good-looking. If he exudes confidence as opposed to a guy who is really
good-looking but it just doesn't have the same sort of confidence about him.
And the reason why I have mentioned this one, first, because it really is the first
thing that we are absolutely drawn to. If you are walking into a room and you're
able to hold your own self, you have body posture, and an energy that exudes the
fact that, you know, that you are worthy and you know who it is that you are and
that you don't have to prove anything to anyone,
then we are actually going to be drawn to you. It's crazy! Confidence to us is
like a massive magnet. Now, if you haven't downloaded our confidence cheat sheet,
then I recommend that you just stop right now and you do that because if you
can master being a confident man in life, as he's not having to prove anything to
anyone but just really understanding how to exude confidence even if you don't
feel confidence while you're slowly building that affirmation within
yourself, then, it is literally going to change the dating game for you.
#4: Decisiveness Can I just say this, guys? There is nothing sexier than a
man with a plan. A man who is able to actually take control and make a
decision and have some sort of direction about his life, about that date, about
what he's doing tomorrow, is a man that makes us believe that he has the future
in mind. You see, us, women we really want to be led. We are drawn to men who are
able to step up and show those qualities of being able to be a leader. What this
does is actually trigger a response within as women to follow you and to be
led by you and to almost be that damsel. It's not to say that we want you to be a
hero. Trust me, women want but more than a hero. This is about you
showing us, women, that you're able to take control of a situation that you're
able to be decisive about what it is that you want. And that way, that really
makes us feel safer in your presence. When it comes to right now, on the day
but also what could happen later on down the track. A great way to really show
that you're a man with the plan is to really put some thought into the date.
Don't just ask her what it is that she wants and be wishy-washy about
everything. Make sure that your answers and your responses have some sort of
finality to them, okay. Now, obviously, you don't want to be coming across too pushy
and you don't want to becoming across too controlling. At the same time, if
you're able to already organize everything, whether it's the restaurant,
the order, the wine, you know, kind of step into that role of being the one to lead,
the way that the date is going, honestly, we are going to be swimming.
#3 Now this is a big one. Besides confidence, I would have to say that this one, #3,
is probably one of the biggest ones that we actually really want. And
that is Security. We need to know that we feel safe in your presence, not only safe
to be who it is that we are as a woman without fear of being compared to
another woman, but also safe that you are going to take advantage of us, that
you're able to protect us. We, as women always have this kind of nurturing side
to us and part of that nurturing element within us means that we're actually
yearning to know that the men that we have in our life are able to take care
of us. I'm not talking about "taking care of us financially," I'm talking about the
fact that if there's danger in there, you're able to step up and defend us. Now,
this doesn't mean that you're going aggressive and you have to turn into a
superhero, put on your ninja moves or anything like that. Guys, you can make a
woman feel safe simply by the way that you respond to the environment that you
take her to, also choosing the safe environment and also by listening to
what she says and really kind of identified when she starts to look
anxious about something and putting her mind at ease. Simple ways to make her
feel safe is also by standing next to her so that
you can actually feel your energy if you're in a situation where, maybe,
there's a lot of other guys around or maybe, it's a little bit of a rowdy crowd.
Another way to make her feel safe is simply by asking her "Are you okay?" "Do you
want to go somewhere else?" "Is this alright?" By actually putting her concerns
first, she's really going to feel, not only prioritized, but also valued. And you
know what guys? That is a major thing that we want to know, that we're able to
actually have from you on the very first date. If we don't feel safe in your
presence because you're either too intimidating or you're comparing us
against other women, or you'll just have no concern for our sort of safety in the
environment that you've taken us, then chances are you'll never hear from us ever again.
#2 Listening Skills Look, we all know that we, as women
can talk and talk and talk and talk and talk.
It is science! We talk something like 13,000 more words than you guys every single
day. You can't beat it. So you might as well just know how to accommodate it and
use it to your advantage. And the way that you use lots of our talking to your
advantage is simply by sitting back and listening. Now, this isn't about being a
passive listener and just going. This is about actually actively listening and
using what it is that we're saying to be able to, somehow, woo us with that later
on down the track. What I mean by this is if she says to you "Oh I've got family,"
"I've got brothers and sisters," you might say up "What are their names?" and then she
can go into a story. If you want to really show that you're actively
listening, then ask questions. Now, the good thing is because you're actually
being present in that conversation and you are asking questions, you're actually
going to retain what it is that she's saying a little bit more. Not to mention
get to know more about her and then you're able to use whatever information
it is that she's feeding you on say other dates. For instance, if she mentions
that she is allergic to fish, you know, if the next day don't take her to a seafood
restaurant. Or if she mentions that she really loves a certain flower, then maybe,
the next day you want to actually bring a sunflower because that's her favorite
flower. When you, guys, listen to us especially from the first date, because
that is when we're really starting to get to know whether or not we want to go
on a second date with you, it signals to us that you are making us a priority.
And once again, that you are valuing who it is that we are and what
it is that we have to say. It makes us feel excited, and it actually sets you
apart from other guys out there. And lastly, #1, the big one, Chivalry.
Oh yes, that's right! Romance is not dead, guys. And don't think
that you can get away with not romancing us. We are women, we crave that. I'm just
gonna be honest; it doesn't really seem that there are a lot of gentlemen out
there in the world and if you really want to set yourself apart from all the
other guys out there and all the other competition, then come across as a true
gentleman. You see, when you're dating a woman it's not about getting to second
base as fast as you can. If you really want to actually start to accelerate and
escalate that relationship or that date, then I can guarantee you're actually
going to get there faster if you act like a gentleman as opposed to a man
that just kind of wants to see quick the Lord of thing. A gentleman is someone who
is kind and considerate, a gentleman is someone who maybe doesn't swear as much.
A gentleman is someone who opens the car door, who pulls out the chair, who
pays for the bill. Man, if you're not paying for the bill on the first date,
I'm sorry but I would actually tell all of these women not to date you.
The reason why is not about us, taking your money; it's not about us, trying to
use you or take advantage of you. It's actually an opportunity for you to be
able to step up and show that you're able to really take care of her as the
woman and be a gentleman. Now, I know that we live in a day and age where we've got
feminism and it's kind of like, "Well, if I do this, you should think I'm gonna come
across as weak, you know" and it's just all really kind of confusing. You know,
women still, even no matter what the changes are out there, have this desire
within them which is triggered by certain actions within a man. So if you
are really wanting to be with a woman who is able to respond to you being a
gentleman, then the only way you're going to know is if you actually put those
actions into place. Chivalry will never go out of style and
I promise you guys that the more that you actually start to invest in wooing
your lady, old-school calling her, showing that you as someone who was able
to just take it slow and really make her feel special, then hands-down, she's gonna
be eating out of your hands. The thing is, guys, tapping into what it is that we
really crave as women is actually going to make us want to have a second date
with you. It's going to make us want to tell our girlfriends about you, our mom,
our doctor, our dog, everyone, because that's what we do. We talk to the people
in our world when we're really crazy about a guy. So if you want to leave her
at the end of the night, really desiring you, and being crazy about you, and
thinking about you, because you actually really like her as well, then I promise
you, if you put these five things into place,
you are going to make an awesome impression on her. Now, of course you want
to make sure that the date is constantly progressing to a level where it's
getting beyond platonic, where you're able to feed that chemistry, where you're
able to show that you can take control and make a decision and lead the
relationship or the date in the way that you want it to go, well if you want to
know how to do that effectively, then I suggest that you stop right now and you
download our escalation cheat sheet. This escalation cheat sheet that Matt put
together is actually really awesome because what it does is it helps give
you strategies and know what to say and what to do to take it from platonic to
chemistry next level. All you need to do to download that is simply click the
image at the bottom of this screen. And don't forget that there is a link in the
bio as well. And you know what? Don't just download it,
and like have it sit there, actually read it and read it before you go on a date,
so that when you're going on a date, you do have a bit of a plan. You've got more
confidence to know what to do with a certain situation arises and once again,
so that you can actually accelerate the date in the direction that you want it
to go. Alright guys, and that's it for this video! Don't forget to give us a big
thumbs up and subscribe, if you haven't already, I'm Renee Slansky for
The Attractive Man team. Please tell us in the comments below what it is that you
struggle, maybe out of these top fives, that you wish that you had more tips
about. And don't forget to share this with a mate if he needs a little bit of
help as well. Alright, until next time! Bye for now!